Post #43396 by Tiki_Bong on Thu, Jul 17, 2003 2:21 PM

As I pondered one day, in a semi-conscious state, I thought (this is me thinking now), "hey, tiki has everything one needs to have a great time. It's got drink, food, collections, music, dance, life-style, folklore, massive hangovers, and hotties wearing very little in and around their private parts".

What other hobby is both a life-style and a direct frontal assault on the liver? None.

I mean I've made more friends in the last year than I've lost (by at least a 2 to 1 ratio mind you). And the friends I lost were all due to horrific barbeque accidents, and not my drunken boorish behavior.

When I thought back on the last year of tiki happenings, I found that I couldn't. What the hell, Freud said we only use 10% of our brain, so why not waste the other 90%?

I mean I saw pictures of me drinking at very early hours of the morning, mid-morning, late-morning, noon, mid-noon, late-noon, and night, mid-night(?), and late night at Tiki Oasis and other memory-deleting events. Pictures of me acting like a dork wearing a lava lava and a dumb-ass hat/lampshade, but it all seemed like a fuzzy dream.

(unfortunately, the stroke-like hangovers are extremely vivid, much like surgery sans anesthesia.)

Now when I go into Liquor Warehouse and buy my booze, I notice the clerks calling home to make sure none of their loved ones will be driving anywhere in Orange County that night. I consider it my little contribution to traffic congestion reduction!

Anyway, I just wanted to note what a terrific thing caucasians have done by taking a sacred belief of the polynesians and bastardizing it into their own personally alcohol-fueled form of self-gratification.

Alohahahahahahahahahahahahahah!