The Cause of Baldness

[removed by hanford]

[ Edited by: hanford_lemoore on 2003-08-26 02:01 ]

Hairguy, I, umm, this post, ummm.....

I'm speechless....

I discovered the cause for me breaking my foot off in someone's ass. it's called SPAMMING

Perhaps he worded it wrong. Maybe he meant to say this:

I discovered the CAUSE of tiki fever in April of 1996 when my apartment looked like a normal dwelling. I've cluttered up more than 60 percent of my available space in the last 7 years. THERE'S NOTHING TO BUY, EXCEPT THAT ELUSIVE STEVE CRANE BIRD AND A MAUNA LOA MUG. AND A TIKI BOB. The CAUSE of tiki fever is acid in tiki soap-on-a-rope and shampoo (he was right about this part). Just change the way you cleanse your hair and scalp with your present shampoo, and soon your home will return to it's normal Pottery Barn showroom state.

My family finally believed me early last year, 2002. Like most, they had thought "tiki fever" and "coco nuttiness" were a fallacy. No more. Now, they're regrowing their apartment space by minimizing shampoo and tiki soap-on-a-rope usage.

Read a very thorough examination of the subject at http://www.tikicentral.com. That is NOT proof but a suggested formal Test at Colleges could easily be done, repeated several times, and published in Sven's Journals. That would result in further independent testing. Testing may or may not include drinking too many Mai Tai's and showing off your coconuts.

On 2003-08-25 14:56, hairguy wrote:
I've regrown more than 60 percent of my hair in the last 7 years

Unfortunately, it wasn't on his head though.

On 2003-08-25 14:56, hairguy wrote:
Like most, they had thought "male pattern baldness"

On the contrary, you have "Male Pattern Brainless".

On 2003-08-25 15:08, suicide_sam wrote:
I discovered the cause for me breaking my foot off in someone's ass. it's called SPAMMING

Thanks sam, I nearly fell off my feckin' chair!

:lol;,
em.

Actually all you have to do is stand on your head twice a day for 10 minutes, once in the morning and once in the evening. You will then see the hair growing back. What happens is that the gland at the top of your head overproduces male hormones therefore blocking the blood from the roots of the hair. By standing on your head this helps the blood flow back to the roots. :D :lol:

If you believe that....I'vegotsome oceanfront propertee in AiriiZoneah, from my front porch you can see the sea

[ Edited by: jungletrader on 2003-08-25 17:57 ]

[ Edited by: jungletrader on 2003-08-25 18:23 ]

[ Edited by: jungletrader on 2003-08-25 20:43 ]

Society is too hung up on their 'hair'. When (and if) mine starts to go I'm not gonna do the swoop, rug or any other funky lame-ass looking remedy. I'm just gonna shave it high & tight!

If one's most important feature is their hair...

Do you have any idea why the palm of my hand is so hairy??

Thanks Hairguy,

I thought the problem was my ripping it out in desperation over the stupidity of the human race! Either that or the spam fat I rub on my head each morning...

I wash my body with soap.... does that mean that if I didn't, I'd be even more hairy than I already am?!

WHAT THE??????

We have long had spam on Tiki Central but this one hits a new low. On a relevance rating of 1-10 this is a ZERO.

Sheesh

On 2003-08-25 18:09, Tiki_Bong wrote:
Society is too hung up on their 'hair'. When (and if) mine starts to go I'm not gonna do the swoop, rug or any other funky lame-ass looking remedy. I'm just gonna shave it high & tight!

If one's most important feature is their hair...

Ditto Bong. My grandpa used to say, "If it was important, it'd be growing INSIDE your head."

:), em

But I always thought that if I went bald it would surely be a sign; I was then allowed to divorce my wife, go buy a Miata and one Moody Blues CD, start dating a dumb 23 year-old beauty contestant, and have the priveledge of wearing the official old fart-in-mid-life crisis uniform (1)penny loafers with no socks (2) bad knit golf shirts (3)some Woolrich khaki shorts with one of those cute woven leather belts (4) a Greg Norman style straw hat (5) at least one piece of flashy gold jewelry. (note): These aps apply to some baldness but mostly newfound impotence.

[ Edited by: Basement Kahuna on 2003-08-25 23:44 ]

On 2003-08-25 23:41, Basement Kahuna wrote:
I was then allowed to divorce my wife, go buy a Miata

Hey, watch it! :)

--cynner, owner of the Famous Grinning Miata