I hate that scary old bastard.

Not the one that came to my Grotto, by the way.

http://www.southflorida.com/events/sfl-scaredsanta,0,2245506.photogallery?coll=sfe-events-headlines&index=1

Thanks for that one, tikimonkey.

(Copy the whole link and paste manually- or can a moderator fix this for me?)

[ Edited by: martiki on 2004-12-22 00:28 ]

[ Edited by Humuhumu to fix link ]

[ Edited by: Humuhumu on 2004-12-22 01:15 ]

I don't get it. I was never scared of Santa. Somebody dressed in a big bunny suit for Easter...that's weird. I think my mom always avoided bringing me to that. Oh yeah....that's probably why I'm such a 'mentally balanced' guy.

Some of those Santas are truly scary, one of 'em looks drunk as a skunk! Nice rings under the eyes, buddy! It's probably these early wierd forced Santa experiences that are stored deep in people's subconscious that makes them hate clowns.

There's a professional Santa that has reason to visit my workplace every so often. He has flowing white hair and the real beard and mustache, which is quite impressive, and he's a quite nice person, but whenever I wind up talking to him, I just want to hightail it outta there as fast as I can.

At the end of those pictures, under the "More Fun for the Holidays" links, I misread "Santa Simulator" as "Santa Stimulator" and got totally creeped out for 5 seconds.

I'd kinda be scared of this one. Santa #7.

[ Edited by: Turbogod on 2004-12-22 04:59 ]

When I was 22 I was a mall Claus, Laguna Hills Mall. Some kids were TERRIFIED of me. Some parents insisted on getting a picture of screaming, pleading, crying kid on Santa's lap. I swear, if I had been an monster with blood running down my fangs, these kids would not have been more scared. One kid bit me, he was so frightened, he was trying to get away. He's SCREAMING and crying, I lift him to the ground and he runs to dad who just picks him up and drops him back in my lap. I say, "Yo Braniac, if you were feeding you son to tiger he wouldn't be more scared, psychological scars take a long time to heal man, try again next year". He smiles dumbly at me and starts snapping Polaroid's. Then he comes back and insists on showing me these pictures. Despite the Santa beard, wig and makeup I look totally pissed off and the kid is wide eyed horrified, screaming like Jamie Lee Curtis in "Halloween". There's a pic for next years X-mas card.

Mahalo,
Al

Priceless!!!

what are you looking at Al?

Looks like I'm not scared of Santa. Funny, I just found this pic on my server the other day!

We took our 18 Month-old Gran'daughter to see Santa last week & I could just read her mind: "This guy doesn't know he has to hang on to me tight. I'm gonna get down & take off!" We snapped the picture, she hopped down & I caught her before she'd gone 3 feet.

I thought that Old Scary Bastard recently died.

Oh wait, sorry. I was thinking Old Dirty Bastard.

I love that scary old bastard... maybe a little too much:

I'm tellin' ya... properly placed mistletoe (or mint in a pinch) makes Santa a whole lot friendlier:

Aw yeah... who's your Santa?

On 2004-12-24 13:48, Humuhumu wrote:
I'm tellin' ya... properly placed mistletoe (or mint in a pinch) makes Santa a whole lot friendlier ...

Funny ... somehow I never require even that little incentive! (Great pics Humuhumu!)

:P

Cheers!

I found this one though I'm sure I have at least one with my brother trying to make an escape. This was in about 1961 or 1962. I'm the dysfunctional looking kid on the left side of the picture.

Cheers!

...bumped for Christmas.

Thanks pablus! I was trying to find that site, I couldn't remember where I saw it. It kills me everytime!

...'tis the season, to BUMP!

new link! click here

Now available in print form!

[ Edited by: stuff-o-rama 2008-12-14 11:50 ]

You can find these as Christmas cards also-I sent some out this year.

This one disturbs me the most I think:

I think Santa needs his smoke break!

Here's the link to where that old link moved to (if that makes any sense at all...).

My parents used to pound into us kids that "your good word is priceless" and "a man is only as good as his word" and "Lying is a sin"
So at 11 years old when a kid down the street said there is no Santa Clause and my Mom just told me there is, I bloodied his nose. When I got home and confronted my Mom, she just laughed at me and said there is no Santa clause, that I was "Old enough to know"
I decided that I never want to LIE to my kids. My Wife and I never did Santa Clause with the kids, they knew that he was a fictional person just like they knew that it was not a 6 foot rat running around Disneyland, they were able to have fun with it but we never lied to them. We used to get their pictures taken with the mall Santas too, just like they had their picture taken with Mickey and Minnie and they knew it was pretend and they had a lot of fun with it too. Now as Adults, they are doing the same.

When i used to run a Burl-Q club every year we used to have our very own "Sleazy Santa in his Grotty Grotto", for extra authenticity our Santa used to the same costume every year but left it unwashed.