What Is Your Personal Curse?

Taking a page from Gigantalope's "Let's Discuss" topics.

What corny, inane, trivial (or maybe not), Curse do you have to endure in life.

Here is mine: Everytime I try to use a person's driveway to turn my car around, THAT person arrives home at that moment.

This happens far too often to be coincidence. Doctor Z has seen it occur several times. It is an innocuous curse, yet one I must deal with the rest of my life. Don't know what band of nit-picking gypsies, running low on ideas, cursed me with this one, but evidently they did. I almost take pride in it now.

Another common curse I've heard of is were streetlights burn out as you pass under them. Doctor Z claims he has this curse. I have seen it happen to him several times.

What other strange curses exist among TC members. I can think of Polynesian Pop's unique curse right off the bat...

I have the street light curse, too. One time I was traveling with 2 friends that suffer from it as well & we burned out six street lights, in one streach of road burning out three in a row. Also, if I park under a street light on the street or in a parking lot more than once or twice that light'll burn out.

I also have the curse of being the person in a line that people ask questions. While waiting in line for the Tiki Room anniversary mug I had people stop & ask me "Why are you waiting in line" every 10 minutes or so. I quickly tired of people looking at me funny for waiting in line for a Tiki Room Mug & began giving other answers: "We're in line for the Matterhorn," "We're in line for Space Mountain (already closed for repairs)," "We're waiting to meet Roy Disney (still in charge at that point)," "We're waiting in line for Marie Osmond's autograph on her christmas ornaments (that got less strange looks than the Tiki mug)," "We're waiting to meet the Oak Ridge Boys (and various other country & pop acts," "We're waiting for the parade to start, & all of the best characters are on this side of the street."

Rev. Dr. Frederick J. Freelance, Ph.D., D.F.S

[ Edited by: freddiefreelance on 2004-10-03 20:04 ]

Perhaps not as exciting but still a curse. I have found that every time I have said " I will never..." results in a guarantee that the very thing or event to be avoided WILL happen. Pick a subject. Sometime minor, sometimes major. A couple of times I have put the "never curse" in motion just to get what I really want.

That and the uncanny ability to stand in someone's way while trying to get out of their way.

[ Edited by: I dream of tiki on 2004-10-04 11:18 ]

No matter what type of garb I may be wearing that day, when in retail stores I get mistaken for an employee. The worst was one day I was checking out the closeout action figures in Kaybee, and this woman with small child in tow asks me where the new Barbies were. After telling her I didnt work there, she started swearing profusely at me, demanding to speak with my manager because she was going to make sure I was fired on the spot for insulting her. Now when asked where things are, I just tell them "Aisle 5, bottom shelf", and walk away.
Living in a small town, it seems like everybody knows me, and I always get asked if I still work at [fill in the blank], even if I haven't worked there in 10 years.
I can be 2 states away, and still run into someone I only know briefly, and they snag me and start yacking, like I remember a certain item I sold them years ago.

Coconut Boy, what a flattering tribute, and a toothsome topic.

I would say my curse must be insects. I have 2 pet birds who I spoil, and from thier seed my house has tiny moths...the size of a grain of rice...kilt eating bastards they are!

I buy a nice fuente, and it has pinholes from tobacco beetles. I plant a garden, and it's cucumber beetles. I get in a sleeping bag, and there's a scorpion..There is a black widow in almost every machine I own.

Once in Ecuador I was in hotel during a thunderstorm and tarantulas were falling on me as I tried to fall asleep. (which might be another topic about nasty things in tropical paradise)

When I or my dogs get a tick (which I especially loathe) I save them in a jar to feed to my Ciclid who I keep for such occasions.

I'm not squeemish about them...but they have ruined more than a few occasions for me.

[ Edited by: Gigantalope on 2004-10-04 00:32 ]

Crazy people love to strike up conversations with me on the street. Which is sometimes OK, but other times, when you're not in the mood, it's frustrating. On Saturday I wasn't really in the mood, and lo and behold, some crazy guy sees me waiting at the streetcar stop, comes OUT of the McDonalds, and starts telling me random things about the weather, how he is always hungover, how Europe is a good place to party, how he misses his parents, etc. I assume he is waiting for the streetcar too, but when the streetcar comes, he says 'OK, bye, I go back to eat now' and goes back into the McDonalds... yes, crazy people love me!

I have also noticed that any time there is a long lineup I am standing it (say, at the train station) and someone needs to cut across the line, I am always the place in the line they must break through. I have determined I must leave a little more space between me and the next person than others do, hence looking like the pefect place for someone to break through the line with all their bags and luggage... scuse me... scuse me...

Changing toilet paper rolls wherever I am,be it work (constantly!),home,the dentist's office,restaurants,etc.Apparently,I'm one of the few people on the planet that can tackle this difficult and time consuming manuever.

Docwoods - I think that must be a true curse. Evidence? - I haven't found an empty toilet paper roll at work or in public restrooms for years. You must be replacing them all just before I get there. I just wanted to take the time to thank you for your personal curse and let you know that your ARE appreciated.

Sabu

Small children have always been attracted to me, and I have no idea why.

Thanks,Sabu,my mission is a noble one!

I wonder about the street light thing; they often go out as I pass under them. Once, while driving my girlfriend home after a horror movie, I was talking to her in a low spooky voice and a whole string of them went out. She was not amused. Personally, I think the street lights must have a light sensor that is set off by my headlights. I dunno, but I kinda like it.

On 2004-10-04 12:34, cynfulcynner wrote:

Small children have always been attracted to me, and I have no idea why.

small children tend to fall and start crying when they get within a 5 foot radius of my personal space, and I don't know why. sometimes, this applies to waiters as well.

also, Murphy's Law is prevalent in my life. whatever I'm prepare for, doesn't happen. what happens is things I'm not prepared for. Thus, I make it work in my favor by preparing for bad things (survival kits in my house and car, galore) and not preparing for good things (e.g., when I was unemployed, I kept taking out more loans with the expectation that I would not be hired for a while; and then I was obviously hired and went to Vegas with the loan $$). that way, when a good thing happens, I'm not ready for it but I am pleasantly surprised.

I too have experienced the mystery of the street lights.

Perhaps I am a SLIder? http://paranormal.about.com/library/weekly/aa012400a.htm

Then again perhaps not. Go here and read the posts from sbd43

This has happened to me several times: The batteries in every electronic device I have on me goes dead at the same time. Once my car battery even died. Could not use my cell to call for help. Had to walk a few miles to find a phone.

Hakalugi helpfully informed:
http://paranormal.about.com/library/weekly/aa012400a.htm

Oh great; I may actually have a super-power and its a dorky one. "Stand back, criminals, lest thy watches be slow thine credit cards malfunction!"

This is about as useful as bending spoons.

Not if you're Uri Geller.

Whenever I'm getting ready to close my store, even if not one person has entered the door in 2 hours, they will all come in 2 minutes before closing and set up camp. Usually they "just want to look" and end up reading all the books and mags. (Damn you Barnes & Noble!) I usually kick them out after 5 minutes or so. They other thing is whenever I get a chance to sneak into the bathroom, people will enter the store and immediately yell, "HELLO?" as if they have to be acknowledged that second or they'll freak out, or the phone will ring. Gaaagggggghhhhhh!

[ Edited by: stuff-o-rama on 2004-10-04 19:40 ]

When I try to hold a tiki event in Florida in September, a hurricane veers towards us and ruins my plans. Happens every time!

I always seem to choose the supermarket line in which I'm directly behind a person that has an overwhelmingly complicated transaction, often taking more than one staff employee to resolve and even in the Express lane.

I also have the Driveway Turnaround Curse, slightly different: no matter how desolate the house, if I choose their driveway, the family emerges expectantly, either all dressed up as if they were expecting a favorite guest, or they all run out as if they were hoping for an ambulance, and it's always ridiculously large families!

The bird curse: all talking parrots sound like solicitous hookers to me, when they say, "Hi", with their little high-pitched voices. Birds who have taken a vow of silence will say this to me, and their owners are shocked, and then tell me the bird hasn't said one word for years. I show up, and the parrot instantly turns into the greeting floozy, which makes me laugh, and then we keep setting each other off.

The Curse of Good Taste: show me an assortment of anything, the less I know about it the better, and if I "had" to pick one, it's always the best and/or most expensive item in the group. All I need now is the curse of too much money!

[ Edited by: ZebraTiki on 2004-10-04 22:06 ]

I am a weirdo magnet also. The nutters always want to be my friend. I can have long hair or short hair, wearing nice clothes or thrashers, it don't matter. They always want to talk to me. And they all seem to think I know what their ibbity-bibbity word salad is all about.
My other curse is that people think I am Johnny Weedseed. I am always aproached by strangers and asked if I know where to score them grass.

Chongolio

-- I believe that our Heavenly Father invented the monkey because he was disappointed in man."
... Mark Twain

Come explore http://www.lost-isle.com

[ Edited by: Chongolio on 2004-10-05 00:24 ]

Childern...Nuts...Blinky lights? Those are blessings.

I once got stung by a carpenter bee on a island in the galapagos with not a blade of grass on it...how..why...wha the?

A tequnique I use on nuts who come up is to ask them for money...a little change to help me out...(usually tat sends them on thier way)

Some give money...but some get nasty...if that's the case then I'll roll a quarter into traffic, and laugh.

but insects...grrr

I wonder if Benzart has any issues with Walkingsticks?

[ Edited by: Gigantalope on 2004-10-05 19:07 ]

I would have to say ex-girlfriends. Their memory taunts me in the night and etchs my soul with torment and pain, music is my salvation...sad music.

Mimes...there's a curse.
Worse then even insects...thank god I don't live near a large french park..

shutup and talk!

mimes

how loathsome.

Chongo - got any smoke?

I am known as "De-Mech" - with the power to stop any normally working mechanical device simply by touching it.

It's not a joke to the dozens whose stuff I have handled and destroyed with my might.

Hand it to someone else or put someone else behind the wheel or give it to someone else and voila - it works - every time.

BTW, Street people talk to me ALL the time, too, but that's a blessing... keeps the perspective from getting skewed by normalcy.

So Chongo - hook a braddah up?

My curse has to be procrastination. I had to learn how to spell that right because I can't be cured. It's a bit more complicated though. I'll tell you about it later.........

Being a guy this one is extra tough to live with. I have absolutely no sense of direction, yet I always insist to the wife that I know where i'm going. I could be driving straight into the sun setting in the Pacific ocean and say "I'm heading due East, so put that map away!"

On 2004-10-06 09:50, pablus wrote:
I am known as "De-Mech" - with the power to stop any normally working mechanical device simply by touching it.
It's not a joke to the dozens whose stuff I have handled and destroyed with my might.

Hey Pablus!
Is the "tiki" still in check?

On 2004-10-07 08:52, tiki-riviera wrote:
I have absolutely no sense of direction, yet I always insist to the wife that I know where i'm going.

Your next car needs to be one with GPS navigation! 8)

i have the curse of 1) bonking into anything around me since i'm a tall/wide klutz and 2) if there is any appurtenence within two feet of me, i will catch an article of clothing on it. oh yeah, an open container of liquid near me has a half-life of when it will spill, not if :) that is why i drink fast :)

Whenever I open a bottle of rum, the contents evaporate within 24 hours.

does the same thing happen with tylenol like...a day later?

That is wierd!

I always step in gum. If there is gum in a parking lot and I'm about to get in my car, gum. And talk about karma, as I got out of my car, I spat out my gum and told Lady Velour, as a joke, I'll step in it when we come back. Sure enough I did.

Every time I go to post, nothing shows up.

... damn.

My curse is when I drive to work, there is never a good song on the radio. I press the scan button again and again... nothing but commercials and a sore finger.

That is, until I pull into the driveway. Then a good song comes on.

[ Edited by: Beatnikine on 2004-10-08 10:12 ]

Same as Vintage Girl, only my powers are greatest in airports.

I give off a form of energy that causes the person in front of me in the ticket line to decide to attempt a last second ticket/flight/destination change that is incompatible with their original itinerary or fair. My power is so substantial that the person becomes incapable of understanding any language the ticket people speak and instantly locks all the credit cards that person may try to use until such a time that I am late for my own flight.

Their is a minor gravitaional effect associated with my curse, as well. It renders all baggage belonging to the person in front of me 8 pounds over the weight limit and requires the owner to sort, prioritize, and loudly narrate each discovery and the subsequent deliberation required to determine whether said item should be jettisoned or retained.

Once at the boarding gate, my powers morph into an uncontrolled force that enlarges the person in front of me's bag to beyond carry-on size. At the same instant, the bag owner becomes incapable of parting with the bag for even the shortest flight time.

Once on the plane, the most tragic part of the curse takes effect - it attracts any collicky babies within a 40 row radius and renders the child's parent deaf to the catterwauling of their spawn.

Also, all the shoes I buy act as puke attractants in bars.

Either that, or people's shoe fashion sensibilities are far more delicate than previously believed.

My personal curse is:

"F&ck you up the a$$hle, stinky donkey a$$hle, My Friend!"

Charles maybe a little Tourette's syndrome.

That's one hell of a curse Charles....

Guess I'll stop complaining about finding songs on the radio.

-Linda