Post #81932 by kctiki on Sat, Mar 20, 2004 6:36 PM

I’m feeling a little weird now. Maybe sitting down and telling this will help settle my nerves. My boss had me running errands all over town today so I thought I’d combine it with a thrift store marathon east to west across the greater metro area.

The thing with the owls was mentioned recently so I knew I’d notice more owls than usual today. That’s to be expected, just the way the subconscious mind works. It started off normal enough. Macramé owls, ceramic, wood, & marble owls. Owls woven into baskets, owl thermometers, and pastel plastic owl patio lights. As any veteran thrift shopper knows, that’s just the tip of the iceberg when it come to owls.

But the odd thing was, the longer I shopped, the higher the owl to non-owl ratio climbed. But the mind will play tricks on a weary shopper so I stopped to fortify myself with some Fritos and a chocolate long john.

At the next place I made the standard methodical & meticulous search of the ceramic bric-a-brac section. I made a second sweep just in case I missed anything good. And the second time there were MORE owls than had been there before! And some of the owls that WERE there before, with both eyes wide open, were now winking one of their eyes!

I drove away reassuring myself that I was simply losing track because so many owls come in pairs, and not just the salt & pepper shakers. But decorative owls are inanimate objects and cannot procreate. I simply have an overactive imagination and was possibly influenced by a story my brother tells of being attacked by a giant albino owl while walking thru the woods at night. He tried to run away but his backpack kept snagging on branches. He tried to shrug off the backpack but his arms became entangled like a straight jacket. He was helpless and the owl could have easily pecked his eyes out, but at that point it just flew away.

Last stop, Antique City & Craft Market on Merriam Lane in KCK. A flea market, not a thrift store, shouldn’t be so dense with owls. But it was. I told myself to just give up and go home but was strangely compelled to go on as if I were being drawn into some kind of fifth dimensional owl grand finale.

I spotted the owl in booth 022 from the next aisle over. He almost defies description. Perched on a sword with wings spread wide across an orange and yellow sunburst. Closer examination showed that some rather bizarre artiste went to quite a bit of trouble with this owl. He seems to be made of feathers and cement and plastered over with some kind of gunk. The sunburst around him is encrusted with what appear to be plastic grapes coated with gold glitter. His sword perch is adorned with a chain and an extension cord. I don’t know what these embellishments symbolize and I’m frightened to guess.

The insidious personality of whoever created this owl seemed to be oozing forth. I could see him laboring madly in some hidden holler, a big grizzly man with missing teeth and a bushy, crab infested beard. I took a cautious step back & peered around the rest of the booth. Ah, an owl painted on a saw, not so scary. That’s when I noticed the beavers, and the skulls. Made of cement and other items and coated with the same mysterious gunk as the owl. The beavers striving to appear normal but the madness peaking thru. I suddenly had the distinct impression that I was gazing upon the work of two lunatics, not one.

It was 5:00, I was the last customer remaining in the store. I left in a daze, completely forgetting to go back to booth 039 for the monkey pod fish. As I scanned the lot for my car I noticed an incredibly rusty vehicle. Not just rust spots but every square inch of the metal given over to corrosion.

There was someone in the car. Two someones. They had big bushy beards. As I crossed the lot their heads turned in unison to follow my path. Their shoulders didn’t turn, just their heads. I glanced up once again as I slammed my car door shut. One of them winked.