Post #379770 by tiki mick on Mon, May 12, 2008 1:08 PM

Here is a scary thought: You are walking down a dark alley at night, behind some old, wierd motel in Palm springs. Suddenly, the night grows even darker. Was that a shadow crossing the moon? No, it is Grog, Hinano Paul and soccer tiki, and all three of them want to do a tango on your face, beat you senseless and then leave you where they find you.

Good thing I can run fast!

So I run. And bump into a strange man with punk-blonde hair holding a gay palm springs directory. I think I am safe, when out comes the knife. (It's a custom Ruzik knife)it slashes across, down and then across again. I am disembowled. Just like in the movie "Caligula", the mai-tai and scorpion cocktails come gushing out, and I crumple half-dead in the parking lot. There is a pool of drying blood, the knife is still there, but all the other guests have long since gone. Only the swimming pool remains, with 2-or 3 forlorn and sad pool toys floating around, waiting for next year's Tiki Caliente 2!!!!

Amen!