Jokes (some good, some stupid)

One day an old German Shepherd starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a mountain lion heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch. The old German Shepherd thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep trouble now!" Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the mountain lion is about to leap, the old German Shepherd exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious mountain lion! I wonder, if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the young mountain lion halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. "Whew!," says the panther, "That was close! That old German Shepherd nearly had me!"

Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the mountain lion. So, off he goes. The squirrel soon catches up with the mountain lion, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the big cat. The young mountain lion is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"

Now, the old German Shepherd sees the mountain lion coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old German Shepherd says... "Where's that damn squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another mountain lion!"

Moral of this story? Don't mess with the old dogs... Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery!

Q: What do dogs and Southern girls have in common?

A: They both like to lick their paw.