Post #644440 by woofmutt on Tue, Jul 17, 2012 8:53 PM

(This idea was inspired by a hilarious joke about comedians at a retirement home.)

We should number all the old arguments, statements, and More Tiki Than Thou! proclamations that get made over and over and over again.

If all the things you were forced to constantly repost had numbers you could save valuable minutes of your life, minutes that could be better spent organizing your collection of vintage hotel dry cleaning bags.

Here's how this awesome idea would work...

Let's say new member Tiki_Robin_Egg_Blue_Hawaiian starts a thread titled Elvis- king of tiki??? and then goes on to explain why Elvis is not only the King of rock-n-roll, he's the King of Tiki as well.

But you know better! Because back in 1974 while in Spokane for the World's Fair you happened to share a cab with Elvis and the two of you got talking about tropical drinks and the King said he liked Mai Tais but he hated rum so he always got them with vodka.

This story proves that Elvis isn't Tiki and it's such a great story you've managed to already post it on 27 times Tiki Central.

Aren't your fingers tired from constantly reposting the same thing over and over again?

Of course they are!

If your fantastic story had a number all you'd have to do when once again correcting someones monumentally stupid opinion about Elvis would be to post that number!

Then you could log off and sleep the righteous sleep of one who has yet again made the world of Tiki safe from idiots.

So, probably the first 20 or 30 numbers should be things we all use a lot....

001 That's not Tiki!
002 It's Tiki, but it's crappy.
003 We've already discussed this.
004 There is already a thread covering this subject.
005 If you do a search you'll find there are numerous threads on that topic
006 No, seriously, just do a friggin search already!!!
007 Yes, it's Witco.
008 Yes, it's Witco, but it's not Witco Tiki.
009 No, it's not Witco.
010 Not every piece of burned wood is Witco.
011 It's worth $____.
012 Just because it's Hawaiian doesn't mean it's Tiki.
013 Just because it says it's Tiki doesn't mean it's Tiki.
014 It's from Party City and it's ugly as hell.
015 Wow! Cool!
016 Nice! Keep up the good work!
017 I hate Facebook!
018 Did you notice I'm not on Facebook?
019 I wish I was going to (name of Tiki event)!!! :(
020 Jimmy Buffett isn't Tiki.
021 Reggae isn't Tiki.
022 Calypso isn't Tiki.
023 Salsa no es Tiki.
024 Flamingos aren't Tiki.
025 Monkeys aren't Tiki.
030 Margaritas aren't Tiki.

And so on!