Things You've Learned From Movies & TV - Bilge

A aquarj Tiki Socialite SF bay area, CA Joined: Apr 02, 2002 Posts: 1125	A aquarj Posted posted on Tue, Mar 6, 2012 11:48 PM Female Russian spies are universally smart, sexy, and extremely passionate lovers. That's the field agents though. Any female boss back at the home station looks like an angry toad. Phone repair men are never really phone repair men. When you're infiltrating some kind of compound with uniformed guards, it's enough cover to just use one of their uniforms. You might think the other guards know each other well because that's the only human contact they get in otherwise dreary jobs. But you can still proceed and safely assume that no one will think it's odd that they don't recognize you. If you're going to beam down to a planet, make sure there's at least one person in the visiting party of lower rank (and with fewer lines) than you. If you love football, but you're shorter, slower, and more clumsy than everyone already on the team, don't let that bother you. Just persevere and someday you'll get your chance on the team and win the big game. If you want to acquire a new skill, play an upbeat song and perform little snippets of gradual improvement. You'll be an expert in no time. If you're receiving some form of witness protection, give your guardians a hard time and constantly try to give them the slip. Self-preservation is boring. If the bad guys capture you for questioning, give them a lot of snotty remarks and insults. They might beat the crap out of you, but they can't take away the pleasure you'll get from a few choice zingers. Again, self-preservation is boring. If you're any kind of law enforcement and about to retire, and you're called out to ONE LAST active crime scene involving any kind of violent offender, go for it. Don't just take the rest of the day off instead. Sure that nice pension is waiting, but again, self-preservation is boring. Everyone aged 18-25 from 1967 to 1970 was drugged out the entire time, with no memory whatsoever of their activity during those years. Not a single person in that age group was living a normal productive life. Before 1970, all cars on the road were spotless. Wives always figure out the stupid secret plans their husbands have made, through the force of pure intuition alone. But they always forgive the big lunks after they own up and apologize. -Randy

Female Russian spies are universally smart, sexy, and extremely passionate lovers. That's the field agents though. Any female boss back at the home station looks like an angry toad.

Phone repair men are never really phone repair men.

When you're infiltrating some kind of compound with uniformed guards, it's enough cover to just use one of their uniforms. You might think the other guards know each other well because that's the only human contact they get in otherwise dreary jobs. But you can still proceed and safely assume that no one will think it's odd that they don't recognize you.

If you're going to beam down to a planet, make sure there's at least one person in the visiting party of lower rank (and with fewer lines) than you.

If you love football, but you're shorter, slower, and more clumsy than everyone already on the team, don't let that bother you. Just persevere and someday you'll get your chance on the team and win the big game.

If you want to acquire a new skill, play an upbeat song and perform little snippets of gradual improvement. You'll be an expert in no time.

If you're receiving some form of witness protection, give your guardians a hard time and constantly try to give them the slip. Self-preservation is boring.

If the bad guys capture you for questioning, give them a lot of snotty remarks and insults. They might beat the crap out of you, but they can't take away the pleasure you'll get from a few choice zingers. Again, self-preservation is boring.

If you're any kind of law enforcement and about to retire, and you're called out to ONE LAST active crime scene involving any kind of violent offender, go for it. Don't just take the rest of the day off instead. Sure that nice pension is waiting, but again, self-preservation is boring.

Everyone aged 18-25 from 1967 to 1970 was drugged out the entire time, with no memory whatsoever of their activity during those years. Not a single person in that age group was living a normal productive life.

Before 1970, all cars on the road were spotless.

Wives always figure out the stupid secret plans their husbands have made, through the force of pure intuition alone. But they always forgive the big lunks after they own up and apologize.

-Randy

Post #627933 by aquarj on Tue, Mar 6, 2012 11:48 PM