Post #134682 by Tiki_Bong on Sun, Jan 9, 2005 11:47 AM

By now I'm sure you've noticed that ALL the COOL people post in the 'Bilge' forum.

So what you may ask. So what you ask? Consider this: other 'Grand Memberships' cost $25 or more and offer you nothing but an exclusive forum to post in.

But now, for a limited time only, Tiki_Bong Reproductions is proud to offer you an exclusive 'Grand Membership' in the Bilge forum for the lowest price yet $24.99.

Listen to what you'll receive when your remittance is received at [email protected]:

• Personnalized derogatory messages aimed at increasing your self-esteem.
• Hydrogen atoms you can split at home for 'unlimited power'.
• Your name on the 'Bilge Wall of Honor' upon your death or dismemberment.
• 50% discount at participating Montgomery Ward stores.
• Quarterly Newsletter (if and when I get around to it).
• Bong's recipe for 'Texas Beef Skillet'.
• Bankruptcy advisory services.
• Free straw.
• Animal instinct.
• Sherpa guide service in the Hollywood Hills.
• Tire pressure consultation.
• Tips on avoiding personal responsibility.
• Jewelry-grade limestone.
• Additional memory space.
• Additional mammory space.
• List of Maslow's Hierarchy of Preferences.

Note - items depend on availability.

Just listen to these testimonials:

"yeah, it's great" Mr. Tiki Bong
"I'd order today" Mr. Tiki Bong
"This is the best Grand Membership" Mr Tiki Bong
"30 weight" Mr. Tiki Bong

(man, all this rain is making me extremely bored)