Hawaiian Kahuna (Da REAL kine)

My wife and I just recently moved into a brand-new home in Makakilo Heights on the island of O'ahu. I'm not telling you this to brag - just to give the story some essential background. We are no better than anyone and damn lucky to be able to afford a house in this day and age. It is built on a hillside looking across a draw and down onto the ocean. We wanted to get the house blessed right after we moved in. I didn't want a Catholic priest or anything like that - nothing against Catholics or Christian priests, but I figured we're in Hawai'i, on stolen Hawaiian land (that's right-stolen), so we should have a real Hawaiian Kahuna come bless the house and rid the property of any departed Hawaiians or evil spirits that might want to take up residence in my soon-to-be- built Tiki Bar! The Kahuna shows up and immediately asks why the negative energy "ovah deah"... I said "Where?" He gestures toward the kitchen and says "Deah- you were arguing ovah deah befo I get here" ... As a matter of fact, Mrs. MTM and I were arguing about something stupid before he got there - and we were standing in the kitchen. What transpired after that was way too much to go into in detail here, but I will say it opened our eyes about many things. This Kahuna is a direct descendant of Kamehameha I (he can prove it). He said the reason he became a Kahuna is because his ancestors were Kahuna's to Kamehameha, but they were the "bad kine", He has "the gift" and wants to do good to try and offset the evil his ancestors did. Any other TCers have any experiences with a Kahuna before? There are lots of strange things here in Hawai'i. Definitely makes for interesting conversation!

Please continue...

Yeh, tell us about da house, we wanna know all about da kine ting, brah.

The Kahuna talked with us for a few minutes and then proceeded with his ceremony. He instructed my wife to stay on his right side and carry a large monkeypod bowl filled with some "blessed" water... he had two "ti" leaves in his right hand. We first stood at my front door, out on the porch. He began by dipping the ti leaves in the water and then sprinkling us with the water. Some of the water splashed off of me and a couple drops hit him. His eyes got huge and he stopped and looked at his arms which had gone "chicken skin" ... he said "That's on you, boo... someting's wrong wid you..." What a great way to start out. We went all around the outside of our house and to the edges of our property. While on the ground looking at the foundation of the home, he said that there had been "many arguements and disagreements among the builders about the way they were building our home and especially the foundation itself. I told him that was probably true, as they had many design-related issues that took a while for them to fix. He looked out at the land behind us into the small canyon, closed his eyes and told us that long ago their was a village there. Asked us if we knew who the "night marchers" were. We said that we did and he said not to be afraid of them, they are just "spirits on their way home". Said if we see them to just think good thoughts about them and to wish them well. Quite contrary to the traditional legends I've heard of the night marchers. After blessing the exterior of the house, we moved inside and he repeated the process in every room. In different places he told us of things (conversations, arguements, etc.) that had transpired there and WHEN. He was dead-on on every one of them. He gave us advice about living, our relationship and our place in the grand scheme of things. He noticed a very special tiki standing inside the front door a local friend of mine had carved me. He said "Do you know what that tiki means?" .. I told him it represents Wisdom. He said it did, and that the snarling visage means that it is yelling at everyone, telling them that it is for wisdom. "You must listen to this tiki and seek wisdom, for he demands it" ... I wasn't about to argue. So now we are safe from evil. We talked-story for about an hour after he finished and I learned a great deal about his family history, the way they view the current inhabitants of Hawai'i and heard some other pretty hair-raising ghost stories...

MTM, this is interesting stuff. I'd love to hear some of those stories he shared with you. How did you find this person?

We found him "local style" : if you want to know where to get something over here - ask someone. Literally anyone. Ask your neighbor, the checker at the market. If they don't know, they'll go right over to someone else and ask them for you... We asked a close family friend. Turns out she had just had the Kahuna bless her house as well.

I'll post some stories he told us, as well as some that I've gotten from other locals in a bit. The best part about these stories is that the people who told them to me actually experienced them.

MTM, this is interesting stuff. I'd love to hear some of those stories he shared with you. How did you find this person?

OK- The Kahuna travels all over the islands and the mainland helping people. On one trip to bless a house on the Big Island, he encountered a feeling he had never felt before. An overwhelming sense of evil. It was a very old house ... he felt as if he was being watched from the minute he got there. There were two pit bulls the owner kept in the yard and they were so scared they were in hiding, just whining - no bark. Finally he caught a glimpse of "whom" was watching him: it was actually many "entities" - he couldn't see them clearly but they were all gathering around him. He said he had never felt such an overwhelming hatred before. It took him hours to finish his work there- when he left there was no trace of the entities.

Another native Hawaiian friend of mine told me that his family lost a piece of land on the Big Island a couple of years back (some unscrupulous lawer engineered that deal). My friend's grandfather was buried on that piece of land some 60 years prior. The lawyer sold the property for several million and the new owner was preparing to put a condo complex on it. My friend intervened, citing the burial place, and the builder suggested they would build around it, or my friend could move the grave. They opted for the latter and re-located the grandfather to another family-owned parcel. Later that evening, my friend and his father were watching TV... the father had fallen asleep. My friend noticed a shadow come into the doorway and go behind him - he thought it was his cousin coming into the room. All of a sudden he felt large arms wrap around him and hold him tightly. He knew it wasn't the cousin- the arms were just shadows. He screamed, waking his dad, and told him what had just happened. His dad said "That's just your grandfather coming and thanking you for moving him. He won't be back again." My friend, obviously shaken, replied "He's got a funny way of showing his ALOHA..." My friend had never met his grandfather, but his dad told him that grandfather was a very big man. My friend said he felt that whatever it was that hugged him felt very very large...

There are more...

[ Edited by: MaiTaiMafia on 2004-12-20 01:24 ]

Well,you've got a great audience here for your stories,MTM!Always a good idea to have a house blessed.Tell more of these fascinating tales!

Hey MTM,
Just PMd ya...
Aloha,
:tiki:

The Kahuna's stories were spooky at the time, but I think the scariest stories are from one of my friends- another native Hawaiian that was born/raised here. Picture the setting in which he told me this tale: Friday night, about 11:30pm, he and a couple of other friends and I sitting in his garage talking-story (this is a typical Friday night out here - some good barbecue, a few Heinekens and talk-story... all in the garage/driveway of the house). Someone brought up the subject of Night Marchers or something and my friend starts telling the story of an incident that happened just after he graduated high school:

He and some friends were in a pick-up truck along with some beers and they were looking to go hang out somewhere in the country, drink some beer and talk story - normal stuff. My friend was in the passenger side of the truck, the driver was the only other one in the cab and there were three big local boys in the back(you can ride in the back of a pick-up truck here). As they headed out this one dirt road the driver and my friend both saw up at the edge of the light from their headlights, a white shape moving in the brush on the right side of the road. As the driver slowed down the shape came out and crossed the road to the left side. The truck was now stopped. The guys in the back had no idea what was going on. My friend told the driver to turn around and get out of there- which he started doing, and at the same time, the person in the bushes came back out to the center of the road, turned to face them and started moving towards them. Both my friend and the driver knew what they were looking at, O'ahu's infamous "White Lady". They finally got the car turned around and started heading down the road and now the occupants in the back could finally see why they had changed course so abruptly. They started pounding on the top of the truck and screaming like little girls "Hurry up! Hurry up! She's right behind us!!!". My friend, too scared to turn around (and also unable to see due to the fact that there was about 700lbs of big tough Hawaiian guys plastered against the back window of the truck, ventured a look out the passenger side mirror to see the horrifying image of the wraith rapidly closing on their vehicle. He said he didn't know how long she chased them but at some point she must have stopped because the guys in the back finally stopped screaming.

After hearing this story (and a few others) I had to drive myself home at about 1:30am in my Jeep that had the side curtains off - about 40 miles, through the haunted pineapple fields and along the lonely and very dark highway that runs along the North Shore to my then-home in Kahuku. I had chicken-skin the entire trip. What a freak-out!!! Their are white lady stories from almost everywhere in the world and most of them are great urban legends. But one look at my friend's face and the sound in his voice while he told this story and I am certain he actually experienced this. He's a very honest guy, father of two and doesn't need to make this stuff up. Other friends that were there in the garage had experienced some of these things with him as well...

[ Edited by: MaiTaiMafia on 2004-12-20 22:56 ]

[ Edited by: MaiTaiMafia on 2004-12-20 23:00 ]

Aloha Tiki Royale-

Got your PM - and sent one back to you-

Mahalo

MTM

Very interesting stuff.
Thanks for taking the time to scribe it for us.

I love these stories. You read the Glen Grant books?

What is the story behind the White Lady? Who was she? Why is she so angry, and what happens if she catches you?

Haunted Hawaii!http://www.carpenoctem.tv/haunt/hi/

[ Edited by: filslash 2008-09-13 11:36 ]

After hearing the stories my friend told me that night, I searched the web to see what I could find about ghostly legends of Hawaii. I've visited a few websites that have Hawaiian ghost legends on them. Some are pretty good- others are just warmed-over regurgitated data from someone else's website. I couldn't find any real history on the White Lady. Just that she has been a part of the lore here for a long, long time. There is a "Green Lady" also and there is a little more information on her. Supposedly she died of some illness years ago and she haunts a certain area around a local nursery.

My friend also told a story of a night he and some friends were hanging out on the grounds of a local high school. They were just talking in front of one of the buildings. He was facing the glass doors leading into the building and he noticed the specters of two elderly gentlemen staring at them through the glass. His friend noticed where he was looking and asked him "Do you see them?" to which my friend relied that he did. That made everyone else look and they all saw the two men standing in front of the door, peering out at them. After a few minutes, the ghosts turned and walked back into the building, out of the light. Apparently these spirits are quite familiar to people around there - they were once teachers or administrators at that school.

aloha,

Here's a website with a list of Haunted Hawaii!http://www.carpenoctem.tv/haunt/hi/

Boo!

I've seen this site before... it's one of the better ones.

I was thinking maybe the "White Lady" was just looking for a hug,..........and the big Hawaiian dudes were messin' their pants.

I was thinking maybe the "White Lady" was just looking for a hug,..........and the big Hawaiian dudes were messin' their pants.

Hah- You are more than welcome to come here and snuggle up with her!

I just got back from my first visit to Hawaii. My buddy and I slept in the rental Van along the North Shore of Oahu. We parked across from the Food Mart right next to shore. Now, I never saw anything, but for some reason, I was kinda skidish sleeping in the van.. could have been Da Hui, but maybe the White Lady. You're quite lucky to call Oahu your home. I was only there 4 days to film the Eddie and Pipeline Masters, but it was truly amazing. Great stories, you've got a talent for writing. The words are just flowing!

*On 2004-12-20 22:55, MaiTaiMafia wrote:*Their are white lady stories from almost everywhere in the world and most of them are great urban legends.

In Mexico she's called La Llorona. The story there is a woman killed herself and her children. When she got to the pearly gates she could not get in to be judged because her children hadn't found their way up. She had to go back to find her children before sh ewould be allowed up. So this ghost woman spends eternity roaming looking for her children.

[ Edited by: suicide_sam on 2004-12-24 12:03 ]

A friend of mine was trained by a Kahuna. The Kahuna used to work for the FBI helping them solve murders. She stopped after awhile though cause most of them were mafia murders and after awhile her life was in danger. My friend who was trained by this Kahuna used to live in New York were she made a living crossing over spirits that couldn't get over on their own. She explained to me that When someone dies there is a big door that opens for them to cross. If that person doesn't cross because they feel they have something they have to do first, the door starts to get smaller. Eventually it becomes to small for them to get across and they need help.

According to what this girl told me there are people that do this in every religion though and in every culture, most cultures and religions just don't really know about the people who do this for them. My friend is a Catholic, she was trained by a Kahuna from the time she was a child, and learned from an native American Shaman afterwards. When she first told me about it I thought she was totally crazy. She said, "I work for God. I'm a slayer, I fight vampires and the infection. It's not like Buffy, but thats a fun show.". She told me about allot of wild stuff that made me think she was just mental including that she gets yelled at allot by God and by the angels who give her orders because she gets emotionally involved with assignments but is suppossed to stay neutral. I thought she was crazy as hell when she told me about all this. I told my mom about it cause my mom is all into all that weird religous stuff. To my suprise my mom was not shocked by any of it. My mom said, "You know your aunt Lupe? She does that too." then my mom started telling me stories of things my aunt, a christain, of things she has done.

Apperantly all the bad in humanity comes from an infection that is snake based, and apparently every culture and every religion has people whose job it is to fight that infection.

I have seen ghosts myself, the house I grew up in was haunted and my whole family used to see it regularly, but allot of the stuff I heard with all this was way out of my league so I just left it alone and didn't try to understand most of it. Maybe their all crazy, maybe not.

The Kahuna who blessed our house alluded to the "crossing over" thing too. He mentioned the Night Marchers - In traditional Hawaiian folklore, the NM's are spirits of departed ancient Hawaiian warriors who died in battle. There are many areas in O'ahu that were once the sites of fierce battles. They Supposedly gather and march down familiar battle path. Legend has it that if you see them or are intheir path, you are to lie down and pretend to be dead. Do not look in their eyes or they will take your soul. This Kahuna told me that these warriors are trying to go "home". To them, home is where they used to live, but since they are dead they must travel to the "jumping-off" point between this world and the next (over here that's Ka'ena Point). From time to time, he goes to meet with NM's to help direct them to Kaena Point so that they may move on. Case in point: he told me of an older gentlemen who contacted him about NM's walking through his house. It seemed his house lay directly in the path they normally took. Every night at the same time, his doors would all open buy themselves and in would walk these warrior spirits - in the front and out the back. He wasn't scared but just tired of it. He couldn't get people to come visit because THEY were so scared after witnessing it. So the Kahuna went to his house and sure enough, just like expected, in they came. The Kahuna followed them out back and spoke to them and directed them to Ka'ena Point. Over time the number of NM's became less and less until eventually they stopped coming altogether...

Yeah ... more to the world than we know man. I have a friend from Australia who walked (and took ferries or freighters where appropriate), and literally walked from Sydney to Beirut (where I met him). In walking across India, he said there were a lot of "mystics" who wanted to tell his fortune usually for a few bucks. However, he got to one village in central India, and children came out to meet him and said there was a man who wanted to talk to him. He knew this ususally meant spending a bit of money, but he's well off, and was willing to do the meeting anyway. Oddly, unlike other villages or towns, the man he met with was not asking for money. The man told him that he was the only son with 9 sisters (correct), the man (who spoke no English) then proceeded to name his sisters. The man told him the reason he left Australia (which was a dark secret), and told him where he was going (also a fact that he had not disclosed to anyone). The man asked him if he wanted to tell him his future.

Well, what would you do? Andrew, gave a resolute NO as an answer, and asked only if he'd reach his destination. The answer was yes. Five years later I got a card from London saying that he'd finally reached the home of his great-grandparents in England, and was returning by air to Australia.

There's more to the world than we know. Modern science, in all it's arrogance, thinks that we know more than we really do. I don't want to say "magic" because I'm sure that the caveman (not understanding the nature of lightning) sat in awe and fear of those events he could not comprehend. Still, there is MUCH we don't understand, and more to the world than we know.

I am glad that there are still true Kahuna to pull us around our Western certainties and show us that we don't know everything!

Cheers!

TikiTony-

You're absolutely right - I am extremely fortunate to be able to live here in "the gathering place". I am originally from Dana Point/San Clemente, CA, and while very cool places- they don't compare to this place. Cybertiki said it very well: there's more to the world than we know. There is kini akua, a great many spirits here... no matter where you go, you feel them. It is both fascinating and, at times, unnerving.

Here's a story told to me by another Hawaiian friend of mine- it happened when he was about 20 years old:
One night, he and some friends grabbed some beer, jumped in a car and headed out one of the old roads in Mililani. There is an old cattle pen next to the road and this is where they stopped. My friend said he needed to relieve himself so he want over to a nearby tree. The other guys were laughing and making a lot of noise as they walked up the dirt road. My friend looked up to the top of the hill above where the other guys were headed and saw a sight that almost stopped his heart: coming up out of the ground were white shapes. This area is part of Kipapa Gulch which was the site of many ancient bloody battle;many people died there.

My friend stopped what he was doing and ran to his friends, telling them to shut up and that they had to leave immediately. They were still laughing and making a lot of noise, and when he kept after them about the need to leave, they finally stopped and asked what his problem was. "Look..." he said, pointing up the hill. What they saw were hundreds of white shapes coming down the road toward them. The guys turned and ran screaming back to the car. My friend just put his head down and walked slowly back to the car, saying "Im sorry, I'm sorry..." over and over. All the while he said he could see out of the corner of his eye that there was one of the spirits right behind him off his left side. At one point the spirit halted and my friend continued on until he got to the car, which he started and drove away slowly. He said he has never been back to that site since then...

On 2004-12-20 22:55, MaiTaiMafia wrote:
The Kahuna's stories were spooky at the time, but I think the scariest stories are from one of my friends- another native Hawaiian that was born/raised here. Picture the setting in which he told me this tale: Friday night, about 11:30pm, he and a couple of other friends and I sitting in his garage talking-story (this is a typical Friday night out here - some good barbecue, a few Heinekens and talk-story... all in the garage/driveway of the house). Someone brought up the subject of Night Marchers or something and my friend starts telling the story of an incident that happened just after he graduated high school:

He and some friends were in a pick-up truck along with some beers and they were looking to go hang out somewhere in the country, drink some beer and talk story - normal stuff. My friend was in the passenger side of the truck, the driver was the only other one in the cab and there were three big local boys in the back(you can ride in the back of a pick-up truck here). As they headed out this one dirt road the driver and my friend both saw up at the edge of the light from their headlights, a white shape moving in the brush on the right side of the road. As the driver slowed down the shape came out and crossed the road to the left side. The truck was now stopped. The guys in the back had no idea what was going on. My friend told the driver to turn around and get out of there- which he started doing, and at the same time, the person in the bushes came back out to the center of the road, turned to face them and started moving towards them. Both my friend and the driver knew what they were looking at, O'ahu's infamous "White Lady". They finally got the car turned around and started heading down the road and now the occupants in the back could finally see why they had changed course so abruptly. They started pounding on the top of the truck and screaming like little girls "Hurry up! Hurry up! She's right behind us!!!". My friend, too scared to turn around (and also unable to see due to the fact that there was about 700lbs of big tough Hawaiian guys plastered against the back window of the truck, ventured a look out the passenger side mirror to see the horrifying image of the wraith rapidly closing on their vehicle. He said he didn't know how long she chased them but at some point she must have stopped because the guys in the back finally stopped screaming.

After hearing this story (and a few others) I had to drive myself home at about 1:30am in my Jeep that had the side curtains off - about 40 miles, through the haunted pineapple fields and along the lonely and very dark highway that runs along the North Shore to my then-home in Kahuku. I had chicken-skin the entire trip. What a freak-out!!! Their are white lady stories from almost everywhere in the world and most of them are great urban legends. But one look at my friend's face and the sound in his voice while he told this story and I am certain he actually experienced this. He's a very honest guy, father of two and doesn't need to make this stuff up. Other friends that were there in the garage had experienced some of these things with him as well...

---

[ Edited by: MaiTaiMafia on 2004-12-20 22:56 ]

[ Edited by: MaiTaiMafia on 2004-12-20 23:00 ]

Something li dis happen to my cousin on Kauai. I moved up here in Seattle Washington wit my mom guys cuz is too expensive on kauai and is hard for find one job ya. Den my cousin guys came move up here too so they can have a better life cuz all they did was get in trouble on the islands and dat is not one life. But anyways when they moved up he told me plenty stories of things that happened and things he heard. And one of his stories is similar to this story you just told.

So what had happen was he was wit his friend guys cruisin, drivin around in their truck. He was sittin in the back by himself ya. They was drivin down this road and the truck had die out. My cousin and his friends had try fix em but never start so they figure they can push em a Lil to get em started. Sooner or later it started and they continued to do what they was going do. The next day my cousin went hang out wit his friends again and he was tellin them that the other day when he was sittin in the back had the white figure lady on the side of the road and when they got close that's when the car had die out. He knew of the white figure lady. He said you not suppose to fear her. She just wanted one ride. And while my cousin and his friends were hoppin out the car to go push, dat is when the white figure had sit in the back of the truck and had start. The whole time my cousin sat in the back wit her, no fear. When she got to her destination down the road they was going she simply vanished. His friends said they seen the same ting but they neva li say nothin cuz they neva li scare each other but had trip em out.

I had previously posted my Kahuna story on the Pele/Volcano/Fire Art Swap thread. But now that this thread has resurfaced it looks like a good place for the story too.

Years ago, while hiking near Na'alehu on the southern slopes Mauna Loa, I ran across an old run-down hut in a clearing. I could see smoke from the cook fire so I shouted "Aloha" and out came a very ancient looking man. We talked for a while, he told me he had been a kahuna at the ‘Iolani Palace before the invasion of the haoles. That he had moved to this remote area to find some peace. Then he lowered his voice and looked around - "There's something I want to show you" he said and motioned me into his hut.

Once inside the dark and smoky hut he handed me something round and hard. As my eyes adjusted, I could see that it was a human skull! He whispered "This is the actual skull of the volcano goddess Pele". I examined the object in my hands, it was smooth black snowflake obsidian with traces of lava flowing down the sides. From the fissures and the hollow eye sockets emanated an orange glow and it was warm to the touch. “It won’t be long now until I go to live with the ancestors” the aged one told me “I can sell it to you for $100”

How could I pass up a chance to own the real skull of Pele!? He even had a certificate of authenticity from the Territory of Hawaii Bureau of Antiquities dated 1932. So I paid him, packed the skull carefully in my backpack and brought it home where I displayed it proudly on my mantle.

Last year, I was back in Hawai’i and found the dilapidated grass shack again. There was still smoke coming from the hut so I called out and the wizened old man came forth. He hadn’t changed a bit, still looking not a day younger than 150. I could tell he didn’t remember me as he told me his story and invited me into his hut again. He handed me another skull and said “This is the actual skull of the volcano goddess Pele”. “Wait a minute” I said “When I was here several years ago you sold me the ‘actual skull of the goddess Pele’ for a hundred bucks and it was much larger than this one”. “Yes” the kahuna said “I know, this is the skull of Pele when she was just a little girl”. :lol:

My family recently spent three weeks in Kauai. I flew over to Oahu for a day to visit a friend who makes museum quality replica Hawaiian war weapons (pahoa, kepa lima, leiomano, strangulation cord etc), anyways he volunteers at the Bishops Museum, and pulled a favour and got me into the private collections area ... bags of kepa lima (lethal, hidden finger weapons), shark tooth leiomano, etc. from the days of Kamehameha, got to hold a couple of them, using white gloves, powerful experience, got da chicken skin ... even a three foot marlin dagger from Cpt James Cook from his first expedition to Hawaii ... really cool. The curator of collections as well as one of their scholars were present, and they were also talking of the Night Marchers, they themselves having seen them. I don't really believe in ghost, but makes you wonder ... these were highly educated folks ... they are so proud of their culture and heritage. Check out the Bishops if you're there, amazing to see the giant Ku on display, and lots of other tikis!

I was on Oahu two years ago and visited the Bishop Museum. Not only is the collection amazing, but the interior of the museum is also very beautiful. We took a LOT of photos both in the museum and on the grounds. I will also highly recommend the Bishop Museum to anyone who is on Oahu and interested in Polynesian culture and history. On my trip we did a combination of both "touristy" things as well as visiting cultural and historical sites. It was surprising to see how few tourists were exposed to "real" Hawai`i.

Your behind-the-scenes tour of the private collection sounds awesome. I think my hair would have stood on end too.