Welcome to the Tiki Central 2.0 Beta. Read the announcement
Tiki Central logo
Celebrating classic and modern Polynesian Pop

Beyond Tiki, Bilge, and Test / Bilge / So, I wrangled bees today

Post #320524 by Mr. NoNaMe on Sun, Jul 22, 2007 6:18 PM

You are viewing a single post. Click here to view the post in context.

Well, more like upset.
I am taking the pooches on their 1 o'clock walk and I spy out of the corner of my eye one of those cement lids for the water shut off at the curb, off. I peer inside and there are bees a buzzin and some honeycomb. I say to myself, "Self, you are gonna go back get some."

I go back around 4ish with a Punch Rothchild in the mouth and a spare in my pocket. I start blowin smoke, talkin smack to the bees.....well, not really. I want to keep it calm in case they are a bit edgy.
I do my figurin and math and what not on how fast I can get away. Thinkin about how I used to shuck and jive on the b-ball court.

There are only about 100ish? bees, no big deal. I'm a puffin away on the stogie, blowin the smoke in the hole. That is where it goes ya know. I reach in to test their attitude. No 'tude. Cool. I blow enough to where, maybe 30 split. "Hmm, I wonder if those are the soldiers!?" I am getting a bit hazy. Not knowing if I am drunk or hyper-ventilating.
I stick the almost gone cigar into the hole of the lid and shut it with lit end on the inside, still figurin my escape. I blow a little into the hole. Kinda like [i]they[i/] do when [i]they[i/] get of a plane during a storm, kissing the tarmac. Pop it open, grab the three layers of honeycomb, plop them into the bag, plop that into another bag and I am walking back to the house.

I stick the bags in a box and tape it shut with 30 or 50 pissed off bees still inside. I've already got the Que stoked and ready for my steaks, sos I bring the box to the patio and and smoke it up real good. Open the box, smoke a smokin, cut the bag open and the bees are dazed and confused flying away trying figure out what just happened. I brush the remainder off with a paint brush and I have three pieces of honeycomb. Neat.
I tossed some old lumber on the bbq after the steaks to keep the bees at bay for the evening.

Not a drop of honey.


Signature? I ain't signin nothin!

[ Edited by: Mr. NoNaMe 2007-07-22 19:11 ]