Post #31882 by hala bullhiki on Mon, Apr 28, 2003 9:43 PM

hala kahiki (located in river grove,il....just outside chicago)is the most fabulous tiki bar ive ever ventured into, .....one of the old school greats, i'm sure you can read plenty more about it in james "tiki road trip" bookand i'm sure sven will tell ya about their amazing witco collection......it was the the first tiki bar i ever went to years ago, and started my tiki obsession....you can go to http://www.konakai.com, and click on their link for a little more info if you like........if ya come out here for exotica2003 in august, i'm sure you'll visit there........heres james write up from the tiki bar review page:

"Opened in 1966 by Rose and Stanley Sacharski, Hala Kahiki has maintained every bit of the charm and authentic Tiki Bar feel that it has possessed since day one.  Hala Kahiki (“home of the pineapple”) is one of the best type I Tiki Bars left in the world.  It is not without flaws, but this little slice of paradise sequestered away in an unassuming little shack in the suburbs of Chicago is a real treasure.
Finding Hala Kahiki can be difficult.  It sits on a small road that runs alongside a wooded riverbed.  The nearest major intersection is a fair way off, and the street is typically not very well lit at night.  Down the road a bit is some sort of quarry.  The neighborhood is a sparsely populated residential area, mostly inhabited by the families of Polish immigrants.

Once one manages to discover the wood-planked exterior of the single story stand-alone building, there is little - save for one big Tiki mask on the wall, and a few illuminated plastic flowers - to suggest what awaits inside.  Magic.

The first thing that I always point out to people when walking into HK is the pineapple-shaped sign that says “Hala Kahiki Rules”.  Well, this sign can be taken two ways.  Hala Kahiki does, indeed, rule!  But the purpose of the sign is not to brag, but rather to remind people that there is a dress code enforced, and that beer is not served.  That’s right, Hala Kahiki serves only Tropical Drinks.  Hala Kahiki does not serve any food (except for that classic Polynesian delicacy - pretzels) and has no floor show or any entertainment at all.  What it is, in fact, is a cozy and romantic little slice of paradise, a dark and quiet place to have a drink among the Tiki Gods and spend a summer evening with your sweetie.  My guess is that more people have proposed marriage in Hala Kahiki than in any other bar or restaurant in the Chicago area.

Moving down the narrow hallway, a doorway on the right takes you into the dark and intimate Hala Kahiki. The first room one will encounter is the bar area.  The actual bar is long, and is usually empty.  It’s dozen stools are typically where people wait for their friends or dates to show up, but are almost never occupied otherwise.  Hala Kahiki is a place for good times with a group of friends, or intimate encounters with a date that you really want to impress. Lone barflies are impossible to locate, and if you are trying to meet a new prospective romance, look somewhere else.  Every one at Hala Kahiki is already with someone!   Trying to talk to the bartender is futile.  Unlike most bars, the mixologists don’t like to chat much, and they seem to prefer to hang out at the far end of the bar in order to accommodate waitresses more efficiently.

Across from the bar are four private booths.  Moving through the bar area, a waitress clad in a muumuu will ask for your ID and direct you to a table.  There are three main seating rooms, and a very large enclosed patio area (open seasonally).  There is a Witco fountain in the third (rear) room, and a larger concrete one on the patio.  Your waitress will seat you at a table of her choice (for some reason, every time I have asked for a certain table, I have been denied!), and present you with an exhaustive drink menu.  The menu also provides a handy glossary of useful Hawaiian words.

All of the usual Tropical Drinks are here, and plenty of new libations as well. There are 95 drinks on the menu.  The drinks are reasonable in price, particularly compared to Trader Vic’s or the Mai Kai.  Most of them range from $4 to $7.  However, you might want to stick to the few drinks marked “strong” when ordering.  This is because Hala kahiki prefers to keep their potables on the less potent side.  The “strong” drinks are, by most Tiki Bar aficionado standards, about average in strength.

Unfortunately, one of the chief complaints about Hala Kahiki is the quality of these drinks.  The most popular of them are poured pre-mixed from plastic jugs.  We would very much prefer if they were made fresh.  Until recently, many of the drinks were served in Tiki Mugs, mostly modern versions based on vintage Orchids of Hawaii designs.  A few drinks still are served this way, but for the most part, you will get your drink in a regular glass, typically of either hurricane, collins, or flute variety.  None of the drinks that still come in a Tiki Mug allow you to keep your mug, but you can buy a decent selection of them in the gift shop (usually $8-$12).

The gift shop, in the back of the building is open until at least 10:00 (except on Sunday and Monday), and offers a wide range of Hawaiiana.  There is plenty to see.  You can even pick up woven grass mats to use in your own Tiki Bar decor, and there is a HUGE selection of Muumuus and Hawaiian shirts.

The atmosphere at Hala Kahiki is one of sophistication and quiet.  People seldom raise their voices, the music is kept at a low level, and there isn't a TV in sight.  The musical selections are typically traditional Hawaiian music, piped in from a CD changer locked up under the bar.  Occasionally, the Hawaiian music will vanish to be replaced by more contemporary hits; Madonna was on when I was there in June, 2000, while Cher and Britney were being piped in the following time.  This is a trend I would like to see squashed as quickly as possible - the traditional music is a key ingredient!

The decor of Hala Kahiki is largely beyond reproach and without equal for a place of it’s size.  The low ceiling and dim lights provide a cozy and romantic atmosphere.  The only windows in the entire building are the ones that look out onto the patio.  HK has one of the highest TiPSY™ Factors I have ever seen, and not a one of the many Tiki objects on display has been defaced with the bright colors seen on “Disney Tikis”.  There are many, many pieces from Witco at Hala Kahiki; some autorities claim that they have the best surviving Wiyco collection anywhere.  Some of the other classic Tiki Bar decor providers (such as Oceanic Arts) are represented as well. All of the usual accouterments are present - blowfish, floats, nets, bamboo for miles, and other nautical curiosities - but this should be a given by now.

One can spend hours perusing Hala Kahiki and still notice cool details in the decor - the row of small blowfish above the bar, the leopard skin trim in the entranceway, the half dozen huge Tikis on the patio - you’ll keep noticing great details all night long.

The best time to visit Hala Kahiki is on a weeknight.  Due to the growth of the Tiki Fad in the past few years, HK is pretty jammed on the weekends.  I have even seen lines outside to get in.  So far, I have never had any sort of wait to get a table on a weeknight.
 

   Hala Kahiki gets a perfect Five Tikis (out of a possible Five), but loses one Tiki for weak drinks, and those inflatable pink plastic easter bunnies they put on the patio every spring. "

[ Edited by: hala bullhiki on 2003-04-28 21:47 ]