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Tiki Central 101

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Because I've noticed quite a few new members here at Tiki Central, I thought it would be beneficial to provide a list of DO's & DON'Ts regarding the posting of messages that I've learned (sometimes the hard way) during my stay:

  1. Never, repeat, NEVER, inquire as to whether someone can be a teetotaler and still be into tiki and all that it involves.

  2. Refrain from making statements like this - 'never use the term 'surf' for anything other than actually 'surfing'.

  3. Never talk about the new release of 'Ultra Lounge'.

  4. Do not imply that REAL Falernum MUST have a small percentage of alcohol in it or it's bogus.

  5. Never make any statements about who really invented the Mai Tai (unless the answer is Trader Vic).

I hope the above tips help you to enjoy Tiki Central as much as I do (damn it!).

T

Also:

  • Never, ever poke fun at Catholics.

  • Racist jokes are strictly taboo, unless you're making fun of the Germans, in which case, it's no holds barred.

  • Jimmy Buffet is best not discussed in mixed company.

don't suggest copying someone else's art and offering it for sale is justifiable under any circumstances.

Oh yes, and don't suggest you would feel even the slightest discomfort at a males only, clothing optional tiki resort.

T
thejab posted on Fri, Sep 6, 2002 1:44 PM

Speaking of taboos, another rule:
Never talk about Taboo Cove!

On 2002-09-06 10:42, Tiki_Bong wrote:
5) Never make any statements about who really invented the Mai Tai (unless the answer is Trader Vic).

What are you talking about? Al Gore invented the Mai Tai, right after he created the Internet. Show some respect, here! :wink:

What good is any forum if there's no spirited debate? Controversial statements get the brain's juices flowing(so to speak).
I'm glad we're still allowed to make fun of the Germans. Otherwise my German ancestry would be less of a source of entertainment.
So here goes:Taboo Cove RULES!

In this list of DO's and DON'Ts I only see DON'Ts. What are the DO's?

On 2002-09-06 14:28, Biotron2000 wrote:

On 2002-09-06 10:42, Tiki_Bong wrote:
5) Never make any statements about who really invented the Mai Tai (unless the answer is Trader Vic).

What are you talking about? Al Gore invented the Mai Tai, right after he created the Internet. Show some respect, here! :wink:

No,no,no it was right after he finished his tour in 'Nam, when he heard about a Texan Air National Guardsman who skipped out on the last 6 months of his tour of duty.
DON'T FORGET, NO POLITICS!!!!
TG
http://www.exotic-tiki-gardens.com

[ Edited by: TikiGardener on 2002-09-06 23:16 ]

Never say;
Sophisticated
Kitsch
Hedonistic Defunct
Inherent
Physically
Gratifying
Oceanic
Sleek
Modernism
Uniqueness
Mysterious
Haloes
Spiritual
Onslaught
Dichotomy
Devout
Seditious
Iconography
Eccentric
Embraced
Vernacular
Devotion
Exploitation
Romanticize
Mindset
Justifying
Ephemera
Progression
Denouncing
Phenomenon
Comprehended
OR
Euphonious
In only two paragraphs, it has to be at least three

DO NOT overly discuss hooters...
Unless they are on a tiki, tiki mug, tiki bar sign, matchbook of a tiki bar or similar establishment, on a tiki-related painting, regarding traditional hula dancing, or clothes optional tiki resorts.
:skeckymug:
-C.

(Oh com'on. No one should be surprised I said that! If it wasnt me, it would have been Kokomo!)

don't forget SPAM!

T

You want DO's here are a couple:

DO describe tiki bars with words such as
tacky,
kitchy,
quirky,
cutesy,
fun,
playful,
and my alltime favorite, retro!

DO answer long discussions with replies such as:
I agree,
cool,
me too!,
etc.

T

MORE DO'S

-The Combover
-The Mullet
-The Elvis
-The Kojak
-The Beehive

I have no problem with the discussion of hooters since I am the proud owner of two myself. :wink:

Yes- hooray for hooters! Especially if they're tiki-friendly and can occasionaly be covered with half coconut shells on a string.

H

I bought a coconut bra, and it makes me look like a twelve year old boy. It sounds impossible -- but who would make that up? Seriously bummed me out.

hey man,
I don't care what you say but you can't disparage SPAM, man!Peoples jobs here depend on it. Everyone thinks i'm conservative because I don't have long hair. My Dad fought the Nazis man so we all could be free to speak our minds!

Your incoherent friend,
Slovak

Cool, jab! Mullets? come on now people. Are you trying to drive me to suicide?

On 2002-09-07 21:24, Humuhumu wrote:
I bought a coconut bra, and it makes me look like a twelve year old boy. It sounds impossible -- but who would make that up? Seriously bummed me out.

I don't suppose you have pictures of that.(Sorry, seriously un-P.C.)Please don't kick me off the forum.

Do let others know when you'll be traveling to their locale to visit famed tiki establishments.

Never suggest, nay never even mention a certain drink made with Tequilla, limes, salt, and triplesec.
Wrathful indignation may follow.
TG
http://www.exotic-tiki-gardens.com

Hey Slovak,

If you ever come out to LA, you and Atomic Cocktail should have a SPAM-fest. You both seem to have a great love of the product and it's history.

I oughta know since we were just having dinner tonight when Atomic overheard some people at the next table dissing SPAM. One (obviously spoiled) young woman went so far as to say that she wouldn't eat SPAM even if she was literally starving. Atomic just rolled his eyes at her naivete.

He would've thrown her into the volcano had there been one nearby.

BB

I'd like to see someone piss off Atomic at the Bahooka!! To see him trying to cram some poor saps head into one of those "Volcano Dessert" things, would be insane!!! When is the L.A. mini crawl??

Yeah...when IS the L.A. mini-crawl?

On 2002-09-09 10:47, floratina wrote:
Yeah...when IS the L.A. mini-crawl?

Hey Flora, lets organize one! But we will need some BIG volcanos for stuffing-and SPAM!


ANYONE SEEN MY DAD?

[ Edited by: Atomic Cocktail on 2002-09-10 10:23 ]

And Hooters! Hey, howabout SPAM Hooters?

On 2002-09-10 10:25, Atomic Cocktail wrote:
And Hooters! Hey, howabout SPAM Hooters?

Any chance of Spam meat free substitute hooters for us vegetarians?

[i]On 2002-09-11 08:40, TikiGardener wrote:
Any chance of Spam meat free substitute hooters for us vegetarians?

Tofutti Hooters anyone?

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