These are a few of my favorite holiday gripes...

Thought we could start a forum to discuss those holiday annoyances we could do without...

I'll start...what the hell is the deal with Mannheim Steamroller? That is without a doubt some of the foulest "music" I've ever heard...who buys that shit and why? Of all the decent Christmas music that has been recorded why would someone want to listen to synthesized orchestal interpretations of Christmas carols?

No way ...

Mannheim Steamroller is cool. Especially when you discover that the main person behind this group was C.W. McCall, the exact same person who had the 1975 trucking song that hit the top of the charts ...... and breaker one nine, I'm a talkin to you, cause the name of that song was ....... Convoy!!!!

'Cause we got a little convoy
Rockin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a little convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?

Some people think that Christmas is about elegance, and grace, and the redemption of the human race through the birth of Jesus. And there are others who appreciate Christmas because of the pure excess of consumerism and gliterry tinsely gloss.

As I get older, I'm appreciating the latter more and more .... and I love the fact that a guy can start his recording career with a trucker novelty song, and veer of the interstate and make a musical career change by veering 180 degrees into the Xmas synthesizer world. It is kind of like Mark Mothersbaugh going from being the guy responsible for the songs of DEVO, to doing music for a popular children's cartoon animation show, but even more warped.

There are some things about the holiday that I do hate, and as soon as think of some I'll post them. (O.K. I thought of one .... how come the cool wrapping paper with the cool sixties/Shag designs are really expensive, and the dollar a roll stuff at the Dollar Stores looks like crap)

27 more shopping days, before I truck this convoy across the U.S.A.

10-4 good buddy,
Vern

Mannheim Steamroller!! AAAAAAAggggggghhhhhh!! It's like being caught in a traffic jam in the middle of Disney's "Electrical Parade"! It is as evil as Techno as far as I'm concerned.

My other Christmas music wonderment are non Christian performers selling oodles of Christmas CDs (like Barbara Streisand, Neil Diamond) and the other bandwagon albums such as RAS Records "A Very Reggae Christmas." Rasta-far-i? :music: 'tis the season for consumers... :music:

My personal Christmas annoyance are people who every year have a "theme" in their decorating, Holiday wrap and matching Christmas Cards. I think it's time to get a new hobby :roll:

Thanks for this topic, I feel better already!

[ Edited by: stuff-o-rama on 2004-11-26 23:58 ]

I've never understood why so many people on TC are so violently opposed to certain forms of music. I have likes & dislikes as well, but I've never really gone out of my way to bash any style because it just might alienate someone. I try to find good music in just about every genre out there, be it Techno, Rockabilly, Jazz, funk, etc ... and yes, even Pop.

Now Barbara Streisand, she just needs to die a slow, painful death. but that's another story...

-Z

Don't provoke my wrath by bad-mouthing the Main Street Electrical Parade music.

Don Dorsey composed that piece.

If you don't appreciate the Moog Synthisizer goodness that the MSEP theme is, try threading a thru-line from the space-age pop of Cal Tjader and Esquivel.

The Moog sound is inextricably linked to the space-pop music scene, and Dorsey's composition for Disney is a whirring masterwork that combines 30 or so Disney themes in a synchronized rondelay. It all works like a musical swiss watch, with the main theme providing the background upon which each float introduces its own variation. All the music was originally played through a multi-track audio tape so all the multiple tracks ran in perfect synch and stayed in synch for a 20 minute parade. No mean feat in the pre-digital era.

All music is interrelated. To broaden your definition of "good" music and "bad" music, one only needs to thread the relationships from a form they know, to one that's less familliar.

The MSEP theme is a jewel of Space Age Pop. The fact that it's still running makes it something like the Enchanted Tiki Room at Disneyland. A piece of the past, still being enjoyed today, and for all the same reasons why the past was fun.

Okay now that we've heard both sides on the Mannheim Steamroller topic I almost have an understanding of why people can have an appreciation for the humans responsible for making such music but, I still don't get it!

Stuff-O, I'd have to agree with you on the RAS Christmas album! Except for Freddie McGregor's "Oh Come Let Us Adore Him," the album sucks. If you want a decent reggae Christmas album you should go for Reggae Christmas From Studio One, actually more of a ska/rocksteady album. It's even got a song by the Wailers - "Sound the Trumpets" that in my opinion is damn cool and recorded when Bob, Peter, Bunny and the rest of the crew were still Christians. Not to discuss religion here but Rastafarians still have an appreciation and understanding of the ideals and teachings of Jesus Christ, so for them to record Christmas songs is not really that far of a stretch as opposed to Barb Streisand recording them...

Besides music, what else about the holidays sucks?

I have a few grips about retail stores.

1. I don't want to hear Christmas music until after Thanks-giving.
2. seeing Christmas trees all decked out on the sales floor by Halloween
3. early bird, door busters or what-have-you sales that turn the average shoppers into mob like mentality. I went to one of those just once and I swear to you it was worse than the days of when my husband and I used to go to general admission concerts to see 7 or 8 name bands back in the old days! Talk about pushing shoving and trampling!
   I'd also like to add a grip from the other side of the cash register.
   I worked in retail where Christmas sales of trees and decorations were a major part of our take for the year. Crabby, demanding, rude, people who are just looking to blow up at some poor sales clerk who doesn't really have it coming to them.It was even worse as manager when it's your fault for everything. I know that sometimes you get that clerk that is dumb as a box of rocks, but most times clerks above school age do care. After almost 20 years in retail I had to quit, I was really starting to hate Christmas (gasp!) and people in general.
   (deep breath) ahhh, I feel so much better. Thanks for letting me vent.

I hate when I am putting up light strings and have to use a staple gun to secure a spot where a clip won't work if I miss getting the light cord centered perfectly and squeeze off a staple right through the electrical wiring.

On 2004-11-28 09:31, exotica59 wrote:
I went to one of those just once and I swear to you it was worse than the days of when my husband and I used to go to general admission concerts to see 7 or 8 name bands back in the old days! Talk about pushing shoving and trampling!

I fail to understand why anyone would want to camp out overnight to be the first in line at Wal-Mart, so they could buy some more cheap plastic crap they don't need. I was in Sacramento for Thanksgiving and this was the top story on the local news. WHY?!?

This year my employer has decided to shut down for the week between Christmas and New Years. We get the whole week off, but it's UNPAID. If we want to get paid for that week, we have to take vacation.

Also, see https://tikicentral.com/viewtopic.php?topic=11925&forum=6&vpost=126418 for my rant about my neighbors who never take down their holiday decorations.

On 2004-11-26 23:57, stuff-o-rama wrote:
Mannheim Steamroller!! AAAAAAAggggggghhhhhh!! It's like being caught in a traffic jam in the middle of Disney's "Electrical Parade"! It is as evil as Techno as far as I'm concerned.

I like the Manheim Steamroller stuff! But then again, I have a velcro wallet...

On 2004-11-27 08:04, Feelin' Zombified wrote:
I've never understood why so many people on TC are so violently opposed to certain forms of music. I have likes & dislikes as well, but I've never really gone out of my way to bash any style because it just might alienate someone. I try to find good music in just about every genre out there, be it Techno, Rockabilly, Jazz, funk, etc ... and yes, even Pop.

Sorry, I didn't mean to offend or tell people their taste in music sucked, I was saying that they were annoying to me. I worked in a record store as a music buyer for 14 years and we had to listen to all of those records non-stop. I guess too much of a good thing can drive you to insanity after a while. We sold those LPs and CDs by the truck load... I guess I should have stated that before hand. I have nothing against reggae or Barbara Streisand, I was just pointing out how it seemed odd for artists who are very vocal about their faith would record a Christian themed album (this statement is not an attack on religion). :)

On 2004-11-27 08:45, BarkerBird wrote:
If you don't appreciate the Moog Synthisizer goodness that the MSEP theme is, try threading a thru-line from the space-age pop of Cal Tjader and Esquivel.

I love Esquivel, space-age pop and have even played a Walter/Wendy Carlos album or two!

Sorry if I started this out on a bad note...

I work across the street from the local Mall. To begin with I hate Malls and avoid entering them to the greatest extent possible. I don't like crowds, noise, traffic, parking problems (not so much walking distances from the door but waiting for people who block parking lanes so that they can save 10 feet of walking or whatever!), overpriced mall consumer goods, consumer debt, and most trends. Or department store perfumes, which make me nauseous.

Now, when x-mas season kicks into high gear, the Mall-goers (for lack of a more offensive term) add time to my commute time by polluting my simple commute with their Mall-going cars. For a green arrow that is only green for less than 5 seconds, and exactly 90 seconds between lights, waiting behind a line of 20 cars (3 or 4 light rotations, easily) just to get to work, really chaps my hide!

The interesting dynamics though are that the bulk of December is crap getting to work. But there is a strange lull in traffic - to make a gender assumption based upon personal experience and researched newspaper articles, it appears the women folk finish their shopping the last weekend before x-mas. men don't start until Dec. 24. Thus, there is a lull in mall traffic from the Monday prior to x-mas through the 23rd. This is the best time to go to the mall (or work, for me).

I guess everyone can't be as cool as us and get holiday gifts online, on e-bay, at thrift or antique stores, or make them by hand...

Sorry if I started this out on a bad note...

No problem. You know, I forgot the smiley myself.

Mainly I was using your point to talk about what I love about the Main Street Electrical Parade theme. Everyone has different tastes.

I think the nature of this thread is kind of a gripe session anyway. Someone is bound to gripe about SOMETHING that someone else likes.

Back on topic, what's my Christmas gripe?

I like the things most people probably hate about christmas. I love the crowds, the malls, the whole crazy mess of it all. I'll keep my gripe to the music department as well.

Paul McCartney. I love you, man. You're the best thing to happen to music in my lifetime. But "Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time" blows.

About july every year, I finally get the repeating loop of the chorus out of my head. I time my enjoyment of the holiday season by how late in the year I first hear that song.

Sorry Paul, but you wrote a song surpassed only by "it's a small world" as a brain-addling earworm.

Next time, not so many repetitions in a song, thanks!

Christmas music in Ralphs grocery stores starting in October. That's gotta be the topper.

My Thanksgiving newspaper was 2/3 advertising.

I do have a gripe about getting an ad too late, though: Fry's Electronics in San Diego had a Friday-Only sale that I didn't get the ad for 'til Friday. $149.99 for a digital video camera, $99.99 for a PC, $19.99 for a DVD burner, a Microwave oven that's free after rebate...

More peeves:

Radio stations that change their format to all-Christmas music before Thanksgiving

the "Fireplace Channel" on TV

cutesy sequined sweatshirts worn by older women in the suburbs

On 2004-11-28 18:04, dangergirl299 wrote:
Now, when x-mas season kicks into high gear, the Mall-goers (for lack of a more offensive term) add time to my commute time by polluting my simple commute with their Mall-going cars.

I totally agree Dangergirl. No matter where I have lived traffic around Christmas is really frieghtening. I have to assume all of those people running red lights, tailgating, not using turn signals, making illeagal turns or just not paying attention to the fact their vehicle is crossing into another lane are consumed with the joy or running up huge debts at the Mall.

Not that these bad driving behaviors don't manifest themselves at other times. It's just ten times worse during the Christmas shopping rush. Be careful everyone. Better yet stay home and shop on e-bay!
KG

[ Edited by: Kailuageoff on 2004-11-29 15:49 ]

On 2004-11-29 15:48, Kailuageoff wrote:
I have to assume all of those people running red lights, tailgating, not using turn signals, making illeagal turns or just not paying attention to the fact their vehicle is crossing into another lane are consumed with the joy or running up huge debts at the Mall.

[ Edited by: Kailuageoff on 2004-11-29 15:49 ]

Some of those insane maneuvers are us local folk just trying to make it to work on time! The x-mas traffic started here today - I had to run a red light practically, on my way back in from lunch.

I hate the remark that people hate the commercialism. They actually market things to people who hate the commercialism now. I don't remember it ever not being the commercial event of the year.

On 2004-11-29 14:25, cynfulcynner wrote:
the "Fireplace Channel" on TV

The Fireplace Channel Rocks!!
I use my "picture in picture" feature that I have(that came with my TV)and watch the Fireplace channel with the Weather channel.
Let the good times roll!!

On 2004-11-29 14:25, cynfulcynner wrote:
More peeves:
the "Fireplace Channel" on TV

We call that the Pyromaniac's FIRE channel, since it's just the flames, no fireplace, nor logs, in evidence. Have you ever seen it when the flames start to go low and sluggish?

On 2004-11-28 10:54, 8FT Tiki wrote:
I hate when I am putting up light strings and have to use a staple gun to secure a spot where a clip won't work if I miss getting the light cord centered perfectly and squeeze off a staple right through the electrical wiring.

Especially when you got the damn cord plugged in...ouch!

On 2004-11-29 22:00, Gigantalope wrote:
I hate the remark that people hate the commercialism. They actually market things to people who hate the commercialism now. I don't remember it ever not being the commercial event of the year.

Without a doubt. We even market to people who hate the remark that people hate commercialism because they actually market things to people who hate the commercialism now.! (All things to all people man.)

Back to the topic, I agree with Cyn on this one - images of people being herded into Walmart so they can fight over useless plastic crap is neither news worthy nor sponge worthy.

Holiday complaints huh?

Parking spaces at the mall. People fighting over a spot 3 spaces closer to the door than the one thats open. "hey numnuts, that extra 10 feet ain't gonna kill ya, and besides, by the looks of things you could use a little exercise".

Weird hillbilly mountain men going to the mall because its x-mas. People that don't normally shop at the mall so they have no mall etiquette. "excuse me sir, that shopping cart from Bed Bath and Beyond is not meant to take thru the rest of the mall.

Santas that are not old white guys. I'm all for equal rights, womens rights, but the legend of Santa Claus is an old German fat guy with a beard, not some chinese guy, a black guy or some woman that has something to prove.

Seeing X-mas decorations before halloween. Hey you greedy assclowns, quit rushing things. We all no you want to make an extra dollar, but I love Halloween and the x-mas lights aisle in October is taking up space that could be used for a zombie, a Frankenstien mask or a pumpkin.

99% of all X-mas music makes my skin crawl. I truly believe there are only about 20 x-mas songs, different artists just keep re-doing them. If it ain't the Brain Setzer X-mas album, Sintra or Dean, I don't wanna hear it. If I gotta hear Mariah Carey or kenny G someone is gonna get a sharpened candy cane in the eye.

The numnut neighbors that leave there lights on all night and frickin flashing lights shine thru my windows like the neon sign on a cheap motel.

With that said, Happy Holidays.

am i the only one who likes to listen to dean martin's christmas music year-round? :)

I'm also digusted by co-workers who want to "get in the spirit" and want everyone to wear a Santa hat...

Another gripe are little electric bell ringing things that are quite noisy and impossible to ignore..."They're so cute...I think I'll go on a murder spree"

Carolers too...comming around thinking themselves to be such songbirds and spreaders of joy. (and there is always one with a muffler and a top hat) Besides pretending not to be home, how do you react? Time moves glacially slow as they force onto you thier joy.

Bear traps on the lawn...that's what I need.

Little electronic toys, ties, cards, etc. that when pressed, play a Christmas song using only 3 notes and no sense of timing.

Xmas TV specials/movies that don't need to be remade yet again by this years' NBC cast (Kelsey Grammer, I'm looking in your direction).

The 100% Xmas radio stations that only play 2 songs. With all of the variety out there, why do the TWO Detroit Xmas stations (yes, TWO!) play the exact same limited playlist? So far I've heard Andy Williams' "It's The Holiday Season" & Amy Grants' "Most Wonderful Time of the Year" 50,000 times each. and ONLY those 2 songs.

Biggest gripe: "Don't spend alot on me, really!" ugh!

-Z

My personal way to fight the bah-hum-bugs is to play in a few TubaChristmas concerts. If any of you out there play tuba, baritone or euphonium, go for it. For everyone else, if you have not heard this before, it sounds sort of like a pipe organ playing Christmas Carols. It is great fun and so totally weird but good.

Find a concert in your area at:
http://www.tubachristmas.com/

When I see carollers coming. I hide. Can't they sense the feeling of dread as they approach every home? Dont they notice the pained, uncomfortable grin on the faces of their victims?

i like to think of carollers as mimes-that-sing. just as annoying, but louder.

On 2004-11-30 03:24, ErichTroudt wrote:
Holiday complaints huh?

Santas that are not old white guys. I'm all for equal rights, womens rights, but the legend of Santa Claus is an old German fat guy with a beard, not some chinese guy, a black guy or some woman that has something to prove.

Sorry, Santa Claus is based on an actual Bishop, made a Saint, Saint Nicholas. In my church we celebrate his name day Dec. 6 (my son's names day too) and our "Santa" actually dresses like a Bishop (if you really want to get technical) Traditionally gifts were exhanged on St. Nicholas Day leaving Christmas to celebrate the birth of Jesus. I actually think I'd like it better that way.
Here's a site about St. Nicholas
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/7175/stnich-page.html

Sorry, back to your griping and such, bah humbug

I always liked Charles Addams' take on how to deal with Christmas carolers:

http://www.cartoonbank.com/prints_addams.asp

(movie form):
http://www.geocities.com/~cousin_itt/a/a60.jpg

Does anyone go caroling anymore?

Another peeve: obnoxious Salvation Army bell-ringers. One tried to lay a big guilt trip on me last night, even after I told her I had given them a truckload of stuff this year (which is true).

Bytes my friend, that could possibly be the funniest thing I have heard this holiday season. I think I will be using that line. I'll give you credit of course.

Few more gripes.

Turkey for dinner. Didn't we just have that same exact meal last month. We go 10 months out of the year without this Dry bird and now we have to have it twice in a months time? People, lets make Ham the official X-mas meal.

The jerkweed neighbor who buys his kids a loud motorizred scooters or dirt bikes. So all x-mas afternoon you have to hear highpitched motorcycles going up and down the street all day and night. I can't wait for them to pile it up in the curb or for it to break 2 months later.

The relative that puts out "that" candy jar. You probably don't wanna be there in the first place so you think "that hard candy looks good, maybe I'll have some, hey, I like candy and maybe we'll get lucky I'll choke and we'll have to leave". Meanwhile when you open the jar and take a piece, it's one solid piece. Decoration Candy. That candy has been in that jar since Moses had short pants and it just gets packed and unpaked every year with the rest of the decorations.

The numnut neighbor that leaves up his lights all year round.

The holiday scented x-mas candle that actually smells a little more like salmon and burning tires than pine or cinamon.

Relatives that invite you over at 2:00pm but forget to mention they aren't cooking that dry bird until 7:00. "Hey pal, I got 17 other relatives I obligated to visit this weekend. hey, they candy in that jar will hold me over.......

we've never done xmas turkey, thxgiving is enuf

ham rocks for xmas!

Yeah, Laney, you're right about that Saint Nick.

But most malls aren't celebrating or portraying that particular Saint Nick.
They are portraying that "American version" of Saint Nick, the Dutch or German vision of Santa. The 1823 "The Night Before Christmas", the St. Nicholas from Harper's Magazine from the 1860's. the Coca Cola picture of Santa.

Bottom line here....Neither on of these Saint Nick, traditional or American version would have been a Woman or a chinese guy. I'm gonna pull a Will Farrell in Elf and attack the next Fake Looking Santa I see. "you're not santa, you smell like beef and cheese".

Ham Sucks.

On 2004-11-30 12:31, Feelin' Zombified wrote:
Ham Sucks.

you gonna hate on this?

ho boy!

ErichTroudt,you had me in hysterics over the "just one big ole piece of stale candy"business.Same thing with Moses in short pants-very clever.Keep them coming.

I'm good for Turkey at Christmas, since My thanksgiving was back at the beginning of October! Ham's good too.

I love to listen to strange songs come christmas time, I have a special list of alternative music I like to play at work.

Here are a few I'll keep on the server for the next 24 hours or so(e-mail me if you missed them)

Santa Has A Mullet
http://www.satin-moon.com/Nerf

I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
http://www.satin-moon.com/Gayla

I Am Santa Claus
http://www.satin-moon.com/Bob

On 2004-11-30 12:48, Johnny Dollar wrote:

On 2004-11-30 12:31, Feelin' Zombified wrote:
Ham Sucks.

you gonna hate on this?

ho boy!

You've never tried my Aunts' ham! year after year. Christmas. Easter. Graduations. Reunions. Birthdays. You see, her side dishes are the worst part, so I'm left eating only ham & bread. Every event at her house. I'll take a chunk O'Pig any day... just not the same old crap year after year.

-Z

Ever have a family gathering where the food was so offensive that you had to hit Taco Bell on the way home?

On 2004-11-30 13:47, Tikiwahine wrote:
]

I Am Santa Claus
http://www.satin-moon.com/Bob

:D !

Holiday newletters! All you want is for people to be truthful,not"Our oldest,Steve,is a strapping six footer who,when not quarterbacking the varsity team to an unbeaten record,is busy running the school paper,and dating Britney,the head cheerleader,who,by the way,starred in the student production of "Brigadoon",and could very well be on her way to a fabulous career on Broadway.Kimmy,our youngest,just made the honor roll again,and could be the next Heidi Klum-the talent scout said so."Blah,blah,blah.

I saw a flyer next to my local supermarket with this website on it:
http://www.adbusters.org/metas/eco/bnd/

I kinda like their idea of a Buy Nothing Day. I wouldn't mind if gifts were eliminated for the holidays (except for the kids, of course). There's already way to much stress in most of our lives and spending money we don't have for stuff we don't need just doesn't seem to enhance the holidays. It could still be a get-together family and friends time just like Thanksgiving, but without the stress and financial burden. I'd rather give gifts for birthdays anyway. Then you can focus on buying for only one person instead of thinking how if you buy for that person, then you also have to buy for this person even though you have no idea what they would like or could use. I know that the act of giving is a part of the holiday, but I just feel that giving should be done without expectation. People shouldn't feel obligated. If I do choose to give something I think someone could really use, I don't automatically expect something in return.

And, no, I'm not expecting any gifts myself. Frankly, I just don't have the room for any more stuff anyway. Sorry, don't mean to be all Bah Humbug about it, but I do wish the focus was a little more on the supposed peace and goodwill towards our fellow humans or helping those less fortunate instead of what gift can I afford that will impress my friend, sibling, lover, etc. I may not have much, but I am thankful for what I do have, which is more than what most people in the world have.

I agree with you Vintagegirl.

One year I thought it noble to make my family gifts; there were so many people to buy for and I was really broke that year, so I stayed up till past 3am Christmas eve baking. Christmas morning, I was pretty much panned by the whole lot of them and have never done it since. (Ingrates.)

Oh well.

On 2004-11-30 14:05, docwoods wrote:
"Our oldest,Steve,is a strapping six footer who,when not quarterbacking the varsity team to an unbeaten record,is busy running the school paper,and dating Britney,the head cheerleader,who,by the way,starred in the student production of "Brigadoon",and could very well be on her way to a fabulous career on Broadway."

I've done this with my holiday cards, but I wrote about my cats.

Bah Humbug!

They don't call me Becker for nothing!