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Beyond Tiki, Bilge, and Test / Beyond Tiki

Ask Dr. Z?!?!

Pages: 1 2 48 replies

M
MachTiki posted on 07/01/2006

I saw this today and got a kick out of reading Ask Dr. Z

Hmmmmm. Seems we can do that right here anytime we want?!

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/01/2006

On 2006-07-01 06:53, MachTiki wrote:
I saw this today and got a kick out of reading Ask Dr. Z

Hmmmmm. Seems we can do that right here anytime we want?!

Well, m'friends, you'll notice if you go to the site, that it says clearly "I am not the real Dr. Z, but his internet assistant." Like I need an internet assistant, right? (And I don't know who this German guy is...) At any rate, this "Internet-Z" is apparenly well versed in everything you may want to know about DaimlerChrysler (which is one word now), but nothing about anything else. The REAL Doctor Z knows shit about cars, but lots about other stuff.

So - sure: gotta question, ask me anytime! :) :drink:

M
Moki posted on 07/01/2006

Here's my question......
Why did you leave behind all the loving painted tiki masks to be sold by some stranger on E-Bay?? :wink: :wink:

Ha Ha
Something I painted was sold on E-Bay!! Johnny Velour and I are famous now!! :wink:

C
Chongolio posted on 07/01/2006

Dear Dr Z, Where can I find information on fixing a misfiring Blunderbuss?

Your Friend,
Chongolio

JT
Jungle Trader posted on 07/01/2006

Dear Dr. Z, what should I do when the cherry from a herbal cig falls in Chongolio's lap while he's driving? Should I spit on it? Should I slap it till it's out. Should I shoot spit wads at it from afar with the long straws from his Ohana Hut. What is the approppriate thing to do? I am not gay. Your advice please.

F
freddiefreelance posted on 07/04/2006

On 2006-07-01 11:51, Jungle Trader wrote:
Dear Dr. Z, what should I do when the cherry from a herbal cig falls in Chongolio's lap while he's driving?

Dear Dr. Z, is it A herbal cig or AN herbal cig?

CC
Cherry Capri posted on 07/04/2006

Hey - i am not in the habit of falling off of cigars!!!

http://www.tikicentral.com/viewtopic.php?mode=viewtopic&topic=12635

UB
Unga Bunga posted on 07/04/2006

Dear (Wild Man) Dr. Z,
How can I get laid at your next party?
Just Wonderin,
Unga

DS
Dr. Shocker posted on 07/05/2006

Dear Dr. Z........if you had two bottles of cheap rum what would you make

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/05/2006

On 2006-07-01 10:50, Moki wrote:
Here's my question......
Why did you leave behind all the loving painted tiki masks to be sold by some stranger on E-Bay?? :wink: :wink:

Ha Ha
Something I painted was sold on E-Bay!! Johnny Velour and I are famous now!! :wink:

I left them behind SO you would become famous! :wink:

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/05/2006

On 2006-07-01 11:11, Chongolio wrote:
Dear Dr Z, Where can I find information on fixing a misfiring Blunderbuss?

Your Friend,
Chongolio

I'd suggest giving it to a Chaos Dwarf. After that, for chrissakes - keep it away from your eyes!! :wink:

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/05/2006

On 2006-07-01 11:51, Jungle Trader wrote:
Dear Dr. Z, what should I do when the cherry from a herbal cig falls in Chongolio's lap while he's driving? Should I spit on it? Should I slap it till it's out. Should I shoot spit wads at it from afar with the long straws from his Ohana Hut. What is the approppriate thing to do? I am not gay. Your advice please.

I s'pose it depends on what he's driving. But for the most part, I'd say blow on it. :wink:

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/05/2006

On 2006-07-04 11:00, freddiefreelance wrote:

On 2006-07-01 11:51, Jungle Trader wrote:
Dear Dr. Z, what should I do when the cherry from a herbal cig falls in Chongolio's lap while he's driving?

Dear Dr. Z, is it A herbal cig or AN herbal cig?

It's a clove. :wink:

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/05/2006

On 2006-07-04 13:11, Unga Bunga wrote:
Dear (Wild Man) Dr. Z,
How can I get laid at your next party?
Just Wonderin,
Unga

Come to it, for starters... :wink:

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/05/2006

On 2006-07-05 11:36, Dr. Shocker wrote:
Dear Dr. Z........if you had two bottles of cheap rum what would you make

A trade for something better. :wink:

C
cynfulcynner posted on 07/06/2006

That other "Ask Dr. Z" site SUCKS!! All they talk about are CARS, and crappy ones at that.

Dr. Z, do you own any Aflac plans? Wanna buy some? :D

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/06/2006

On 2006-07-05 19:14, cynfulcynner wrote:

Dr. Z, do you own any Aflac plans? Wanna buy some? :D

Only if it's sold to me by that duck that hit Fabio in the face! :wink:

(OK, so its a goose - whatever...) :P

C
cynfulcynner posted on 07/06/2006

On 2006-07-05 20:55, Doctor Z wrote:

Only if it's sold to me by that duck that hit Fabio in the face! :wink:

Ducks can't obtain licenses to sell insurance -- not in California, anyway. 8)

Another question for you: Will you be attending the Bay Area Bar Crawl (or whatever they call it) this year?

8T
8FT Tiki posted on 07/07/2006

Hey Doc, I had a little problem with my Dad's car. It kinda ran off the road and hit this dudes mailbox thing and then a fence or two I think. Maybe it was a haystack. Anyway, I don't want him to find out and what I need to know is how can I shove that airbag thing back into the dashboard so he won't be suspicious. (If he finds out I know he'll be really sore and I really need my allowance this week.)
Thanks in advance for your help.

G
GROG posted on 07/07/2006

Hey Doc, it hurts when GROG does this. What should GROG do?

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/07/2006

On 2006-07-06 21:34, 8FT Tiki wrote:
Hey Doc, I had a little problem with my Dad's car. It kinda ran off the road and hit this dudes mailbox thing and then a fence or two I think. Maybe it was a haystack. Anyway, I don't want him to find out and what I need to know is how can I shove that airbag thing back into the dashboard so he won't be suspicious. (If he finds out I know he'll be really sore and I really need my allowance this week.)
Thanks in advance for your help.

Simply replace the airbag with Jiffy-Pop popcorn, like we had when we were kids. For the next person that has an accident, it will 'expand' like an airbag and not only will it save their life, it will provide them with a tasty snack until the paramedics arrive! :wink:

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/07/2006

On 2006-07-06 22:20, GROG wrote:
Hey Doc, it hurts when GROG does this. What should GROG do?

Get someone else to do it, then blame them. :wink:

C
cynfulcynner posted on 07/08/2006

I have this sore on my naughty bits that won't heal. What should I do? :lol:

B
bigtikidude posted on 07/10/2006

Dear Dr. Z,
what is in that weird japanese drink, in the little white bottle?
that smells like ass, that I drank at your x-mas party.

Does it explain why I crashed out on your couch for an hour or so?

What did you guys do to me while I was asleep?

Jeff(bigtikidude)

C
cynfulcynner posted on 07/11/2006

On 2006-07-10 12:32, bigtikidude wrote:
what is in that weird japanese drink, in the little white bottle?
that smells like ass, that I drank at your x-mas party.

It was probably Old Spice. REALLY Old Spice. :lol:

R
RevBambooBen posted on 07/11/2006

Dr.Z,

Why do you have long hair?

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/11/2006

On 2006-07-08 01:36, cynfulcynner wrote:

I have this sore on my naughty bits that won't heal. What should I do? :lol:

Work through the pain.

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/11/2006

On 2006-07-10 12:32, bigtikidude wrote:
Dear Dr. Z,
what is in that weird japanese drink, in the little white bottle?
that smells like ass, that I drank at your x-mas party.

Does it explain why I crashed out on your couch for an hour or so?

What did you guys do to me while I was asleep?

Jeff(bigtikidude)

Mao Tai.

Yes, it does. (If you'd had the absinthe as well, you'd probably still be out)

I don't recall exactly, but the pix are online somewhere...

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/11/2006

On 2006-07-10 23:16, RevBambooBen wrote:
Dr.Z,

Why do you have long hair?

Because I CAN! :P

R
rugbymatt posted on 07/11/2006

Dr. Z,

If a car load of Ohana leaves New York traveling at 65 mph and another car load leaves Ft. Lauderdale traveling at 70 mph which car load will get to the Catalina Tikifest first?

DS
Dr. Shocker posted on 07/11/2006


Dr.Z what did Comissioner Gordon have to say?

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/11/2006

On 2006-07-11 08:50, rugbymatt wrote:
Dr. Z,

If a car load of Ohana leaves New York traveling at 65 mph and another car load leaves Ft. Lauderdale traveling at 70 mph which car load will get to the Catalina Tikifest first?

Neither. Catalina is an island.

R
rugbymatt posted on 07/11/2006

Can't fool the Doctor!

H
Humuhumu posted on 07/11/2006

Dear Dr. Z,

How much wool will a woolchuck chuck if the woolchuck is Chuck Woolery?

Your guidance is needed,

Humuhumu

MT
Mai Tai posted on 07/13/2006

Dear Doctor Z,
What should I do when I encounter that "not so fresh feeling", especially after a night of hard core boozing? Your friend,
-Mai Tai

R
RevBambooBen posted on 07/15/2006

On 2006-07-11 08:21, Doctor Z wrote:

On 2006-07-10 23:16, RevBambooBen wrote:
Dr.Z,

Why do you have long hair?

Because I CAN! :P

You nailed it !!

Ever thought of Dreads??

G
GROG posted on 07/15/2006

Ever thought of Dreads??

Ever dread thoughts?

R
RevBambooBen posted on 07/17/2006

Mmmm. Fire Hot!!

But good!

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/18/2006

On 2006-07-11 12:45, Dr. Shocker wrote:

Dr.Z what did Comissioner Gordon have to say?

He asked me to stop calling him "Flash". :wink:

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/18/2006

On 2006-07-11 16:36, Humuhumu wrote:
Dear Dr. Z,

How much wool will a woolchuck chuck if the woolchuck is Chuck Woolery?

Your guidance is needed,

Humuhumu

That, of course, would be "Two and two"... :wink:

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/18/2006

On 2006-07-12 18:35, Mai Tai wrote:
Dear Doctor Z,
What should I do when I encounter that "not so fresh feeling", especially after a night of hard core boozing? Your friend,
-Mai Tai

Step aside and walk around it. :wink:

DZ
Doctor Z posted on 07/18/2006

On 2006-07-17 01:17, RevBambooBen wrote:
Mmmm. Fire Hot!!

But good!

Arrrrrr... :wink:

B
bigtikidude posted on 07/19/2006

What do I do when there is a surf band from the Mid west out here playing at the Surf Museum on Sun.?
But the Egyptian theater thing is happening at the same time.

Help???

Jeff(bigtikidude)

TSW
The Sperm Whale posted on 07/21/2006

Dear Doctor Z-
Have you ever had a P-Nuttle crawl out of your mouth?

Thank You in Advance,
The Sperm Whale

[ Edited by: The Sperm Whale 2006-07-20 19:01 ]

TB
Tiki Bird posted on 07/21/2006

Dear Dr. Z,

We are in dangerous times, will Captain Knee Pads return to save us!

G
GROG posted on 07/21/2006

Dear Dr. Z,
If GROG drink grog, is that considered cannibalism?

G
GROG posted on 07/21/2006

Dear Dr.Z,
On a similar note, if GROG eat humuhumu, who would be more angry Hanford
or the Hawaiian Fish and Wildlife department?

G
GROG posted on 07/21/2006

Dear Dr. Z,
One more question. Where is that proverbial line, and has GROG crossed it?

Pages: 1 2 48 replies