Post #10983 by Kailuageoff on Mon, Oct 14, 2002 10:56 PM

Call me easily amused, or get strident and indignent and call me a tiki whore..., but I had a great time at Trader Vic's in Chicago tonight! Yes, I'm kinda of rum influenced right now -- but let me issue this warning -- Do not be put off by the the sour expericiences of others when searching out tiki temples. I was not expecting much at Chicago Vic's after Swen wrote about their denuding the place of vintage light fixtures, and JT wrote about the uptight crowd he encounterd there -- but everything about my visit tonight was primo braddah's and sista's. I got out of the cab and there to greet me on the sidewalk of the Palmer House Hilton was a five foot moai channeling all kinds of tiki aloha and mana into my already primed brain. I went downstairs and a perfectly delightful wahine greeted me with a warm smile and asked if I was there for drinks or dinner. Of course I said, "both and pictures" and she looked at me knowingly and ushered me to a booth by the bar. The Trader's hut was inhabited, but not crowded so I scaned the vintage menu, ordered a Somaon Fog Cutter and then started ambling around looking at the tikis, the prints of Captain Cook, the giant clam shells, the prints of Gaugain paintings, the Luau room, and the mugs and the incredible carving on the ceiling beams, the outriggers and the tikis and (did I mention the shelf full of the mugs), and the framed Trader Quotes and the trader advertising, and the stuff for sale like mugs, ash trays, shirts, caps and drink mixs. Oh yeah, and the Trader Vic's dishes that were set on all of the tables with Trader Vics coasters and napkins. (Geez, we got short-changed in Atlanta Guys -- where the hell was all this stuff Hukilau guys????)
Anyway, I consumed my very potent fog cutter and ordered a Menehuni Juice (Monday night special) and then devoured a Maui pork chop that was cooked in the Chinese ovens and was freakin, mouthwatering delicious -- and then called my lovely serving girl back for a flaming coffee grog -- which I blew out too soon and caused a 151 oil slick on, so that I defeated my caffine injection strategy and got really smashed. Meanwhile, the manager kept bringing stuff over to my table in brown paper sacks that I wanted -- drink mixs, an ash tray, a long-sleeved tee -- and I was throwing napkins and coasters in the sack -- geez, what was this going to cost anyway? Regardless, the price was worth every penny, except the fu$#in film, which was $9 in the hotel gift shop. But, who cares because I asked the sweet thing at the desk if I could possibly buy one of their delightful drink menus, and she said, "no, but I wiil give you one." And, when I tried to give her ten bucks for it anyway, she absolutely refused like she wanted me to take her home instead. So there! Chicago Vics can be nirvana if you have the right mana, bring a pleasant demeanor and exude charm that comes standard with a Visa gold card!
And, I haven't even hit the Hala Kahiki yet. Okay, It's time to pass out now. I have to work a gadam trade show in the morning. dam.

[ Edited by: kailuageoff on 2002-10-14 23:31 ]