Post #736498 by Jungle John on Mon, Feb 2, 2015 11:27 AM

The question has been asked, "Hey Jungle John, you handsome devil, why the sudden gusto in transforming your bland suburban backyard into a tiki strewn Polynesian fantasy paradise? Huh, what's up with that, you rakishly suave operator? Don't you recall the fiasco of toying with the backyard back in 2003? Your tiki hut rotted in the Florida sun, your hollow fiberglassed paper-mache tikis, all three of them, became hosts to angry bees, and you had to pay a bee keeper to come out and haul them unceremoniously away. The waterfall and pond was a disaster when wild raccoons came over the fence and fished out every single fat goldfish (your beloved koi), and left them there on the obsidian stained patio. And what about the constantly rainy weather every time you wanted to have a luau? And lest you forget, there wasn't enough citronella in all the tiki torches in the world to hold back the hungry hordes of a million murmuring mosquitoes in a hot and humid South Florida summer evening. There were a few remnants of those days, a battered tiki peeking through the foliage, a shard of a broken coconut cup, a splint of bamboo, old artifacts of those days; Is that what made you go full tilt Polynesian culture vulture and start dressing up the backyard? Well, is it, you globetrotting-off-to-exotic-locales Lothario?"

Well observant inquisitor, I can just say, I don't know. Perhaps it is the stress of getting older and realizing I'm never really going to visit any real south sea paradise. Or probably because I just want to have some creative fun and do little projects to keep the brain juices flowing. I love the kitschy vibe of the whole mid 20th century tiki movement. Since I was a kid and I saw the Enchanted Tiki Room, and my family actually stayed at the Polynesian Disney Resort one time in the 1970s I loved it. Give me a slide down into a volcano pool and booyah, I am forever a tiki aficionado. It really seems to have been a south California thing that spread to hinterland places, and yeah South Florida has its own cool Key Westy, Jimmy Buffetish, Caribbean thing happening, but nothing matches that seductive ambiance of the south seas and those oh-so-friendly natives. What's that? Can't you hear the strains of Bali Hai wafting in the breeze right now?

I haven't learned from my mistakes. Well, maybe a little. That's why this time I'm planning for things to last a little longer. I learned that anything organic in south Florida with rot outside. Thatching, reeds, bamboo, expensive carved totems all disintegrate in the elements or from the ravages of pests. Shellac and protect all you want, but even a fake foam-around-pvc-pipe tiki from 2003 fell apart after a dozen years! (Also it was really close to the fire pit, so that may have been a contributing factor in its falling apart) (see picture). The new tiki hut is electrical conduit, covered in long lasting sun screen material. It really will serve as a fancy trellis for the jungle like vines that grow here. I want alamanda-monstera or mandeville for their flowers, but will probably have a mix of wild Virginia creeper and Hawaiian baby wood rose. The wood rose is okay in the summer, but looks bad in the winter after seeding. (Here's a fun fact, the Hawaiians, well the dumb ones, would eat the seeds of the wood rose to get a high and commune with their tiki gods, but the seeds have ergine in addition to the lysergic acid LSA, and that causes a host of problems like cardiovascular constriction and liver damage). Aloha.

I appreciate the tiki "purists." I really do. A finely carved statue or woodwork is beautiful. Finely wrought drinks in a slip-cast tiki shaped mug are exquisite. The anthropological approach to appreciating other cultures is admirable. But the warped fantasy that is mid century tiki should easily accept new interpretations. Space age materials to make tikis should be embraced and not dismissed by the purist "snobs" as being too artificial for something that is artificial to begin with. Love and warm regards from my island fantasy,
Jungle John (with a wahini wave from South Sea Sally)

[ Edited by: Jungle John 2015-02-02 18:55 ]

[ Edited by: Jungle John 2015-02-02 19:02 ]