Post #242628 by Sabu The Coconut Boy on Wed, Jul 12, 2006 11:46 PM

I was watching "Teenage Sex Kittens" from 1972 earlier today. You may have heard of it. It stars some pretty famous actors who were synonomous with the best of American Cinema of the 1970s; most notably, Lilly Lovetree, Threda Bara, Doug Farbank and Long Hangey. The reason I was watching this movie is that I was looking for a small sample of pretty 1970s instrumental music that I could attach to an E-Card to my dear old grandmother for her birthday at the nursing home. I wasn't really watching what was going on, because the movie is somewhat pornographic and frankly I'm not interested in that, being a guy and all.

Anyway, our four heroes are driving to Palm Springs so that the enterprising young ladies can set up some kind of business venture in one of the hotels to make a little money. This is all highly laudable. So they're driving down the main drag and the camera pans on each hotel they drive by. Suddenly, I see this sign, (oh by the way, the movie has German subtitles, which is useful in understanding some of the sex scenes):

Well needless to say, I was so suprised at what I was seeing that I leapt to my feet and promptly tripped on my pants which were around my ankles. (ha ha! Just kidding. My pants weren't really around my ankles. That would be silly. Actually I wasn't wearing pants at all).

As the camera continued its pan, we can see the Sambos restaurant attached to the Tropics Motel, which sadly, was torn down years ago, and replaced with a Mexican restaurant, much like my morals:

Next, we see that classic entrance to the Tropics motor court, home to many wonderful times at Tiki Oasis. Strangely, the same camper is still parked there today:

Well, needless to say, after that nice bit of foreplay, I was so strung-out that I could barely light my cigarette. Unfortunately there was no release though. Our heroines chose a completely different hotel in which to set up their "business", a place called "Harlow's Hideaway" or something like that. So they completely missed the chance to have the orgy scene take place in room 135 of the Tropics, with Al bartending and King Kukulele playing Hawaiian Cowboy, which we all know from experience makes any orgy a really special event. Oh well. I guess you can't have your porn and tiki too.

So in conclusion, I highly recommend "Teenage Sex Kittens". I give it four, fully-erect tikis plus one semi-flacid tiki. Top-knotch entertainment!

Saboom-boom chicka-bau-bau, The Coconut Boy.