Post #116034 by freddiefreelance on Wed, Sep 22, 2004 7:43 AM

We had some good ones back when I used to cater movies & videos.

On one shoot we were being ridden hard by the 2nd 2nd (that's the Second Second Assistant Director), he was ordering us around, having us tear down, move & reset-up and being a general pain. I asked who he thought he was to be ordering us around, he replied "I'm the 2nd 2nd!" And I came back with "So you're the Assistant to the Assistant to the Assistant?" He left us alone the rest of the day.

On another shoot one of my partners spotted one of the actors in the line & said "Hey, aren't you one of the talent?" The actor replied "I'm not 'talent,' I'm an Actor!" and my partner came back with "So, you're saying you have no talent?" That actor didn't speak up the rest of the shoot.

On one shoot we were having trouble with a particular grip, every meal we'd bring a gallon of milk for the crew, every meal he'd be first in line & grab the whole gallon for himself. He'd complain that we didn't give him enough meat (even though we served him more than anyone else, and seconds, too) and that we had too many salads & vegetables. One day he came up, looked at the two large steel bowls of salad we'd set up, said "this's Crap!" and knocked over one of the bowls, spilling the salad on the ground. This was too much for my partner, Scotty, who said "This's Crap, too!" and spilled the other bowl onto the ground, "All this is Crap!" and we spilled all the food onto the ground, danced over it singing "It's Crap! It's all Crap!" We packed up, handed them a bill for the day, & went home. That night we had a call from the production company and we told them what had happened. The next day we were back at work, the grip wasn't.