Post #633180 by Banana Bill on Sat, Apr 21, 2012 11:48 PM

Thanks again, TropicDrinkBoy! Wish I'd happened to check in and read your detailed review before I left San Fran. I'm glad to see that what I chose to do was fairly in line with your advice.

My SF adventure was great, though it didn't start out that way. I grabbed a couple of coworkers who were willing to help me get the tiki out of my system as soon as we could escape on Saturday, the 14th. Our plan was to dine at the Tonga room and then hit Smuggler's Cove. Complete FAIL. We couldn't get a reservation at the Tonga, so we went over just to wait in line for the bar. The line stretched down the hall. I think there was a private party as well as a wedding reception afterparty going on, and the place was packed. With all the young, beautiful, stylish people going in, coming out and waiting in line, you'd never know the Tonga was under threat of extinction. It seemed like the hottest new club in town. I barely got to peek through the door and only heard, but didn't witness, the famous rainstorm. Alas, my hungry, thirsty, non-tikiphile colleagues were not up for waiting in line for very long ... so, heartbroken, I turned away and dragged them to Smuggler's. Which, by the way, also had a long line of young, beautiful, stylish people. Being none of those things, we were not up to waiting long in that line, either. Thus ended a tikiless night of despair. Lesson learned: don't even try on Saturday night!

My work friends felt bad for me, so they let their arms be twisted into dining at Trader Vic's a day or two later. I enjoyed the Cheese Bings and had the hugest pork chop I've ever seen, beautifully cooked in the Chinese oven. Even my non-tiki coworkers were blown away by their entrees. As for drinks, the 1944 Mai Tai was very good, as it should be. I also sampled the Navy Grog and a flaming coffee drink for dessert - don't recall the name. Don't suppose I was recalling much at all at that point. I should also mention that we had the sweetest server ever, and when I identified myself as a tiki freak and began asking questions about the place, she rewarded my interest by bringing us a free (and dee-lish) coconut ice cream dessert. As for decor, I was enchanted by the collection of huge tikis arranged like organ pipes in the room we occupied ... the detailed paintwork on the rafters ... and the backlit collection of masks they had covering one full wall. Just wish I'd known to look for those Hinky Dinks lamps in the bar! I'll need another visit and a lot more time to fully appreciate the place.

After taking one night off from tiki, somehow I managed to drag my coworkers back out for a visit to Smuggler's Cove ... at around 6 pm on Tuesday -- a much quieter night! We walked right in. The main floor and second-level tiki hut were already jam-packed, though, so we went downstairs and snagged the last remaining table by the "lagoon." While I think the drinks were generally too sweet for my bourbon- and vodka-loving compadres, I went full-tilt tiki and loved it. I sampled the Puka Punch, Captain's Grog and whatever it is they serve in the barrel you can keep, which a coworker chose for me during his round to buy. I especially loved the Captain's Grog and have since discovered that the recipe in Beachbum Berry Remixed is close, if not the very recipe they're using. There were so many more things on their massive drink menu I wanted to try and didn't get to -- a volcano bowl, a rum flight, their take on the Mai Tai -- ugh! Can't wait to go back.

And that about sums it up ... so thanks for reading ... and I hope some of this will be helpful to other newbies on the SF tiki scene.