Post #224171 by Hau 'oli Tiki on Fri, Mar 31, 2006 9:23 AM

Absolutely FABULOUS!!!! I LOVE it!!! Printed out beautifully w/ my photo workshop thingy!

I love the dude on crutches! And Davo w/ his coconut! I was laughing so hard when I first opened it, I choked on my coffee! Drug and porn spam...!!!

NOW...sign the girls up! I am applying for a special scholarship through the Mr's work. I think the The Fanny Funke Trust Fellowship will be perfect!

Mrs Fanny Funke (pronounced Fewn-kay) was a missionary, who, in 1931 , at the age of 20, was sent to the Atolls surrounding the Pacific Island chain. She was sent to bring the word of God to the island savages. Before she ever reached her destination, a wicked storm blew her ship off course. Many aboard perished. She and what was left of her crew barely made it alive to a small atoll. They were greeted by what she could only surmise to be some sort of Polynesian tribal types. To her relief, they were very kind and showed her the true spirit of Aloha. She fell in love with the Chief of the tribe. He hand carved a majestic tiki for her wedding day gift. Fanny lived many happy years there, becoming one of them so thoroughly, she almost forgot English! After many years, the natives were visited by a large expedition party. Sadly, this was no adventure seeking mission. It was the United States military engaged in a recon mission to find suitable atolls to test their new nuclear weapons upon. Needless to say, Fanny, her beloved husband and the whole tribe were told to leave. Having no choice, they allowed themselves to be packed up and shipped off. She was forced to leave her Wedding tiki behind due to a lack of space. She stashed it in the bottom of a deep cave, hoping one day to come back and inhabit her beloved atoll again. They were given modern housing upon the main island of Hawai'i. The tribe never fully acclimated to the new life style. On December 7th, 1941, Pearl Harbor was bombed. Fanny lost her beloved husband and all but 3 tribal relatives. She vowed she would get even with the people that ruined her life. She spent the rest of her life in an underground effort to expose the secret tests the government had performed on her beloved atoll. She made many friends, and enemies. The friends helped her with wise financial advice. Being a forward thinker, she set up a trust for the financing of further studies and advancement in both scholarly and scientific fields of the Polynesian Culture. These scholarships have a "bond" requirement, recipients may be required for a specified time to work for particular employer (The Fanny Funke Foundation), to work in rural or remote areas, otherwise they may be liable to repay the cash value of the support they received during the scholarship. Fanny made sure to put a stipulation in that each student do their work experience on one of the many remote atolls, islands, or reefs. Fanny was mysteriously killed during a protest of a nuclear test on February 11, 1987 at the Nevada Proving Grounds. Official reports state she was robbed and shot by an unknown assailant. Friends and those close to her say they were never allowed to see her body, as the government officials claim she died on private military property. During her funeral, a friend attending claims his dosimeter (a wearable Geiger counter) registered extreme levels of radiation. He came back to the grave hours after all had left. The radiation was coming from Fanny's grave! An explanation has never been offered.
Fanny's head stone is actually the hand carved Wedding Tiki. It was lovingly retrieved from the old atoll caves by old friends. The inscription below it says: Fanny Funke, Proud Chieftess of the People of Fangatoro Atoll. The fire that burns with in a heart can never be extinguished. 12-11-1911 to 2-11-1987.

I guess now we have to set up a "web site" for the Fanny Funke Foundation. More work for you Hewey!! Feel free to correct, ad to or cut and paste the "history" of Fanny! Dang! This is fun!

My neighbor is out there right now. I think I'll casually drop the TIKI brochure as I'm leaving. I update you all! Perhaps at the Tiki Taix, tonight!!