Post #41971 by Chongolio on Mon, Jul 7, 2003 12:16 PM

Here is a few I have picked up over the years from many an ol folk:

For something slippery:
"That thing is slicker than a goose turd on the pump handle."

Regarding idiots:
"There are three types of people, those who can count and those who cannot."

When astounded:
"What in the wide wide wide world of sports is going on here?" or " what on god's great green planet is going on here?"

For trips to the terlet:
" I have to drop the Waltons off at the pond." or for a dude finishing up:
"Shakin the dew off the lily"

For descibing the not so beautiful:
"That girl is uglier that a mud fence" or " she must be part indian and part chinese...ugh-lee"

For describing the good lookin:
She is so fine, I would drink here bathwater.

And my favorite for describing something that was a bad idea:

The dogs kennel is no place to keep a sausage.

Chongolio