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Beyond Tiki, Bilge, and Test / Beyond Tiki

what a drag it is getting old

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Crap, I'm 40 today
Not fishing for birthday well wishes, just thought I'd share how weird it feels to be turning 40.
I always thought I would feel ...different. y'know ....like all grown up & stuff.
I still feel like the same dork that I've always been.
But, I have noticed some changes:
20 year old girls dont look at me the same way.
People seem to call me 'sir' alot more often.
Hangovers seem to take 2-3 days to recover from vs. the the 'ol standard 12-24 hrs.
I catch myself telling stories that happened 20 years ago & thinking it was 5-10 years ago.
I dont always want to go out every weekend to rage & party it up like I used to.
I put on 20 lbs & cant seem to lose it.
I don't listen to the stereo cranked up loud as hell.
I catch myself prefacing my stories to my nieces & nephews with "y'know things were alot different when I was a kid..."
I dont recover from injury nearly as fast.
I have a harder time relating to rap & hip hop music.
I feel an overwhelming urge to get a new tattoo, pierce something & buy a corvette.

A BigBadHappyTikiBirtday to you BBTD!!!!
Sorry I won't see ya' tonite but there's always a stool for ya' in The Aloha Room.
Happy Bithday buddy.
Aloha,
:tiki:

Thank you brother Shep!
You are my homeboy forever.
btw- you did mean bar stool, yes?

D

No,really it's great to be over forty!Happy birthday,by the way-it's my husband's birthday also.Yes,there are drawbacks-(weight,yea)but you wouldn't want to be a naive young thing anymore,either.Think of yourself as fine wine-and have a terrific birthday!

On 2005-05-23 15:09, bigbadtikidaddy wrote:
I feel an overwhelming urge to get a new tattoo, pierce something & buy a corvette.

You don't want a Corvette, you want a Miata! :)
Happy birthday! (Does Shari know?)

On 2005-05-23 15:27, bigbadtikidaddy wrote:
Thank you brother Shep!
You are my homeboy forever.
btw- you did mean bar stool, yes?

Happy Birthday!! And, as a 48-year old - I can say that, on my list, is the sudden joy found in being - uh - "regular" in the aforementioned "stool" department - and I DON'T necessarily mean the bar variety! At 20 it just didn't seem to be an issue!

On 2005-05-23 16:30, PapeToaTane wrote:

sudden joy found in being - uh - "regular" in the aforementioned "stool" department - and I DON'T necessarily mean the bar variety! At 20 it just didn't seem to be an issue!

TMI! TMI! Aaaaaagh! :lol:

I turned 39 on Sunday, and Mr. Pineapple and I went 'into the city' to see a Giants game and enjoy the weather. We were really amazed at how we're either turning into really cranky old people, or everyone else is just plain rude.
We sat through the game, with excellent seats, which he paid some bucks for, and the couple 2 rows in front of us let their 2 kids jump around and obstruct my view of 1st base the WHOLE game. Then there was a guy smoking cigarettes in his seat, until an usher FINALY came down and told him stop. And then (this is the part where we feel really old) On the Ferry back to Oakland, a couple near us on the boat, were climbing all over each other, SUCKING face, (I'm talking, like two 16 year olds in the corner at the dance, sloppy, tongues out, slurping noises...) They weren't kids, just oblivious to the fact that they were in public, and in a very well lit space. SHEEEEZE.

I felt really old and cranky, the physical failings I attribute more to being 6 months pregnant, but the cranky-ness is just old.

Happy Birthday!

Mrs. Pineapple

T

Seem to be a few of us in this boat right around now. I was thinking of announcing my 40th (!) a few days ago (May 20) too. May 1965, holy cow. I wonder if we put together a "bell curve" of the ages of TCers ... hey! Let's ... NOT! Anyway, hanging out with you hip cats from the old school, even if just in the virtual realm thus far, is a kind of gift, and I appreciate it. But if we ever meet, and you are younger than me, PLEASE don't call me "sir"! And bigbadtikidaddy, as I am 3 days older than you, I will of course expect to be treated in an appropriately deferential manner (hardy har har). Anyway, cheers! Forty is the new ... forty.

Im cracking 36 which is certainly not a milestone but its interesting to see how differently I am treated even though I dont see myself any differently.

I still see myself as a person who is more or less is interested in the same sorts of stuff I was when I was 20(unless Im just lying to myself).

I still can appreciate a cool car and dont have to drive the responsible vehicle. I still like to have a fun and festive decor at home and dont feel the need to do it crate and barrel style with all beige walls just so that I can fit in with the grown up crowd.

I still blast my music although I do play a little less of the hard stuff. We still enjoy campy movies and pop culture. I think that my story is similar for many of us here on TC.

I am guessing that a primary reason that so many of us keep coming back to TC is because we have finally found a large group that can appreciate our offbeat interests and not judge us adversly for them.

I know that most of us dont live tiki day in and day out but its probably safe to say that there arent as many golf fans and nordstrom shoppers in our group as you might find in wholesome suburbia. Our first interest of the day is NOT checking on our stock portfolio (although Im sure that some of us have one).

Going to Disneyland is NOT just for kids or people who have kids.

Doing something fun on a Wednesday night is NOT against the rules simply because you have to work tomorrow.

Being artistic is a valued thing instead viewed as an interference with your "career".

Where Trivia is not as trivial as much of the adult world would have us beleive.

Playing an instrument is something that you do as an adult for personal growth and enjoyment. Its not just something you are forced to do when in junior high and high school.

We have all learned that having a hobby(ies) is important to our lives.

Many of us have discovered that there is a slick coolness in being a nerd.

I for one have learned to embrace that there is more to life than obligation. Its easy to Get up, Go to work, Go home, Eat dinner, go to sleep, pay your mortgage, pay your phone bill, shop for groceries, do your laundry, contribute to your 401k and then start it all over again. Having fun and being enriched takes effort.

Happy Birthday.

H
hewey posted on Mon, May 23, 2005 5:57 PM

Hey man - Happy Birthday

Age has nothing to do with it. My mate and i act too old for our age - 22. We listen to rootsy blues, don't like the whole club/dancing scene, just like a pub with a band and good chat, don't like young wanker who insist on getting waaaay drunk etc. Its like we're 60 or something. Oh yeh, we also have a short temperement for people with bad behaviour.

Cool things about being over 40:

Parties thrown by your fellow over-40ers are more fun. Really.

Most people I know over 40 are more relaxed than the under-40ers.

People over 40 tend to be more interesting than people under 40. Subjective, I know.

People over 40 tend to have more money and things. Like, "oh, please feel free to use my vacation home in Palm Springs next time you're there." Or "why don't you fly on down with us to Baha next weekend?" My last such invitation from a wealthy friend was for my wife and I to go with her to her house in Barcelona next winter, where she goes to inspect her family's properties each year.

Truly beautiful -- as opposed to just plain cute -- women don't hit their most beautiful years until they're in their forties. Classic beauty -- true beauty -- cannot sit properly upon a young girl's face.

People in their 40s and 50s are in their most powerful years in bussiness, academe, etc. In positions of control. In positions of getting things done. That's fun. Real fun.

You do get smarter as you get older. Of course, we've all known 80 year olds who behave as children, but if you're willing to let life speak to you, you really will become a better, smarter person.

bigbadtikidaddy, I know it's a shocker to notice that the young babes aren't giving you the once-over anymore. My advice is to embrace being 40. Draw confidence from your successes and let your failures make you even tougher. And now knowing, as you surely must after 40 years of life, that nothing is for keeps and each marker on the road is not the end-all and be-all but just another marker, savor the fact that you are now a full-grown man. I know this might sound counterintuitive, but babes, even young hot babes, prefer grown-up men to boys, even pretty boys, and if you have the slightest modicum of humor to throw in the mix, you'll be getting more action than you ever dreamed possible.

Providing, of course, you don't trip over your cane on your way to the clubs!



Don't get on the ship! Don't get on the ship!

[ Edited by: Satan's Sin on 2005-05-23 18:15 ]

Heck women stopped looking at me when I was about 30. By that time every one of them in the neighborhood knew I had a girlfriend of 5 years. Now its going on 15 years. I think that much time involved induces whiplash in "other women".

Although it is odd hearing the occasional new employee react to my age when they ask.
Somehow hearing them say that they thought I was 30 is pleasing. I cringe thinking that last sentence over.

Dear John,
You need to inhale deep, then crank up the stereo, cuz the music is still good, the women are still beautiful, the grass is still green, the crickets still sing, and you're NOT pushin' daisies....YET....okay, now you can beat the crap out of me. wtf, I'm 50, and I'm still crazy too. Live it up brah!

OH, Happy Birthday!!

[ Edited by: Jungle Trader on 2005-05-23 21:35 ]

BBTD, Very Happy Birthday wishes to you. Don't sweat 40 - you're still cool to me.

Mrs. Pineapple, Very Happy Birthday wishes to you too. As someone turning 37 this year, I totally relate to everything you said!

B

Happy birthday, and welcome to the big 4-0 club. I joined in February. I don't mind being invisable to younger women, but it does cause some embarrassing moments when we bump into each other. I knew I was "middle aged" when a coworker asked what the hell I was doing with cuffs on my jeans, and I replied, "they are denim chinos, not jeans." When your body changes, so does your wardrobe.

bbtd, revel in the 4-0, it's never to soon to be a crotchety old man :)

Mrs. Pineapple GiantRobotTiki and I were in San Francisco/Oakland this last weekend too! Celebrating his 40th. Small world! The weather was fantastic wasn't it! I did manage to squeeze in Trader Vic's even though it was his special weekend!

Now on topic, well the model isn't as bright and shiny and doesn't quite work as well as it did when it was first driven off the show-room floor. And looking back, at 20, I certainly thought I knew it all. The old saying "Youth is Wasted on the Youth" makes a lot sense now. However, now that the big four-0 is rapid approaching for me too, I've come to realize that I really don't know *HIT. I've come to appreciate that my physical age isn't quite so important as the knowledge and wisdom I've gained in getting older.

I would not exchange any experience, good or bad. The culmination of so many factors, experiences, people who have touched my life, influences, mistakes, (I've made some BIG ones) have transformed me from a timid, excruciatingly quiet girl to what I am today. It's been a process, but I can honestly say that I like ME and I'm happy.

Don't sweat it man! Growing old doesn't suck. Worrying about it does!

A few years ago, I was goofing around with some friends and I let them chew on this question. I asked, "Would you trade in 10 or 15 years of your life to look 10 or 15 years younger?

Happy birthday Bigbadtikidaddy, and all the others!
I've noticed, reading other postings where people listed their ages, that some of you are younger than the amount of years that I have been married. ( to the same man no less...)
For me the worst thing about getting older is that I find myself packing on the pounds, and it's harder to work on getting them off due to hip pain, back pain,knee pain etc etc, etc....ha ha. ha
All caused by dumb things I did in my youth.

I guess I'm an anomoly of the 20 something women category. For a number of years now, I've been really content dating guys much older than me. The young and often self centered don't do for me anymore. My wonderful boyfriend of 3 years just turned 43. And what is really great is the age gap goes away. However, he does love to brag that he's dating a girl 14 years younger than him.

But I too feel older than my physical age. Had to grow up a little to fast I suppose.

It seems getting older is not what it used to be perceived as, at least when we all were kids. That's a major change in our culture and y'all should take credit for that. Y'all with a few more years have much to say from what you've experienced. It the real deal that is honest and genuine. That mean plenty!

Feel good about yourselves 40 somethings. I love y'all lots.

Hey everyone, thanks for the well wishes, it truly means alot.
I'm recovering nicely from yesterdays hangover & it was cool to read the replies to this post.
Honestly, I'm cool with getting older.
It's just that some elements are easier to reconcile than others...
I think I'll start with changing my diet & getting some more exercise.
I reckon I'll work through it!

a few replies:
Cynner- Shari actually sent me a card...she never forgets. And you know I already have the Miata & I'm keepin it baby!

mrs. pineapple- Happy belated birthday! Enjoy whats left of your 30's while you can!

Hey tropicalguy, best wishes & happy 40th birthday to you! I once worked at a restaurant & there were 3 other people with the same BD as me. I always thought that was kind of odd. (birds of a feather or some such)

Satan's Sin- Wow, I liked your take on things & I really appreciate your positive attitude!

Vic- I feel ya brother. Shit, I just hope I look half as good as you when I'm 50!

Pop- thanks, right back at ya.

Benehune- Happy belated 4-0 to you!

CheekyGirl sez:"Growing old doesn't suck. Worrying about it does!"
-Amen sister.

exotica59- oy, dont get me started on the aches & pains.

I dream of tiki- I need you to convert all your young girlfriends to your way of thinking. Then they can tell two friends, & so on, & so on...

Place a big wet one on this cutie, and you'lle feel like a spring chicken.
Happy Birthday!

T

Happy Belated Birthday!!!!
I have nothing smart-assed to say for once. Just, uh, happy birthday!

And I thought I was old!!! For some reason, I'm still gettin looks from hot 20 something year-old girls... well, at least the one's I think are hot (I like'm a little thick, dig?)

[ Edited by: FreakBear on 2005-05-28 22:59 ]

bigbadtikidaddy-

First of all happy birthday dude. I'm going to be 39 on my next birthday later this year. I can definitely relate to alot of the things you mentioned, but I, against my better judgement, still crank music (but I always wear ear-plugs to live gigs).

Please don't feel that not relating to rap & hip-hop is a symptom of you hitting 40. Most of that stuff is garbage and doesn't need to be understood. For me the exceptions are the early rappers: RunDMC, Whodini, Beastie Boys and people of that ilk. Not these current dudes that go on and on about bling, women, and violence. That stuff sucks.

I always thought during the 80s that I missed out on stuff and that nothing was really happening around me. Now that I look back on it, we were probably the last generation to actually have a significant sub-culture of our own free from marketing and the merchants of cool. Kids today: forget it. They are nothing but shills for corporate culture. Completely bought and sold in the market place. I don't care how unique they think they are with bands like The Killers, The Bravery, & Jet. It's all derivitive crap. As Dee Dee Ramone once said 'rock 'n roll is not a civilised art form'. When the market is saturated with bands like Hot Hot Heat, I think it would be pretty hard to find one 'uncivilised' band out there these days.

Music, particularly rock music, was a way of life & a philosophy (as pretentious as that might sound) for our generation. Music for kids today is nothing but 'entertainment' and it seems that's the way they like it.

We knew better back in the 80s, that's why there was a great punk scene. Record labels like SST and Alternative Tenticles thrived on word of mouth WITHOUT any internet. Ther was still great rock music (even though it was slimming out by then) on the radio, and our parents didn't always understand what we were doing. Our rock music wasn't called 'Classic Rock'. By the time most of us were in the middle of high school Hendrix, Morrison, and Janis joplin had only been dead 10 years. Cobain has been gone that long already. Even though we didn't live through it, we were way closer to the foundations of cool and the culture reflected that. Imagine what 'Fast Times at Ridgemont High' would look like if it was made about the current generation of young people. BOR-ING!!

I am so glad that I got to grow up when I did. I would never want to trade places with the kids of today. I know it's all relative, but I don't think they're going to have much to look back on. Their memories will be a long crappy video, reality show, Paris/Britney/Gotti brothers hair-jelled nightmare!!!

[ Edited by: donhonyc on 2005-05-28 23:53 ]

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