Post #795216 by Prikli Pear on Fri, May 17, 2019 8:48 AM

Austin has been without a true tiki experience since Steak Island on Town Lake was converted into the Magic Time Machine back in the 1970s. After visiting Lost Lei during their grand opening party, it's clear Austin's going to have to wait a while longer to get its tiki fix. To say their website descriptions are an exaggeration is an understatement.

It's located in the basement beneath Capital Grille. It's dark, which any good tiki bar should be. It's also noisy. Incredibly noisy. The floor was stained concrete, the walls covered with faux stone and the high ceilings are industrial and bare. It's the Spartan aesthetic that ensures every noise will echo and amplify, with absolutely nothing to break it up. I hate restaurants with this type of design, but for a tiki bar, which is all about escapism, it was particularly egregious. The music playing, when it could be heard, is Top 40 pop. Backstreet Boys. Justin Bieber. There is multicolored lighting throughout. The bar had thatch above it, which is pretty much standard for even faux tiki bars. The most striking element in the place are skull columns. The two structural support columns in the middle of the floor space have barrels (rum barrels?) at the base, with the upper portion wrapped in resin skulls. That's it for the decor. There are colored ball lights hanging from the ceiling, but there's no netting, so they're not even pretending to be float lamps. I am not exaggerating when I say I could strip all "exotic" decor from the place in under an hour to convert it to a generic Austin bar. Let me make it clear: There was not a single tiki in the entire "tiki bar."

The cocktails were not terrible, but nothing special. The Mai Tai had the proper flavor profile, (ie not rum and pineapple juice) but the flavors were feeble. The Caribbean 75, a rum-based riff on the French 75, was decent, and a dry change of pace from all the sweet drinks on their menu. Washed Ashore tasted like a generic tiki cocktail and the Beach Bum tasted pretty much like a Port Light, despite having bourbon as the only shared ingredient. I would not consider it a craft cocktail bar, as I saw them using Finest Call syrups. One bartender was free pouring as often as he used jiggers.

The kicker, though, are their "custom" tiki mugs. Look closely. Seem familiar? They are all uglier, cheaper knock-offs of the distinctive mugs produced by 3 Dots and a Dash. There's no branding on the bottoms, so Tiki Farm, Munktiki and Eekum Bookum aren't involved, fortunately. Cheap Chinese knockoffs. The have original swizzle designs, surprisingly enough. I've since heard they tried to copy 3 Dots' swizzles as well, but Royer put a stop to that. Even the name, Lost Lei, sounds suspiciously like Lost Lake. What is it with their obsession with Chicago tiki bars?

Lest I sound entirely negative, our bartender was friendly and attentive for the hour we spent there, and all cocktails were $5 for the opening night party, which seemed fair.