WARNING: Guard your home tiki bar carefully! Home makeover show on the loose!

I was contacted today by a production company trying to find home tiki bars to be subjected to the What Not To Wear treatment. That is, they want people who find their friend or family member's decorating taste to be ghastly, so they can do a makeover on their over-the-top room.

They specifically asked me if I knew anyone with a home tiki bar in the Los Angeles area that wasn't decorated very well.

Frankly, I think this is awful.

Setting aside for a moment that these home makeover shows have a pretty terrible track record when it comes to doing any quality work (it only has to look good enough for the cameras, after all)...

Aside from that big, big issue... This is not a bad haircut, this is not a bad outfit, this is not something that could be holding someone back from a promotion or finding love because they're not putting their best foot forward (itself a pretty silly assumption, but that's again another issue for another day). This is someone's private space. Private, beloved space, that they've thrown their very personality into. Most likely their favorite bit of square footage on the entire planet. It doesn't have to please anyone but the person who lives in it. It's not supposed to.

I'm aghast at the idea that someone would have the gall to say "Hey, you know that room that you spent all that time and effort on, the one you're so proud of, the one you think really reflects who you are? It sucks! And these people who know have no idea who the hell you are are going to fix it up!"

Now, if the owner of the space is signing up to get some makeover help of their own volition, as appears to be the case with this other show, then that makes more sense. I still don't necessarily think it's a great idea, but at least they're opting in on their own.

But that's not the premise of the show that contacted me, the show that contacted me specifically said "don't tell the person, it has to be a secret!"

Ugh.

Now, yes, there are probably some people out there who have tiki rooms that aren't quite coming together the way they had hoped, and they could use some help, and this avenue sounds appealing. Here are my thoughts on that:

A) That kind of help can be had for free right here on Tiki Central.

B) Do you really think a TV show is going to choose the right decor? Tiki Bars, when done right, are anything but TV-friendly -- too dim.

C) This tv show that contacted me? They attached a flyer with examples of what they considered "bad" rooms. I won't post the picture here, because I don't know where the picture came from, I don't know if the person who owns the room has opted for public scrutiny of their cherished space. But I will tell you this:

The "bad" room was full of Witco furniture.

Caveat emptor. And if you live in the Los Angeles area, maybe now's the time to make clear to your friends & relatives how you feel on this subject.

cripes. I'm not an angry person, and yet, this get me boiling....

Humu, I think the "other" show is one and the same --after all it WAS supposed to be a SURPRISE make-over. :D

What a skewed idea, though. I could not imagine ANY Tiki home bar owner being happy about any TV show's art director's take on what "High end" Tiki looks like. It shows that these good folks firmly believe that THEY are in the possession of what good taste is and is not. -

Not realizing that one of the main qualities of Tiki is that it promotes freedom of all common notions of "good taste"! It is a class-less society in more than one way. Our class is no class...which makes it a class in itself! And Hooray for the fact that WITCO is still considered bad taste by the media! :) We are the bad taste underground!

I think they have no idea about what a tightly knit community they have tapped into: City-wide, state-wide, country-wide and world-wide. The folks here know and uphold only the most classic and elaborate private Tiki havens. These reality show makers need to find THEIR reality in the average Party City Tiki consumer that has no idea of O.A. and TC.

Oh, and don't come back at me wondering how I, Mr. "Preaching the true Tiki gospel", can rant on about a classless society: Classless meaning in relation to any generally known social and taste groups, but IN ITSELF it is of course a very intricate, multi-layered game whose rules baffle the novice and delight the veteran!

I get the feeling your Tiki Room will look like a Jimmy Buffett shrine when the production company gets done with it.

Boy, I hope they don't get in touch with my mother in law :D

To me, it's not even so much about whether the producers and other people involved with the show will have the same understanding of Polynesian Pop that the owner of the home tiki bar will have. (The show contacted me looking for home tiki bars, but the concept of the show was about over-the-top spaces of any flavor.) To me, the offense is that they don't seem to get that any over-the-top room is a beautiful form of outsider art. Anyone who chooses to decorate in an off-the-wall way in a part of their home is doing it for a reason -- it's pure expression and creativity, and it's to be encouraged.

Sending the message that there's reason to be ashamed of creating something wacky and weird, just because you don't have the skills of a professional designer... that's just rotten.

Now, creating something and then putting it up for appraisal, as when someone puts pictures of their home tiki bar on some website full of people who love to critique tiki stuff and then says "what do you think?" That's a little different. Those folks should be treated with a lot of respect for being willing to put themselves out there, but they've done just that: decided to put a piece of themselves out there and asked for feedback.

That's not what this show is. This show is looking for people who are doing their own wacky thing in their own wacky space. There should be more of that, not less.

Someone could milk it, though:
Set up a fake, crappy tiki bar.
You know, go spend $100 at Party City, then get free decorating to replace it.

Of course, it would have to be an outsider - one who has no tiki room previously.
Anybody got a brother or sister who needs a room done for free?
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I love that the "bad" Before room had Witco (shudder).
How TACKY!
You hit it on the head, Sven - thank goodness we're still under the radar!

I would love to get my mitts on a dumpster full of Witco pieces in the aftermath of one of these shows! (rubs hands together)

I can't remember what show it was but even Crazy Al couldn't save the Tiki makeover on one show I saw.

"I'm aghast at the idea that someone would have the gall to say "Hey, you know that room that you spent all that time and effort on, the one you're so proud of, the one you think really reflects who you are? It sucks! And these people who know have no idea who the hell you are are going to fix it up!"

well, in a way, welcome to our world.

On 2009-04-13 22:47, Mrs Bamboo wrote:
"I'm aghast at the idea that someone would have the gall to say "Hey, you know that room that you spent all that time and effort on, the one you're so proud of, the one you think really reflects who you are? It sucks! And these people who know have no idea who the hell you are are going to fix it up!"

---

well, in a way, welcome to our world.

Come on Mrs. Bamboo, they know at least one of you! You know, the silly guy with the eye patch.

DC

On 2009-04-13 22:32, SuperEight wrote:
I can't remember what show it was but even Crazy Al couldn't save the Tiki makeover on one show I saw.

I'm pretty sure you are thinking about the one HGTV's "Design Remix" did on Mel from Meshuggah Beach Party's office...

http://www.tikicentral.com/viewtopic.php?topic=27070&forum=1&vpost=356228&hilite=mel%20waldorf

...I'll let the photos and the YouTube vid speak for themselves. But yeah, this has the potential for being craptacular. I like the fake tiki room idea though...maybe i could hide all my real tiki stuff in the garage and maybe get a free paint job out of it!

On 2009-04-13 21:34, Formikahini wrote:
Someone could milk it, though:
Set up a fake, crappy tiki bar.
You know, go spend $100 at Party City, then get free decorating to replace it.

There is really no way of telling IF THEY might shop at party city to redecorate a room full of witco....lmao....They are NOT invited to my pad, fo-sh0!

I could easily see producers and "professional interior decorators" saying, "Look at this pop culture disaster!...Someone get the trashcan, and we'll start over here on this overcrowded shelf"....

I really think most of these types of shows are crap... Most of the time the before is much better than the after... especially after they fill them up with all the new junk furniture and such...
I do however like the extreme homemaker where they hook someone in need up with a new house..
Be cool to see one done up with lots of tiki involved...

whats television?

There won't be "a dumpster full of Witco pieces in the aftermath" as any actually cool Tiki stuff they dump will go home with various crew members and right into their Tiki bars.

A word of caution: Everyone posting here would never invite such a show to bring some "class" to their Tiki bar but what about your significant other and/or family? If you live in the greater LA area and you and the mister or missus have ever had issues about your collection...Well, it wasn't Aladdin who traded in his old lamp for a new one.

Wow, all of the sudden I feel dirty and ashamed.

I didn't know how embarrasing my choice of home decor really is.

Starting this afternoon, I will begin dismantling my collection and destroying the items of bad taste. After all, I can't let this crap potenially fall into the wrong hands. What a disservice to humanity that would be!

I think I'll switch over to that Shabby Chic white and weathered look that seems to be all of the rage.

Ah, to live and die in LA!

PTD

TV is the opiate of the masses. Handle with care.

Great topic on this . years ago I use too paint cars for the movies but after a while said im out of here kinda the same thing they wanted everything done as cheap & fast as possible & didnt know anything . they would drop off a car in the mid morning and be calling the next day . you couldnt do any kinda good job at all . just so it would look good for a glance of the cammera . I just wanted to post my thought on this cause it struck a nerve .

GROG going to send them to Bamboo Ben's house.

On 2009-04-13 23:55, beachbumz wrote:
I do however like the extreme homemaker where they hook someone in need up with a new house..
Be cool to see one done up with lots of tiki involved...

A couple seasons ago, they did one of those for a Samoan family and put in some really nice cultural touches. They definitely kept the family's heritage in mind when doing the decor. There was tapa, lauhala, and great island photography.

Humu, if you want to see them self-implode, send them to the Madonna Inn
in San Luis Obisbo.

I think Grog might have a room there too.

On 2009-04-14 07:29, Psycho Tiki D wrote:
Wow, all of the sudden I feel dirty and ashamed.

I didn't know how embarrasing my choice of home decor really is.

Starting this afternoon, I will begin dismantling my collection and destroying the items of bad taste. After all, I can't let this crap potenially fall into the wrong hands. What a disservice to humanity that would be!

I think I'll switch over to that Shabby Chic white and weathered look that seems to be all of the rage.

Ah, to live and die in LA!

PTD

Well, I know how embarrassing and distasteful MY decor choices are; I'm meticulous about each and every one of them, and I'm defending 'em to the last. If they show up here at the Cosmic Tiki Hut, they'll regret claiming to possess any sort of "good taste" -- 'cause I'll eat 'em. Fire-up the COALS...!

And to so many people, without even going into the decor, "old" equals bad taste and "new" equals good taste. I remember a few years ago when my wife were newly married, and found a really cool pogo light with orange fiberglass shades. When my mother-in-law visited, she told my wife "don't worry honey, one day you'll be able to afford nice new lamps."

This is the reason people have traded in their 1957 Chevy Belair for a nice new 1973 Chevy Malibu, sold their 1955 Fender tweed amp for a nice new 1969 silverface one, moved out of their Eichler house and into a plush new McMediterranean McVilla, etc.

On 2009-04-14 11:14, congawa wrote:
...moved out of their Eichler house and into a plush new McMediterranean McVilla, etc.

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

with a new McEscalade parked in front...

Hmmm... So this show could be sorta be a modern-day equivalent to the missionaries who told the Polynesians and Hawaiians etc of old, "Get rid of those tikis, we've got something new yer gonna love!".

This show doesn't actually throw out the 'old' decor, do they? Like in the trash? Couldn't they be sued afterwards? Finding my (IF I had them) Tiki Bob or Severed Head mug in shards at the bottom of a dumpster would make me have lawyers pouncing all over them...

The TV show people must be desperate for content if they have to re-do a tiki room, I mean did they run out of just plain lousy ugly normal rooms to work on? Also, if I came home and my house was redone by some TV show I would go berserk, they'd have to call the cops to hold me back.

Make mine a mai tai!

[ Edited by: TikiGoddess 2009-04-15 06:16 ]

This is scary and disturbing.
I'm glad I live on the other side of the world - then again I don't really have much tiki yet so I could probably do the fake room thing quite easily.

Humuhumu - what was your response to the production company?

Congawa - I've had something similar said to me. More along the lines of 'Why don't you just buy a new one?'
I've also read somewhere about how the car industry started changing the designs every year (or so) after the war so that people would keep buying. It became more obvious how old someone's car was.

Now if only Bamboo Ben was the lead decorator, I'd sign right up! :D

"Hey gang! BamBOOOO that hooouuse!"

Yes, sign me up for that show! I'll pretend I'm all shocked and stuff that Bamboo Ben has done a complete re-do on my house over the weekend (HA! - more like a month or 2, with all the cool details he puts in!).

"Oh, my GOODness! My house looks all Hawaiian! It looks 'tiki' - like a Trader Vic's restaurant! How clever!! Thank you, Design Team whom I've never met before, I promise!!"

Let's not forget about the fabulous work of Bosko!

Humu, can you get back in touch with those folks, and pitch 'em a new idea? Tell them they need to flip the premise.
Tell them there's crappy, tacky cheap-o "tiki", and then there's glorious, mystical, mysterious, richly atmospheric tiki. Ask them, how about taking someone's truly tacky, pathetic Party City "starter" tiki room, and converting it over to the "real deal" - to a room that they'll never want to leave? Tell them you know the premier artists and decorators in the field, and you can put them in touch.
Or, do you figure there's just no way they can drop their "superior", smug elitist attitude, and see the potential?

Bamboo Ben, Bosko, Crazy Al, and Danny G. show their work on the show, then the homeowner picks which one they want to design a proper Tiki Room. The non-winners have to help do the grunt work while wearing only grass skirts. Then Grog comes in to make a drawing about something funny that happened, in a kids show format, where he encourages the audience to join along and draw on the tv screen.

The host of the show goes around bugging all the workers while playing uke in their ear hole... this of coarse is King Kukulele. The beginning and end of the show start on stage like the Ed Sullivan show and there is a new musical guest who has to show off their stuff plus add funny musical sound effects when the workers are in precarious situations (horns probably).