Spreading the Tiki Gospel, 1 Soul at a Time

I think I've found something as exciting as finding a Don the Beachcomber bust mug at Goodwill for $2, and that is - turning tiki lovers onto Tiki Central.

It's happened twice in the last month or so. This weekend I was at Ace Hardware, proudly wearing my Tiki Central T-Shirt. The gal behind the counter said 'Tiki Central? huh, me and my husband like tikis'.

Then at that very moment a wave of excitement came over me as I extolled the virtues of Tiki Central and all things tiki.

Her face lit up as though I'd pulled her out of the depths of hell and into tiki salvation. We made an instant connection to Tiki, it was as though we were siblings separated at birth, and just found each other in the 10 items or less line.

There were other people waiting in line, but at the moment it didn't matter to me or her. I proudly professed our members such as the Reverend Bamboo Ben, The high Priest Sven, the Alter Boy Baxdog. The old lady behind me in line listened to my tale of tiki salvation and muttered something to the effect 'I thought there was a separation of church and hardware store!'.

I felt as though I had received a devine calling, as thought the clouds parted and the booming voice of Ku called to me 'go forth Bong and spread my message of all things tiki - and how to mix a kick-ass Mai Tai!'

I think I'm going to print up a bunch of little booklets and call them 'The Tiki Watchtower' and go door to door at really annoying times of the day, and preach the gospel of TIKI. I want to say things like "YOU ARE HEALED!".

I always wondered if I was on Ku's green Earth for a reason, and now I know...

Excellent work brother Bong. If only we had the resources to leave a Book of Tiki on the porch of every home that has a tiki torch or wooden idol on display. Perhaps your Watchtower pamplet idea could become some sort of official Tiki Central flyer which we could all use to spread the gospel.

Didn't someone print up a bunch of little 'Chick' booklets about the EVILS of Tiki? I've not seen one myself, so I'm not sure if it's a parody or the real thing.

Trader Woody

I was at the gym today reading the Book of Tiki during my cardio, since I've only read portions of it, and I was attacked. 5 people asked me what I was reading. One guy asked if I was taking a class at the University on the subject! I always read when I'm on the cardio machines, noone has ever asked me what I was reading.

4 of them wrote down the title and author. I let them look at it while I finished up. They had lots of questions but I had to get out of there.

I told them to buy it on Amazon and to visit us on Tiki Central.

I'm spreading the word!

That is so funny! Maybe I should suggest this as a marketing strategy to Taschen...
sorta like a new fitness fad.

Wait! I got it. It's the "look up in the sky" psychological effect:
EVERYBODY: Take THE BOOK to public places and read it intently. Do not get distracted and do not react untill at least TEN people have gathered around you and demand to know where they can get it. Then tell those people to do the same!

I spread the word of Tiki whenever I can, wherever I can. I share the experience of the Book of Tiki with all my friends and associates.

But I think we are missing a cry for help here. Clearly, Bong is losing his mind. Ever since Joe's Aloha closed, Bong has gotten more and more "colorful" with his postings! Visiting Joe's shop was Tiki therapy for him, and now that it is gone, he has no local place to vent his Tiki frustrations! It won't be long before he becomes the phantom Tiki hermit, living and lurking in the loft spaces at Oceanic Arts, taunting and tormenting their customers!

My advice: Humor him! Encourage his behavior! Not only is it entertaining for us to share in his Tiki insanity, but think of the potential media coverage! He may become the Tiki equivalent of the Laguna Beach Greeter! Hollywood's Angeline! Or, better yet, the Huell Howser of Tiki!

GO BONG, GO!!!!!

:tiki:

The Huell Howser of Tiki....hmmm, that's actually pretty funny! However, Huell is fascinated about the stuff he is clueless about. Bong is just simply clueless....:)

TraderPup,

I think you're right, and so do I. As a matter of fact I, and so was I, was at Oceanic Arts just yesterday.