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Beyond Tiki, Bilge, and Test / Bilge

Names of products that you loved.

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Since products began getting named, they have strived for titles which evoke images that move the spirit. Some are classic like Spiced Ham=Spam. Marshmallow spread “Fluff” rather than marshmallow spread. The middle letters of “cREam” being placed between two wafer shaped letters yielding O-re-o.

The Harley Davidson “Fat Boy” is an amuzing example of a product targeted at a select market that would find it funny while most across the board consumers might not choose that. I love that it is so different than the slick and stealthy “Shadows and Ninjas…

There were some magnificent named products for many years….(Rambler Scrambler, Hudson Terraplane, Plymouth Super Bee… then for a long while it seems Cars were named after European Cities, and Trucks after Indian Tribes to the point of nausea

What product name do you admit to falling for?

MAGNUM.

The Car or the Malt-Likka. (Malt Liquor is another product named after bold stuff)

There is an English Beer named "Speckled Hen" which I find charming.

T

On 2005-03-14 12:56, Gigantalope wrote:
The Car or the Malt-Likka.

The condoms :wink:

D

Scooter pies and chocolate Yoohoo.Great names for dubious products.

RR

On 2005-03-14 12:52, Tiki-bot wrote:
MAGNUM.

The P.I.

P

When I think "lawn and garden" I think REEMCO.

http://www.reemco.com

(with a nod to TheMuggler)

Hey Pablus, nice Reemco website.

I was worried at the "Enter Reemco" area, and what I might end up with.

Funny that they have a toy section.

As much as the product names, I miss the product adjectives. I long for the days when cereal was "sugar sparkled" and cars were "spanking fresh".

Sabu

When I was in High School I had a priodically worked doing window paintings on shops.
At some point I purchased a "Kit" which was thinking it would make me appear more professional.

In this kit which seemed mostly to be made for used car lots, were such Calworthingtonian phrases as "Fire Cracker","Hot" and "Cream Puff".

My favorite was the moronic "LOOK!" with the eyeballs in the OO's.

I spraypainted LOOK! all over town...dumpsters, optimoligists offices, a waste treatment plant, all in festive in day-glo.

LOOK!

I have not thought of that in 20 years or so.

Cheers Sabu

I didn't love these products, but they stuck in my mind.
Dippity Do
Carnations' instant slender
papermate
Lestoil
Asper Gum
TANG
All my mom had to say to me was I think we should give you a Toni perm. and I hide and cry. Just saying the word bring back that smell to me. yuck!
I know I'm really showing my age here..
Also some fav. ads come to mind:

Take it off, take it all off

Ancient Chinese secret, huh?

and I always liked ol' Josephine the plumber
whew! I spent way too much time watching commercials

[ Edited by: exotica59 on 2005-03-15 20:26 ]

When I was 15 I got mono from a boyfriend. I can remember him coming over when I was sick, holding up one of the caulking guns and singing. I can't think of anything else when I see that brand.

"got the mono, mono
got the mono, mono
got the mono!"

Etch-a-Sketch. My brothers were in awe of my ability to draw a perfect circle.

Mr. Wiggle
Danish Go Rounds
Bonomo Turkish Taffy
Jello 1-2-3
7-Up candy bars
Puffa Puffa Rice
Freakies
"Pussycat" cocktail mix (I'm sure if I tasted it now I'd retch, but I though it was great as a kid)
ALL the Funny Face flavors.
Pssssst! (that spray junk that was supposed to clean hair between shampoos...but didn't)
Liddle Kiddles ( I had a jillion of them, now can only find one, and it's mostly green)
Gobbledygook (although the Root Beer flavor was the only one not completely putrid)
All the pretty little bottles of Bols liqueurs, in all the colors.

One thing I do remember but do NOT miss is Boston Baked Beans candy! Ugh! Apparently they still make them, my friend sent me one of those nostalgic candy boxes and they were in there. Oh, they are vile!

[ Edited by: purple jade on 2005-03-15 21:40 ]

Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific! NOT!
Retchid shampoo that smelled of fruity perfume..

The Ferarra Pan company that makes the Boston baked Beans recently re-named all of their candies to make them more "PC" Now all the flavors are "heads" as in LemonHeads, GrapeHeads, AppleHeads, CherryHeads, etc. Their former names were "Johnny Apple Treats","Alexander the Grape","Cherry Chans" (these had little cherries with chinese hats and slanted eyes on the box, they then changed the name to "Cherry Clans" which wasn't really a better name but it rhymed. I guess they thought people wouldn't notice it was more offensive than Chans.)

I still giggle whenever someone offers me "Pirate's Booty" --Bootylicious!

[ Edited by: stuff-o-rama on 2005-03-16 01:15 ]

One word: Weeble.

heehee

tikivixen, who wobbles but does NOT..

...much.

Purple Jade, is there still a chain of restaurants in New Orleans called "Takee Outee"?"Gee, your hair..." and Pssssst...I remember those from my sisters. Hair products seem prone to frequent trends such as Balsam, Botanicals, Jojobe, and Herbal essences.

Janitor in a drum was a product that was unforgettable, and the [unchline of every ethnic joke involving testube babies.

On the romantic side there was a cat food (and may be still) "Glamour Puss" and Dessert named "Whip N Chill"

Also does anyone remember a curious product that was floral contact paper that kept roaches away called "No Bugs M'Lady"?

Astronaut Ice Cream
Big League Chew
Bugles
Chocodiles
Fruit Stripe Gum
Marathon Bar
Mello Yello
Nutter Butter Peanut Butter Sandwich Cookies
Orange Crush
Pixy Stix
Pizza Quick Sauce
Push-Ups
Quisp Cereal
Yoohoo

Screaming Yellow Zonkers
Koogle
Thick and Frosty

Is THAT what Cherry Clans are? I remember seeing a box with that on it by the register at Monk's on Seinfeld and wondering what that could be, and why it was visible in that particular show. Not too a shrewd a marketing scheme in that name change. I doubt the Scots rejoiced and said "At last, a candy fer US!".

Used to love Lemonheads though.

Takee Outee! Yeah, I think there's still one in N.O. East. That's what I've always called any kind of Chinese takeout! And probably a lot of other New Orleanians do too. (I never ate from an actual Takee Outee however, always seemed a little iffy. And whiffy.)

Takee Outee had 94 cent 20 oz beers in paper cups to go.

There's a cartoon in VIZ called "Fat Slags" and they eat at a place called "E-Ko-Li" which seems to be based on Takee Outee in the UK.

Screeming Yellow Zonkers, who could pass them up for Fiddlefaddle or Poppycock?

in the '60 there was actually a vile fruit flavored punch called "Spook"

King Vitaman.

Cars

Swinger
Scamp
Lil Huslter
Thing
Dodge made somthing called "Scat Pack"

Takee Outee had 94 cent 20 oz beers in paper cups to go.

Bur more important, cheap food on sharp sticks late at night when you're good and stupid drunk.

J
JTD posted on Wed, Mar 16, 2005 7:55 PM

*On 2005-03-16 01:14, stuff-o-rama wrote:*The Ferarra Pan company that makes the Boston baked Beans ...

They also make one of the all-time greats...Atomic Fire Balls! What duck and cover kid could resist that name.

Oh yeah, there's one kind of product that always got me...doggie treats shaped like people food, like Pup-a-roni or Doggie Donuts.

I love product names that are sentences, as mentioned before - 'Gee Your Hair Smell Terrific' and 'I Can't Beleive Its Not Butter!' and 'Chock Full of Nuts'/

Im trying to think of funny canadian product names but all I can come up with is Homo milk. And thats not a product, thats just what we call full fat milk (homogenized). Though now I have notices they have stopped putting that on the label.

Moo Juice

On 2005-03-16 10:28, Gigantalope wrote:
King Vitaman.

Hoooly shit Gigantalope, thats awesome! I didn't think anybody remembered that cereal. Every time I bring it up nobody remembers.
The guy that played the king in the commercials lived down the street from me when I was a kid. I remember thinking he was a REAL celebrity back then.
I always dug those totally dangerous outlawed toy from that same era,...'Clackers' or some people called them 'Knockers'. I used to knock myself senseless with those damn things.

On 2005-03-16 20:09, purple jade wrote:
Oh yeah, there's one kind of product that always got me...doggie treats shaped like people food, like Pup-a-roni or Doggie Donuts.

Pup-a-roni had the Postal Carrier shaped cookies. Genius! but no camparison to:
Snausages!

Oh, and I almost forgot the ladies' choice:
Man-which!

[ Edited by: stuff-o-rama on 2005-03-17 03:26 ]

K

Q: Why did the Italian girl sleep naked?

A: She wanted to keep her Tony home permanent.

how about pop rocks + coke + mikey's mouth = kaboom

oh ya, I remember clackers! Got a pretty big knot on my head from them, but I still played with them.
Also like the creepy crawler cooker thing. You put some sort of goop into a metal mold and then cooked em'. got burned a couple of times, but had to make the creepy crawlers to replace items in my Feely meely (sp?) game box. You and three of your friends would stick your hand inside this box and have to guess that it was you were holding without peeking.

Gotta be Squirmel.

Fizzies!

These were a packet of tablets that you dropped into a glass of water that started to fizz and transformed into a fizzy soda-pop. Made possible by the artifical sweetener sodium cyclamates. When a rat died of cancer after being given twice it's body weight in cyclamates every day for half of it's life, cyclamates was banned as a carcinogen and that was the end of fizzies.

I was reminded of fizzies recently when using a relatively new product called Airborne. Airborne is a dietary supplement that is supposed to prevent cold and flu. It actually works faily well, too. It is a tablet that you drop into water and it fizzes just like fizzies and alka-seltzer. While Alka-Seltzer does not remond me of Fizzies, Airborne did.

i remember having Incredible Edibles (tastier version of creepy crawlers)~ a fairly dangerous toy.. no safety guards around the heated metal platens, pulled out with wobbly plastic tweezers ~ and as an impatient child, peeling and eating the hot saccharine-filled Gobble-DeGoop as soon as possible! good times...

and abba zabba (luckily they still make these)

Gobbledy GOOP, that's right!
Still the root beer was the only remotely edible one. Wasn't there a licorice flavor that was particularly vile?

Can't believe I forgot about all the K-Tel and Popeil products...
What would life have been like without the Pocket Fisherman and Mr. Microphone?

I smoke "Bali Shag"

Tangaroa: I remember dropping about $10.00 in quarters to get each color of those Squirmels!! And the Incredible Edibles were a fav. What a walk down memory lane with all these great (and not so great) products! My Nana always stocked the cupboard with Ring Dings and Royal Crown Cola. My Mom would have a fit cuz we'd stuff ourselves with Ring Dings and get sugar comas.
Alberto VO5
Breck (I'm a Breck Girl!)
Chef BoyArDee Pizza in a box (Ugh!)
Rocket Popsicles
Actually buying Fireworks from the stand on the corner AND setting them off in the driveway for the Fourth!
MoonPies
Chico-Stix
Sugar Smacks (now they call 'em...what? I can't even remember and theyr'e in my pantry!)
Sugar Pops (Corn Pops)
Mrs Cubbisons (The commercial pissed me off so bad, my sister taunts me with it to this day: Mrs. Cubba Cubba Cubba Cubba Cubbison's!)
Or the commercial for Coco's (Coco's is the place, and I like it like that!) Argh!!!
Dolphin's Shorts. (You KNOW you wanted them!)
Member's Only Jackets (ditto)
Vaurnets
Not products, really, but...
A persona like Jeff Spicoloi's
A bod like Linda Barrett's
A car like Brad Hamilton's
Damn I'm old.

Did you mean
"Member's Only Jackets (ditto)"

or

Ditto's?

Dittos??

You are not the only one who is old

D

Incredible edibles! How about ShrinkyDinks?The melting plastic doodads that you would color and then put in the oven and watch them contort and shrink to a tiny size? Another "burn the hell out of your fingers as a little child" fun project.I don't recall really doing anything with them,except marveling at them reduce in size through the oven door.I'm showing MY age now!

DITTOS!! And Chemin de Fer, Sergio Valente (Oh Oh, Sergio!) Which one did Brooke Sheilds model? Some to remember (or forget):
Parachute Pants
Stirrup pants
Capezio ballett flats
slouch sox
China Dolls
Loves Baby Soft
Candies
Le Tigre
Legwarmers
Lipsmackers
2 different pairs of Chuck Taylor's hi tops
randomly bleached jeans
penny loafers (no sox)
Beat It jackets
Tab
Flaky Flix (A Nana staple)
Coconut Yoohoo
Reggie Bar (My school made us try to sell them as a PTA fund raiser, we just ate them all)
Freakies cereal
Goober Grape (peanut butter swirled with jelly)
Munchos (still my fav)
Funny Face (like Kool-aid, but not as Kool)
I could go on & on...

[ Edited by: Hau 'oli Tiki on 2005-03-17 15:28 ]

I believe nothing came between Brooke and her Calvins.

On 2005-03-17 15:09, Hau 'oli Tiki wrote:
2 different pairs of Chuck Taylor's hi tops

I still have multiple pairs of Cons, including a pair of Wine-red Crushed Velvet Platform Oxford-style AllStars. I'd love to find a pair of AllStars in my favorite style: Flourescent Orange Knee-hi Roll-downs with flourescent lining (either yellow or green), my last pair died & I haven't been able to find a replacement since.

Although I'm not currently wearing a pair of AllStars, I am wearing a pair of Converse Warriors in White, Green & Black.

doc martins used to be the best.

now it appears they're not made in england anymore. i find the quality pretty disappointing.

I have like 10 pairs of REEF flip flops. I loose them and have to buy another pair just to find the old pair a year later. My flip flops go back 20 years and I have green ones, striped ones, fancy straps and plain black straps. Last year I saw a pair with a crown on it and it was the first pair I bought not for necessity. I'm a flip flop man for sure. Never fell for those "river sandals" and let me tell ya, it was lean years for us flip flopers.

Oh, we're talking shoes?

Wavy-soled Famolares and spatulate Earth shoes.

With toe socks.

(Never liked any of the above...)

And P.S. I still can't believe the crocheted poncho made a comeback.

And I just got a look at those blood red Target Peeps...UGH! They look like marshmallow roadkill!

[ Edited by: purple jade on 2005-03-18 11:49 ]

Marshmellow "peeps" always make into my Peter Rabbit Easter basket.

I'm not sure if this was a midwest only thing or not, but I remember some sort of platic Sheet that you could hang over your tv screen, and then you could draw on it to help out a cartoon by the name ( if think) of Winky Dink, Winky dink would be running away from a bad guy, but "oh no!" "the bridge is out Winky dink needs your help kids, draw in the bridge now." I always wondered how many kids drew directly on the tv screen.
I also remember having to watch Ray Rayner, Bozo the clown, and BJ and the Dirty Dragon show every weekday. Not products, but they all had heavy kid product commercials.

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