Post #19260 by Tiki_Bong on Mon, Jan 13, 2003 9:16 AM

I think I've found something as exciting as finding a Don the Beachcomber bust mug at Goodwill for $2, and that is - turning tiki lovers onto Tiki Central.

It's happened twice in the last month or so. This weekend I was at Ace Hardware, proudly wearing my Tiki Central T-Shirt. The gal behind the counter said 'Tiki Central? huh, me and my husband like tikis'.

Then at that very moment a wave of excitement came over me as I extolled the virtues of Tiki Central and all things tiki.

Her face lit up as though I'd pulled her out of the depths of hell and into tiki salvation. We made an instant connection to Tiki, it was as though we were siblings separated at birth, and just found each other in the 10 items or less line.

There were other people waiting in line, but at the moment it didn't matter to me or her. I proudly professed our members such as the Reverend Bamboo Ben, The high Priest Sven, the Alter Boy Baxdog. The old lady behind me in line listened to my tale of tiki salvation and muttered something to the effect 'I thought there was a separation of church and hardware store!'.

I felt as though I had received a devine calling, as thought the clouds parted and the booming voice of Ku called to me 'go forth Bong and spread my message of all things tiki - and how to mix a kick-ass Mai Tai!'

I think I'm going to print up a bunch of little booklets and call them 'The Tiki Watchtower' and go door to door at really annoying times of the day, and preach the gospel of TIKI. I want to say things like "YOU ARE HEALED!".

I always wondered if I was on Ku's green Earth for a reason, and now I know...