Post #576983 by bigbrotiki on Sun, Feb 20, 2011 2:25 PM

Ha! Thanks, I almost forgot about this, it was a good one. I have the original filed away somewhere.

Here's my text from page 1 of this thread that goes with these images. The above images go where the blue boxes are, I kept the boxes in the text for clarity so folks can see where these images went:

On 2006-01-08 16:03, bigbrotiki wrote:
Since the BOOK OF TIKI was published in September 2000, images from its pages have been copied for CD covers, web sites, paintings, shirts, boxer shorts, erasers, and other products, and I have enjoyed them as proof of its influence on contemporary pop culture.

But never would I have believed to come upon such flagrantly unauthorized, absurd and hilarious abuse such as this, being entirely composed from art and images from my book. In essence this is a classic junk mail scam, asking little old ladies to mail in money for miraculous results.

I feel very conflicted, since this is the funniest thing I have ever come across, right up my alley, along the lines of the Church of Subgenius and other cult parodies. As a matter of fact, it is like taking the mock scientific style of my book to its logical conclusion, pronouncing it to be a REAL cult! Yet I fear that there is a remote possibility that someone will actually buy into this stuff, even though the text and concept are so far out there, it all seems like a joke. Let's hope no one does.

And now, without further ado, behold in disbelief the miracle of the LAST GREAT TIKI OF UNLIMITED ABUNDANCE mail scam (These and more letter pages were passed onto me by Tiki Tony, who got them from a neighbor):

The photo of the author, "Great Maori Magus HAAPAPE TUARII", (also see below) actually depicts a Mai Kai waiter pouring a flaming drink (from page 160 of the BOT, the mugs are from p. 177).

Mr. Tuari wants you to transfer 50.- bucks to his SWISS BANK ACCOUNT (!) (see green box w. "Important Note" under his photo) in return for receiving the BIG LOTTO JACKPOT MAGIC of the TIKI OF UNLIMITED ABUNDANCE.

I scanned the pages large in the hopes the text can be read on TC, it's just too much to copy down here. This guy's stupefying, never-ending flow of text proves to me that he: a .) must be an American in full command of the language; and b.) has done this type of scam before, with other concepts.

It's all very easy: Cut image of Tiki along dotted line, place between palms of both hands for one minute, and it will be charged with your PERSONAL KARMIC IMPRINT! Remit with your 50,- bucks, and all sorts of luck will befall you. (This by the way is the only truly ancient Tiki that I used in the BOT, on page 21... maybe he knew!??)

Just in case there was any doubt that the Book of Tiki was his exclusive source, this extensive layout has an abundance of photos and graphics all from its pages. The photo of the Shelter Isle Apartments in Arcadia is retitled here as "the magic place where Haapape Tuarii practices the great ritual ceremonies of the solstice" and the TIKI DRIVE street sign supposedly now stands in Papeete, Tahiti, not Orange County.

Needles to comment on this image, but the scan nicely shows the cheap quality of the paper used for the letter pages. And in case you haven't been hypnotized by the Magus' endless drivel yet, take this:

And what's a good scam with out "Authentic witness statements", of which this is just one of many pages (as exception to the rule, both photos are NOT from the BOT):

Unbelievable...but real. Not a parody. I thought about sending in 50.- and finding out more...

[ Edited by: bigbrotiki 2011-02-20 15:06 ]