Public warning to Tiki Bong; everyone please read

I really hate resorting to this, but this has been a long time coming.

This is a public warning to Tiki Bong, and a notification to all Tiki Central members.

Starting today, Tiki Bong will be permanently banned from Tiki Central if any of the following occurs in the forums or in Shout:

• Tiki Bong posts any joke aimed at a new user (insulting or not).
• If someone (new member/old member) Tiki Bong has directly targeted in a joke (insulting or otherwise) protests to me about it.
• If someone (new member/old member) protests about Tiki Bong rekindling any of the actions or language pertaining to old, existing complaints between him and the member.

There’s nothing wrong with joking with a new user per se, but because Bong has no concept for “acceptable humor” vs. “unacceptable humor”, I’m simply saying ALL jokes to new users. The same goes for member protests. Bong apparently has no concept of acceptable vs. unacceptable, so if someone complains, he’s banned. It would be best of him to steer clear of jokes targeted at anyone, and not post anything about new users at all.

Now before you say “Wow Hanford, that’s harsh” remember that these rules should be the easiest rules in the world to follow. There’s nothing difficult about it. In fact, virtually every Tiki Central member follows these rules every day without a warning.

And before you say “But I like Bong, I think he’s funny” I have to say that it’s not about that. I like Bong too. I think he’s funny. When he’s crossed the line, I’ve cut him slack again and again. I’ve at times given him the benefit of the doubt. I’ve also temporarily banned him for days and weeks at a time. We’ve had countless serious discussions about how he has to stop. However, he always says the same thing: that he won’t do it again.

But the bottom line is he has repeatedly broken his word to me, and simply doesn’t follow the rules. I refuse to believe he’s incapable of following them, so clearly he is either playing me, or not taking me seriously. Neither are acceptable. This is not about whether or not he’s funny, or a good guy, this is about following the rules.

It is 100% within Bong’s own power to stay on Tiki Central and not get banned. It’s all in his hands. These rules are easy to follow. I really hope that he won’t do anything to get banned because I want him to stick around. But the days of me cutting him slack are over. It has gone on too long.

Feel free to PM me if you see Bong break the first item, or if you are directly involved in either of the second two items.

Mahalo,

Hanford

[ Edited by: hanford_lemoore on 2004-10-20 19:28 ]

You know I don't enter many thoughts regarding moderation or poster squabbles, but I mean - no jokes?

Not even the one he posted at the person who linked us to all of those awesome Tahiti photos?

You're the man here and Supreme Tiki, and I'm probably missing a lot of what's going on... but I haven't seen anything "mean," just really - really sarcastic.

The internet is a pretty pouty place these days and a little toughening isn't at all undesirable IMO.

I think he adds much more than he receives from the boards, but then, I don't get PMs and emails from disgruntled subscribers either.

And speaking of subscribers - can I send you money somehow without getting the gold star?

I grew to hate them in elementary school since I was the only boy ever in Mrs. Williams class to not get one.

(crummygoldstarsandstupidteacherspetsmmmmumblegrumble)

Yes, it's my problem but I'm comfortable with it.

Please PM'me with a way to do so and thanks again for this forum. I enjoy it a lot.

I hope I'm not overstepping any bounds here but since you didn't lock the topic down I assumed you were OK with some postings on it.

[ Edited by: pablus on 2004-10-20 19:34 ]

The rules are simple:

No jokes with new users, and no complaints from old ones.

Wow. Bong is my bud. He opened his home bar when I was visiting and treated me like royalty when I was in OC. I owe him a defense. Hey people, quit complaining about the Bong. He's like that demented Kahuna in "Bird of Paradise". Everyone fears his curse, but if you kick him off the island the volcano may blow up. Remember that.
Luv,
KG

[ Edited by: kailuageoff on 2004-10-20 19:25 ]

Please BONG aim all of your jokes at me
Whether or not it pertains to me
Or even if it makes sense
For EYE will never complain

There only two things I don't like about Bong
And I can't talk about either of them, in mixed company.

I love Bong and think that no matter what he has done
We all need that red headed step child to run away from

Bong please call me at home and make fun of me off line

I am so sad that it has come to this

When this stops being fun
It's our fault
Have no brakes Cannot stop
Happydog (What can I do?)

[ Edited by: thebaxdog on 2004-10-20 20:37 ]

It is 100% within Bong’s own power to stay on Tiki Central and not get banned. It’s all in his hands.

Feel free to PM me if you see Bong break the first item, or if you are directly involved in either of the second two items.

Hanford

It doesnt really sound like its all in his hands. If somebody has a hard on for Bong then its open season on him? All a sniveler has to do is run to you and complain.
Bong contributes a great deal to Tiki Central. I would hate to see him banned. I remember when I first met him. I was a newby reading all these "tiki Bong posts" and was alittle intimidated. Then I went to an Oasis and recognized the infamous tiki Bong. You know what, I went up to him and introduced myself. We had drinks and conversation. We became friends. He talks the talk and walks the walk. He's not some phoney or two faced jerk. All these people who have claimed being slammed by Bong... have they ever actually met him and talked with him in person? A person can miss alot in translation in posting with somebody else. Like personality, a smile, a frown, a wink of an eye or other gesture, their background, their history, their humor . Its easy to misconstrue things if you dont know a person. I didnt feel I had to or needed to defend him . Hell, he can certainly defend himself. I just wanted too. Thats what a friend does.
Aloha.

Yeah me too. I like Bong. I think he's funny. Lately I haven't seen anything here which would cause him to be a problem, but I don't see or hear everything.
Sometimes newbies are a little sensitive as they want to be accepted into the group, that's understood.

Stay cool and Aloha.

I'm just a happy kid, stuck with the heart of an old punk...

You know, since the big political "art or politics" thread about a year ago, and the 'hippocratic lean' thereafter, I have been a very, very quiet -but old- TC member. I drop in occasionally and stay far away from that dreaded "Beyond Tiki" section (unless the thread pertains to hot rods!).

But I will say that I agree that this is an "open season" on Bong, if what you have posted is the law. And I don't think that an open invitation to anyone to complain is an appropriate or fair measure to be taken.

I'm all in favor of counseling where counseling is needed...but come on, we're all adults here! If we can't take an occasional joke or sarcasm, then maybe we need to look into other forms of communication.

I mean, all these words and text really doesnt do much to express what I'd like for it to. People can construe things many different ways.

I deal in facts and evidence in my occupation. And I hate to see anyone booted from our family. That IS what this site is to me, by the way, a family.
I would venture than many of you feel the same way.
And in any family, we will argue and debate with our siblings. It happens.

But Hanford, people come to this site because it's a place that they feel connected, yet disconnected from the real world. We come here because we love the site and the fellowship of conversing with others who understand and share our interest. We often come here because our spouses or friends think we're insane or obsessed. No one judges us here because we all love the culture. It's family.
Man, I just hate to see anyone be thrown out of this family. Because, you know what? I could be next. Hell, anyone of us could be next. And I know how that would make me feel. I would not wish that depression on anyone.

But, as has been said already, it's your site, your field, your game Hanford and we must play by your rules. I have and will continue to respect that in deep appreciation that this site exists.

But it is my sincerest hope that you are just a little frustraited at the present time and that you will find it in your heart to be generous. Don't throw out someone who genuniely loves this site.

And if you absolutely feel the need to boot a member of the family, then so be it. But please don't just offer up an opportunity for anyone to 'play god' here. It should be your decision and yours alone. (With respect to the moderators, of course.)

Just my two cents. Take it or leave it.

Respectfully.

this is very sad. AHHHHHHHH

I like Bong!!!!!!! Bong is funny!!!!

Ya know what Hanford? After reviewing many of the recent Bong posts, I'll say this:

If you feel the need to boot Bong off the site, then go ahead and boot me off too.

It should take no more effort on your part and it will leave me with some dignity.

I sincerely hope that I am not be the only older member to feel this strongly about the issue!

I mean, what the hell am I missing here?

Bong is loved!

Bong was one of the first members of TC that we met. He welcomed us with open arms. He really IS a nice guy and we agree that sometimes things can be taken the wrong way. But there is room for everyone here.

We love Bong and we hope this all works out. We would hate to lose a good friend from this site.

'OnaTiki & Moki

I have been enjoying Bong's recent absurdist posts quite thoroughly. But I have not seen anything (recently) mean-spirited, but then maybe it has already been deleted so I will never know what transpired and how things came to this point. Oh well. Can everyone just behave (Bong) and not be too sensitive (Newbies)?

I am a Bong fan, but I am not a fan of some of the things Bong does.

You have to understand that you are not privy to all the complaints that Hanford has to field and respond and react to.

Bong has created a lot of work for Hanford. A lot of ruffled feathers to smooth out. Hanford has put up with this, and has asked Bong to be a bit more considerate. Bong has said he would. Bong has broken his word to Hanford over and over and over again.

Damn straight I don't like this. I think this is bullcrap. But it's a mistake to think this is bullcrap of Hanford's making.

We all love Bong. We all love Hanford.
Period.
Bong gets the clue.
Now Tiki Central moves on.
Mai Tais For Everyone! YAAAAA!!!!

I agree with Unga Bonga.

Hanford provides a Great site for everyone to enjoy, and asks very little in return. So when he does ask, perhaps it is important for all of us to respect his request.

Unlike most sites and message boards, this one has very few rules, flames, negativity and thread wars. I hope it stays that way. Hanford obviously feels this step is necessary to keep the "aloha" spirit.

This sites history and his current actions have never given me a reason to second guess him.

On 2004-10-20 21:38, Tiki_Bong wrote:
I'm just a happy kid, stuck with the heart of an old punk...

That's no excuse Bong. I think it's time to strap you into a chair, attach some eyelid clamps and perform some Clockwork Orange style behavior modification therapy on ya. You'll have to watch "Suburbia","Decline of Western Civilization" and "Repo Man" completely SOBER until you're cured!

:drink:?

[ Edited by: marshhouse on 2004-10-21 04:51 ]

I think the people who complain to Hanford actually have the most soul-searching to do? Why can't they send Bong a personal message if they feel aggrieved? Better still, complain on the board and get the issue out in the open?

It saddens me that a few grown adults are unable to fight their own battles and have to resort to the tactics of the school sneak.
Why burden Hanford with these issues when there are two excellent direct routes where the person who has caused offense gets the message straight away?

Trader Woody

Bong just called me ugly. :)

don't listen, flounder, you're actually quite pretty

"Bong just called me ugly."

And your point is ?

Hey, how much would it cost me to run another Banner
ad on the opening page and on the new sign up page?

To all old and new members
The comments and ranting of member Tiki_Bong
should be ignored at all cost.
His commentary is his own and does not express the
opinion of this board or it’s members.
If you so choose to engage with Tiki_Bong
you will do so at your own risk.
Please do not complain to the Owner of this site or
it’s moderators for we already know that
the RUM has taken his last remaining brain cell
left over from years of pipe abuse
Again please ignore anything Tiki_Bong says !

However this turns out, I don't think Hanford should be criticized for trying to keep things in line.

Like most TCers, I also like Tiki Bong. He was the very first person to contact me when I introduced myself, and he said some very nice things about the art I posted. He can be funny, although I admit, his recent posts are way over my head. :)

Like most TCers, I have also witnessed and even been the target of some of his negative comments. I have usually responded to him directly through the forum itself. It never occured to me to complain to Hanford about it.

I don't think Bong should get a free ride, just because he's been here so long. I'm glad Hanford is strong enough to lay down the law. He has created a very unique place that does not contain all the negativity that a lot of other forums have. People are usually free to express themselves without the worry of being teased. It is good of him to keep it in check.

All that being said, I truley hope Tiki Bong does not leave, either on his own or by the hand of Hanford. He, for the most part, is one of the members that gives TC a unique personality. Boy, does he have personality! :lol:

[ Edited by: finkdaddy on 2004-10-21 07:59 ]

Bong has never abused me, and somehow I feel left out. I was hoping someday to fall into his bad graces just so I could sit back and enjoy the abuse. If he's booted before I'm abused, where am I to turn?

Seriously though, having a cynical mind and a sarcastic tongue is hardly a shooting offense in my opinion. As abuse goes, I don't think Bong's is the worst I've ever seen.

I think you do a great job running the boards, and IMHO the well and fairly enforced religion/politics bans keep about 99% of controversial threads out of the forums - life is a challenge, and dealing with people like Bong is all part of it, they're the one's that make life just that much more interesting.

Cheers!

Cybertiki, your ugly.

On 2004-10-21 00:36, hiltiki wrote:
I agree with Unga Bonga.

I agree with hiltiki.

Long ago I asked a mutual acquaintance, “what the $*&#%@ is up with that guy tiki bong? ” He then launched into a tale of , actually, what a nice guy bong really is. He recounted many good times at events, as well as personal dealings. He said that before he met him in person, he thought he was a real bastard. But, after meeting him, he said that it changed the whole feel of the posts he was reading. Trusting this third party, I decided to go back and re-visit some of the offending posts, but imagining a smirk on bongs face. It changed everything. The vitriolic outbursts became a sublime form of comedy. A big problem with the printed word, is it has no face, no que as to if it is a sarcastic barb or downright mean spirited insult. If you were to read a transcription of any of my bands practices, you would think we were all assholes who hated each other, but if you were actually there you would be laughing your ass off. Sure some times lines get crossed, but if no one ever crossed the line, we would all still think the earth was flat. If we all stood neatly behind the line, there would be no space flight. If we all carefully stayed in our place, there would have been no exploration, no voyages of discovery. When you think about it, the whole Tiki "scene" is an an insult to some people. If we all kept our mouths shut, afraid we might offend, there would be no Tiki Bars, no Tiki mugs, no Tiki culture. So are we going to sit idly by as our entire identity is taken away because some people can’t take a joke? Are we ready to give up freedom just to be safe from the threat of feeling as though a joke was made at our expense? Are you ready to destroy all things Tiki because some find our cartoon Ku’s to be an outrage? I say, lets all raise an offensive Tiki mug to say, let bong be bong, and Let TC be free!

http://www.tikiking.com Neat Tiki and Ukulele Stuff
http://tikiking.iuma.com Hear the King sing!

[ This Message was edited to re-insert possibly offensive words by: Tiki King on 2004-10-21 09:10 ]

[ Edited by: Tiki King on 2004-10-21 09:33 ]

Tiki King, very, very well said. :drink:

In person, Bong is undoubtedly one of the coolest and nicest guys you'll EVER meet in you life! And I can see the entertainment value of his posts, for him and us :D

I agree with Hanford...and Bong...and TikiKing.....guess I can't take a side on this one. What happens, happens.

Bong is a big boy, and he knows how it works or he wouldn't do what he does. When he writes something, does he honestly believe that we all understand that he is just some strange sarcstic comic? Of course not, that's why he does it. I don't think that we should all meet him just to find out how sweet and cuddly he is. That's absurd. Things he writes are offensive to people. He knows that. That's why he does it. The whole "Oh, that's just Bong. He's really a nice guy" excuse is just that: an excuse.

Please understand, he does not offend me. I do find him humorous. I think he is a huge asset to this site. I think he has some genuinely nice things to say. I think that among all the self-proclaimed tikiphilles, he is one of the most sincere. I want his band to play at one of my parties. I believe it would be a crime to exclude him from the site based on complaints by newbies who don't know the site. When I first came here, he greeted me warmly and sincerely and was one of the reasons I wanted to stay. I would love to meet him in person. I need to see for myself what kind of person starts such strange threads! :lol:

Tiki Bong is a big boy, he doesn't need defending. He does what he does because he wants to, and he knows there may be consequences for doing so. This is not a completely open site, there are rules and boundries, and Bong knows that.

So please Tiki Bong, just mellow a bit. I really do want you to play at my place next year, so I hope we can work that out. I think it would be a great time!

Everyone please take a deep breath and don't let this become a bashing thread for either Hanford or Bong.

You know he is somewhere reading all of this and just laughing his head off! :wink:

[ Edited by: finkdaddy on 2004-10-21 10:03 ]

[ Edited by: finkdaddy on 2004-10-21 11:44 ]

On 2004-10-21 08:32, FLOUNDERart wrote:
Cybertiki, your ugly.

... and DAMNED proud of it!

Cheers!

What the hey,

If Hanford wants me out of the general population, then I guess it's just a trend. You see, I was diagnosed with Lou Gehrig's disease and will be leaving in the near future anyways (oddly enough, I never even played baseball!).

But in the meantime, I'll make sure I got the rules correct:

1. No posting anything to new members.
2. No joking with old members.
3. Don't post anything to members I've offended in the past that could somehow possibly be construed as offensive to their prudent sensibilities (?).

I think I can do that.

This kind of feels like I'm the only member in some sort of AA group. And there's a bunch of counselors standing around, observing me with great self-interest waiting for me to fornicate up so they can squash my head. Or not.

Hey! I've got a great idea. You now how you're supposed to, like, punch a bag when you'd really rather knock the shi#, er, poo poo out of someone?

Well, I think that when I feel the inner-urge (not that one) to, what's the e-word?, FLAME!! someone, I'll just create a fake TC newbie to FLAME!! Sort of like creating a alter-ego to absorb my unrelenting abuse.

What should I call this alter-ego? I think I'll name him/her/it "Generic Tiki Newbie".

Watch for the action soon!

Oh yeah, about that Lou Gehrig's diagnosis. It was only for literary effect for this post (mi malo). But it COULD happen. I did play little league back in 1969.

That's about enough! I played little league too, and how DARE you insinuate that I may have some sort of disease! I'm telling Hanford! I'm telling Hanford!

I'm just kidding of course. Please don't report me.

On 2004-10-21 09:08, Tiki King wrote:
let bong be bong, and Let TC be free!

I with that!

On 2004-10-21 11:16, Tiki_Bong wrote:
.

You see, I was diagnosed with Lou Gehrig's disease and will be leaving in the near future anyways (oddly enough, I never even played baseball!).

As someone who has a family member stricken with this disease , I didnt find that funny. Have you had to watch as a loved one wastes away and know there is nothing to be done, why not make light of cancer next?
Maybe thats the type of thing Hanford is refering to. Think before you type. I dont believe it is my place to report you or anyone elses. I am sure your a decent guy. Just my 2 cents.

If I had to explain it, You still wouldnt get it

[ Edited by: rodeotiki on 2004-10-21 13:40 ]

And what about Lou Gehrig getting Lou Gehrig's Disease? What are the chances of that!? I'm sure his parents went, "Oh My God, our son has Lou Gehrig's Disease!". Duh! - You shouldn't have named him Lou Gehrig then should've you? In my opinion, Lou Gehrig's parents were just asking for trouble giving him that name...

Oh. And Bong - if you won't mellow out a bit for your sake or Hanford's sake, then do it for our sakes. We love you too much to lose you. I mean that with all my heart.

Sabu

See. And now I've unwittingly offended my good friend Rodeotiki with my Lou Gehrig joke. (Sorry about that Rodeo.)

Yes, humor is a dicey business at best. I feel for you, Bong.

I agree that I didn't like when Bong was making fun of me because I was new and especially because I am french, but I played his game and didn't let him having fun of me.
Now, I think that would be a bad idea to bannish him, because I like having digital fights with him, and what is the meaning of a perfect tiki world without the fu**ing punks to makes some troubles and mess around.
When I'm looking at his old threads where he says that french are stupid or whatever, I really think that's funny, and I take it in a second degree...even if he thinks it.
Love to Bong.

This seems unfair to me. Bong is judged and warned in public on this forum for his actions while the complainers and / or accusers are not. We don't even know who it was who complained.

I understand that you gave him private warnings in the past Hanford. I understand that you should inform him privately if people complain about him. And I can understand you are getting tired of receiving complaints and that you wanted to give him a final warning.

(Although I still can't understand why people are complaining about him. I guess there will always be the "sensitive" folks on any forum.)

But, I don't like the way you gave him "one last chance" in front of all his friends instead of warning him privately one last time.

If I were Bong I probably would have said "later" to Tiki Central at this time. But his response shows that he really loves this forum and especially the people on it. I admire him for that and for the way he reponded to this public warning with humor instead of getting nasty.

Hanford, I hope that you don't take this personally. I don't mean it as a personal "jab" but I just wanted to air my feelings on this.

Sure hope Lou Gehrig or anyone in his immediate, or not so immediate family (like a member of the L.G. fan club, or L.G. disease foundation) isn't a TC member. Does it count if someone who knows Kevin Bacon (who of course knows Lou Gehrig) is a new TC'r that was just offended? Hey that's me!

Duck season. No, Rabbit season,
NO, BONG SEASON!

On 2004-10-21 12:10, John Doe Tiki wrote:
Sure hope Lou Gehrig or anyone in his immediate, or not so immediate family (like a member of the L.G. fan club, or L.G. disease foundation) isn't a TC member. Does it count if someone who knows Kevin Bacon (who of course knows Lou Gehrig) is a new TC'r that was just offended? Hey that's me!
Duck season. No, Rabbit season,
NO, BONG SEASON!

New member? RIGHT. Bong, is this you? :)

Absolutely NOT! I am new to the TC boards and just had to register when I saw the "Lions & Christian" activity going on here. Or is this the 2004 version of "The Crucible"?

And I'm quite offended being a new TC'r to be compared to this "BONG" character. I hope this is not some sort of joke being played on me being a new TC'r and all. Is there someone/where I can formally make a complaint?

On 2004-10-21 09:08, Tiki King wrote:
Long ago I asked a mutual acquaintance, “what the $*&#%@ is up with that guy tiki bong? ” He then launched into a tale of , actually, what a nice guy bong really is. He recounted many good times at events, as well as personal dealings. He said that before he met him in person, he thought he was a real bastard. But, after meeting him, he said that it changed the whole feel of the posts he was reading. Trusting this third party, I decided to go back and re-visit some of the offending posts, but imagining a smirk on bongs face. It changed everything. The vitriolic outbursts became a sublime form of comedy. A big problem with the printed word, is it has no face, no que as to if it is a sarcastic barb or downright mean spirited insult. If you were to read a transcription of any of my bands practices, you would think we were all assholes who hated each other, but if you were actually there you would be laughing your ass off. Sure some times lines get crossed, but if no one ever crossed the line, we would all still think the earth was flat. If we all stood neatly behind the line, there would be no space flight. If we all carefully stayed in our place, there would have been no exploration, no voyages of discovery. When you think about it, the whole Tiki "scene" is an an insult to some people. If we all kept our mouths shut, afraid we might offend, there would be no Tiki Bars, no Tiki mugs, no Tiki culture. So are we going to sit idly by as our entire identity is taken away because some people can’t take a joke? Are we ready to give up freedom just to be safe from the threat of feeling as though a joke was made at our expense? Are you ready to destroy all things Tiki because some find our cartoon Ku’s to be an outrage? I say, lets all raise an offensive Tiki mug to say, let bong be bong, and Let TC be free!

---

http://www.tikiking.com Neat Tiki and Ukulele Stuff
http://tikiking.iuma.com Hear the King sing!

[ This Message was edited to re-insert possibly offensive words by: Tiki King on 2004-10-21 09:10 ]

[ Edited by: Tiki King on 2004-10-21 09:33 ]

Tiki King, you are the King-what you wrote is pure royalty.
When is your next party?--Wait, maybe you should throw one for Bong!!
http://www.tikicentral.com/viewtopic.php?topic=11381&forum=4&0

On 2004-10-21 12:44, John Doe Tiki wrote:
Absolutely NOT! I am new to the TC boards and just had to register when I saw the "Lions & Christian" activity going on here. Or is this the 2004 version of "The Crucible"?

And I'm quite offended being a new TC'r to be compared to this "BONG" character. I hope this is not some sort of joke being played on me being a new TC'r and all. Is there someone/where I can formally make a complaint?

" Public warning to Unga Bunga; everyone please read......"