need a change of career warning venting

I'm finishing up some Superbowl work and the next job, has been delayed for awhile. Thats the one thing about working freelance, sometimes the down time comes unexpected. When I had allot of down time before the next big job I used to go to Imperial beach and park on the street and have lunch there, looking at the waves rolling in. Sometimes I would take my dog and throw a ball around for her in the sand. I'm getting sick of computers. I think I should have been a ship builder. Spending half my life in the ocean. You know I haven't been to the beach since last year's Tiki Beach Fest? And that time I didn't even get in the water. I used to love the beach. When I was a kid I would get in the water and start swimming out until I couldn't see the land anymore. All I could see was ocean all around me. Now I sit in front of a computer all day wishing I cared about what I was doing. I gotta call around tomorrow and line up my next gig. Maybe if I hadn't bought a house and a new car and if I still didn't have student loan payments I could have just moved to the a beach in Hawaii. Worked nights as a bouncer at a bar, and painted beautiful hawaiian girls all day long. I see college kids so desperate to get into the line of work I'm fed up with. Hard work never bothered me, my dad's a landscaper, I was going to work with him since I was a little kid. I can do concrete work, tree service, all that stuff. Once I did a job with my dad where I had to tie a rope around myself and hang off the side of an extremely steep hill, I guess you would call it a cliff, digging holes in the side of it to put these tubes in so that they could cover the whole side of the cliff with cement. This was to prevent landslides during the rainy season and the tubes were so water retained behind the concrete could still filter out. That was hard work. I never even saw the last two movies I worked on, probably won't see the last one either. Wesley Snipes killing vampires, yeah, that's a winner. I love returning to LA after going somewhere cause when I arrive at LAX I can always smell the ocean breeze a little. The ocean breeze lets me know I'm home. Well If I end up with allot of down time I guess that means I get to hang out with my dog more for awhile. Maybe I'll atke her to the beach.

Sorry folks just venting a little. Think I'll go home and do some drinking tonight. Might even light up some of the mean greens, do some drawrings.

You know I haven't been to the beach since last year's Tiki Beach Fest? And that time I didn't even get in the water. I used to love the beach. When I was a kid I would get in the water and start swimming out until I couldn't see the land anymore. All I could see was ocean all around me.

I understand your dilemma but keep in mind that at least you have that ocean there nearby instead of being several hundred miles away. Good luck in your job future.
Now I must go watch the corn grow. No ocean for the midwestern tikiphiles.:(

When I return to LA, I see the beautiful orange sunsets, feel my throat constrict, and say to myself, smog, it looks and smells like home!

Scheduling relaxing time with your dog is good for both of you. Maybe more trips to the beach will give you insight to a new career?

And a note for those of you landlocked types: most people who grew up near the beaches of California have no idea what just picked sweet corn tastes like, and have never been in a cornfield maze, so they're missing out, too.

I could use some help landscaping. Sell your house and come on up here. They are cheaper up here and you get a lot for your money. I could give you concrete side jobs, too.

Hey Fred, Nassco, one of the shipbuilding companies in San Diego, is hiring big time right now. Maybe Shipwreck Joey can hook you up.

I also heard that the LB docks were hiring union dock workers & crane operators right now.

Don't sell your house. You'll never afford to buy back into California. Just put a tenant in it and take some time for yourself. 6 months to a year in Hawaii would be great. I'm sure Gecko could hook you up somewhere to work.

That will change your attitude and then you can get back to life :wink:

Good luck!
:drink:

I'm gettin the itch to do something different or at least go somewhere diffferent too... but as was mentioned, I could never afford to buy back into Toronto. Gotta keep paying that mortgage! Could always rent out the place though, but I'd have to find some rich Japanese businessman straight from Tokyo, otherwise people would say... you need HOW MUCH for that one bedroom?

On 2004-08-19 19:28, Moki wrote:
Don't sell your house. You'll never afford to buy back into California. Just put a tenant in it and take some time for yourself. 6 months to a year in Hawaii would be great. I'm sure Gecko could hook you up somewhere to work.

That will change your attitude and then you can get back to life :wink:

Good luck!
:drink:

Contrare, I can now move almost anywhere in the world. This is our second home and when we are ready we will make the decision. We haven't been here a year yet but we've built considerable equity in a short period. In 5 or 10 years we could buy some nice digs in Hawaii if we choose.

Well, after 11 years in accounting and finance, I'm calling it quits, returning to school, and embarking on a more pleasurable career.

I am fortunate in that Mdm Bong does well, and the only debt we have is a small house payment and 1 car payment.

It's a bit scary at first, taking the plunge and all. Like Sam said, I'm tossing a job that any accounting/finance grad would kill for. But it sucked.

I honestly believe that the more I got into Hawaiian culture - language, steel guitar, history, etc - the more it helped me realize that one needs to make the most out of the time we spend on the surface of this Earth. What matters is family, friends, and taking time for yourself.

I guess it will be a drag surfing and playing steel everyday for hours on end (oh yeah, and studying!).

Fred,
Do you what you feel is right for you. Prior to what I do now, I was an Architectural Consultant for 13 years. I love it but as the industry changed, I got burned out and needed a change so I quit and went back to school full time (for a 2nd degree) so I could switch careers.

Bong's right -- life is too short to spend most of your days doing something you don't enjoy. Take a leap of faith -- you'll probably thank yourself in the longrun.

I hate my job too. I am in business management. I have been a facility manager for a storage company for 2 years and before that I was in management at Domino's Pizza for 10yrs. I would like to do something I enjoy for a living, but I have yet to find someone that will pay me for laying around Ft Lauderdale beach doing bong hits, and drinking mucho cervezas. To be honest, I live about 15 miles west of the beach, and I maybe go 2-3 times a year. But seriously, life is too short to live your life hating what you do. I am in the process of trying to find a new job in Northern Florida along with a place for the wahine and I to live. The cost of living here in South Florida has almost caught up with you guys in California. Everyone wants to live here, and property values are increasing by 30% each year.

After umpteen years of working in a pressure cooker & holding out for stock options to come due, one glorious day I finally turned in my resignation letter and never looked back.

I planned my escape by riding a bike to work for a year so I could buy a used car for cash instead of making payments. Six years of vacations in tents instead of hotels, etc.

This week I started a new job in a field I should have been in from the start. I'd rather pinch pennies than do work that doesn't make me happy.

Wow, I'm impressed by anyone with the balls to chuck the steady paycheck in favor of going back to school. But I'm terrified of getting back into more debt to pay for school to learn a new career. I know it should pay off in the end, but there's always that "what if" in the back of my mind.

I've been looking into other thiings I'd rather be doing as (like S. Sam) I'm increasingly feeling empty about my work too. I want to find something that has more meaning for me. And maybe even help people in the process.

I gotta start doing some research. That's about as much as I've figured out right now.

And congratulations to Bong and kctiki for just going for it.

Reading this all I can relate so much, wish I could do a capsule of where I am at right now, my dream job awaits, Bar manager of a tiki bar, and I still am hoping it can happen so I can move my family to Cali and be close to a real beach, which I have not seen since leaving Hawaii in 93. But right now I would even be stoked to take the landscaping job with Jungle Trader if it meant I could move to Cali.

On 2004-08-20 19:10, Tiki-Toa wrote:
Reading this all I can relate so much, wish I could do a capsule of where I am at right now, my dream job awaits, Bar manager of a tiki bar, and I still am hoping it can happen so I can move my family to Cali and be close to a real beach, which I have not seen since leaving Hawaii in 93. But right now I would even be stoked to take the landscaping job with Jungle Trader if it meant I could move to Cali.

T-Toa,

Me tinks you should go for it. Otherwise, there'll always be the 'what if' that you won't be able to answer.

Think about it this way, if you did move to Cali, and if your plans did fail, could you return to where you are now? If so, do it.

And if you make your plans work, you're where you want to be.

I remember a lyric from a song I can't quite recall that was "home isn't where you are, but where you belong...

On 2004-08-20 22:30, Tiki_Bong wrote:

Me tinks you should go for it. Otherwise, there'll always be the 'what if' that you won't be able to answer.

Think about it this way, if you did move to Cali, and if your plans did fail, could you return to where you are now? If so, do it.

And if you make your plans work, you're where you want to be.

I remember a lyric from a song I can't quite recall that was "home isn't where you are, but where you belong...

Yes I could return home, can always do that. But the thought of having to come back to shitty weather 90% of the time is depressing. And the hardest thing is the waiting, waiting to hear whether you will be given a chance to just be able to work your ass off and prove yourself to someone.

Chongo thinks Suicide_Sam should just take a bunch of drugs like everyone else in the movie racket and cease the whining. Chongo is one of those few people in this country who know what REAL work is -- and I do not get the impression that Sam is eager to learn the same.

[ Edited by: Chongo on 2004-08-21 17:50 ]

After working for a huge corporation for 20 years, and working my way up in management, after yaers of missing my kids stuff at school or being out of town when they needed me, after bleeding the color of this company, hell I spent 1 night guarding a fence during the LA riots and lived on site for 3 months after the 94 earthquake...they walked in one day and fired me. Yeah I made some mistakes, minor ones really but they needed some blood so out I went. I thought the world ended...but it did'nt, I could not be happier or more fulfilled running my own construction/development company making tons more than I did, I never miss anything my kids or wife does, yeah its still hard work but its MY WORK! (that you gave me Lord! Thank you)

On 2004-08-21 17:49, Chongo wrote:
Chongo thinks Suicide_Sam should just take a bunch of drugs like everyone else in the movie racket and cease the whining. Chongo is one of those few people in this country who know what REAL work is -- and I do not get the impression that Sam is eager to learn the same.

[ Edited by: Chongo on 2004-08-21 17:50 ]

Toa thinks Chongo should burn out and fade away. My apolgize to Neil Young for bastardizing his lyrics but I figure it fits a posting bastard like Chongo.

On 2004-08-21 17:49, Chongo wrote:
Chongo is one of those few people in this country who know what REAL work is

Now now, Chongo I apologize for venting in public, I know PPs (pesronal problems) shouldn't be aired out. But you need to to watch that tongue of yours. This scene aint that big, just cause we're not in the same corner of the map right now deosn't mean that we will never run into each other at some big Tiki event like Oasis or something. No sense starting up beefs now that will have to get handled later.

Oh and believe it or not there are lots of people who know what real work is, not just you. I don't even know what you do buit I'll give the benfit of the doubt that it's something hard. But guess what, there are more peopel that do hard maunal labor in this world than there are people who can make a living paper pushing.

And just to let you know, I would beat your ass in a minute if you ever get smart with me in person.

Ultimately, the real point is that people are needing more and more to find what truly makes them happy in life regardless of what type of work that is. Yes, we all have bills to pay and plenty other financial responsibilties to tend to, but it's a sad thing when we reach the end of our lives and wonder why we worked so hard for something that didn't really have any meaning for us. Some people are happier pushing buttons and others would rather be doing something physical than sit still all day. Our society needs all kinds, but it usually does not benefit the individual (or those around them) if that person is increasingly unhappy with their daily work. If Mr. Chongo's occupation makes him that ornery, then maybe he needs a new career too.

Sam, I dont see any need for you to apologize to chongo or anyone else. Your tiki family supports you.
Aloha!

Sam I loved what you said to Chongo, just perfect. However, word of advice, Never feel sorry about things you did not do, but feel sorry for things that you did do.

Whoa, hold the phone! Who is this Chongo guy to make judgements on Sam, someone he doesn't have a clue about? The ad said he was venting, take it for what it is Chongo! Chongo, since you are so good at passing judgements on people you don't know, I think I will do the same...I think your an insensitive asshole. Did I hit the nail on the head or what!?

let's not feed the troll. hes got 5 mean posts. i don't see him stopping anytime soon.

On 2004-08-22 01:00, Atomicchick wrote:
Whoa, hold the phone! Who is this Chongo guy to make judgements on Sam, someone he doesn't have a clue about? The ad said he was venting, take it for what it is Chongo! Chongo, since you are so good at passing judgements on people you don't know, I think I will do the same...I think your an insensitive asshole. Did I hit the nail on the head or what!?

I apologize for criticisms that appeared to offend people rather than being received constructively. I think the problem is that you did not know Chongo before you read these comments. I guarantee that if you get to know Chongo, you will find Chongo quite charming, and his constructive criticism will be appreciated.

Recognizing this, Chongo will be less harsh in his constructive criticism before he has met you.

Hey Chongo, why do you refer to yourself in the 3rd person? You seem to think you are better than everyone else on TC acting like an aloof snob. If being a jerk, trying to put others down and correcting them because they misspell a word makes you feel better, you are truly a miserable person inside and probably don't even know it. Maybe correcting others and using big words makes you feel like a big man because you are attempting to compensating for your small tool. You say, "Recognize this, Chongo will be less harsh in his constructive criticism before he has met you." Does that mean you will be more of a prick after we meet?

LARS ??? (de ja vu)

On 2004-08-20 13:28, Tiki_Bong wrote:
I honestly believe that the more I got into Hawaiian culture - language, steel guitar, history, etc - the more it helped me realize that one needs to make the most out of the time we spend on the surface of this Earth. What matters is family, friends, and taking time for yourself.

This is so true, Bong!

I had a friend who was diagnosed with brain cancer at age 54. In Dec. of 1997 he noticed slurring in his speech that he couldn't control, so he scheduled an appointment and a tumor showed up on the MRI. He wanted to wait until after Christmas for the biopsy...just to have one more family holiday without the 'taint' of knowing that the growth was malignant. After Christmas the biopsy confirmed the malignancy. As the tumor grew, it took away his speech...all he could do was babble...and also paralyzed him on one side. Hard way to go for a guy who made his living as a manufacturer's rep selling sporting goods equipment.

One night I took him to go see Titanic, just to get him out of the 'prison cell' at home. When we got to the theater, rather than sit in the 'handicapped section', he insisted on walking up several steps to a row of seats in the back despite the difficulty. He was a rock...determined that if the cancer was gonna kill him, it would have to take him fighting!

Halfway through the movie, he had a siezure. I tried to revive him with CPR, but he was already gone before the medics arrived. Four months from biopsy to being put in the dirt. He left a wife, and a nine year old son who was and is a very promising athlete...a 'natural' in every sport he's in.

That experience woke me up, and I resolved to return to school to finish my bachelor's degree, which I did despite working a grave yard shift six days a week. After graduating from UC Irvine in 2000, the goal of finding more fulfilling employment has been elusive. I live with more anxiety than ever before,and I am not sure where this journey will lead, but I am resolved to not let death take me without a fight!!!

To all the TCers out there contemplating these major decisions, all I can tell you is life is gonna be a struggle at times no matter what you do, so you might as well follow your heart, and live a little before the big dirt nap! Thanks to you all, and esp. to Suicide Sam who has allowed us all to reflect a little on why we are here.

P.S. (To Chongo) Dude, nobody NEEDS criticism, constructive or otherwise...if they WANT it, they will ask for it, but usually from a close friend. Encouragement is always welcome. I wish you the best in your efforts to find peace in your life!

I know Chongolio pretty well and I've met S. Sam. I like them both.

Chongolio calls Sam a whiner.

So far Chongolio has been called a prick, an asshole, a bastard. Now Sam wants to beat his ass. Back off people.

Some of you have forgotten Aloha!

JT...there is a Chongo amongst us...not Chongolio...CHONGO. Check his posts and make your own opinion, as for me, I find no use for his kind on TC (meaning Chongo...not Chongolio)

Course it could be that Chongolio is just pulling a fast one on all of us!

OHHHHH! Chongo is in the Great Northwest and our beloved Chongolio is in Calif.

My bad.

The name calling is not worthy of TC.

Aloha!!

JT!
You crack me up dude.
You remind me of Saturday Night Live's Emily Litella.
"Oh that's entirely different. NEVER MIND"

Thank you Unga...awhile back I had posted to the thread acknowledging the passing of the creator of Pop Rocks.

http://www.tikicentral.com/viewtopic.php?topic=10279&forum=6&vpost=106595

In it, I had mistakenly confused Guilda's character Roseanne Roseanna Danna with this priceless character, Emily Litella.

So, to all on TC, I stand corrected!

Never mind.

s_sam:

Sorry to hear that you're burned out. I feel the same way. After my last company went belly-up, I resolved to to find a new line of work that was more challenging and creative. I know there's interesting people out there doing interesting things- I just haven't worked with them yet! So the quest continues. My only highly unsolicited advice is this: I know you're burned, but you are (at least from my perspective) very fortunate to make a living in a creative field. People like me stuck in the "uncreative arts" (transportation logistics! feel the excitement!) would love to have an opportunity to do something more interesting. I just want to warn you that should you get into banking or something, you may find that you really miss being creative.

Hey Sam!

I too feel for you. I formerly made my living in a line of work that everyone would think was wonderful, a dream, creative, glamorous, blah blah. Yes, I was a (not-teenage) rock (not-very-big-at-all) star. I won't go into any whining, but suffice it to say I was eventually hating my life on the road and wanted out.

Best thing I ever did.

Now, I was lucky. 1.) I didn't have a mortgage, dependents, or any debt and 2.) I had a side gig (grading essays for the Georgia state writing test) that I could slide into and make a fulltime job, so it's not like I took a huge leap (like you Bong) or took on enormous debt with further education. But I lost that fulltime job (state cutbacks in education) and went back to substitute teaching fulltime. And then it hit me; I was meant to teach.

Terrified, I accepted a real teaching position that opened up mid-year. But it was so obviously meant to be (again, I was lucky that it was so clear). After that semester, THEN I took the big plunge of getting more education. I'd been warned; it would be hell for those two years of working fulltime while attending school fulltime (nights), and it was. But it meant a payraise - yay!

And now I LOVE what I do, and I get paid (with consistent paychecks) to do it. And I can take it with me anywhere (everybody needs high school Spanish teachers), especially thanks to getting the masters (even though you and I and everyone knows that Ed Masters are stupid degrees!).

Moral: Do whatcha gotta do! If you hate your job (or hate what it keeps you from), life is too short to stay there. Sometimes really short. I don't think anyone on his deathbed reflects on his past and regrets having done what he loved and taking big risks to do it, even if sometimes they failed. (I'll say the only exception is if a HUGE, stupid risk failed to the point of putting their wife and kids out on the street. But does anyone blow it that big? Nope. So relax!)

Good luck with your mental inventory, Hon!

On 2004-08-22 18:22, Formikahini wrote:
(I'll say the only exception is if a HUGE, stupid risk failed to the point of putting their wife and kids out on the street. But does anyone blow it that big?

You've never met my dad. (But that's a whole other story.) I want to stay positive here, but just letting you know that there are such people. While we still managed to keep a roof over our heads (albeit some very leaky ones), there were some VERY close calls. And it's really no fun growing up in constant fear of becoming homeless. Thank goodness that no one here on TC sounds nearly as irresponsible.

(Oh, and if you're curious for an example, how about putting a chinchilla farm before your house payments. That's right, I said chinchilla farm. No joke!)

BTW, Formica I did like your success story too. Especially that you went from being a "rock star" to being a teacher. (Usually, the cliche is the other way around.) But I admire anyone that seeks to spend their daily lives in improving the next generation. I count myself as very fortunate that I had some fantastic teachers in my education that ended up making a huge difference in my life.

Formikahini
Sounds to me like your still a Star!

Thanks Tiki Rider :)

Vintage Girl, I was having these visions of "Slums of Beverly Hills" when I was writing that, and yes, I should have said, "But how often does that happen?" instead. 'Cuz, yep, it does happen. I'm glad to hear you made it out of that childhood nightmare with your wonderfulness intact. (I can't picture you with the bra on underneath the halter top, though, the way the central character wears hers at the film's beginning. A major fashion faux-pas is hard to picture on you!)

So the trick is, Sam - Stay Awake From The Chinchilla Farms!! Don't bet the farm (or in that case, ON the farm). Seriously, you'll do fine as long as you're not putting the health and safety of others at risk (and I think you're a solo guy, no? Or are there little Sam's running about?). You have skills on which you can always fall back, too, even if a venture out of your safety zone doesn't prove wildly successful.

And hey, if there are dependents in your life, consider that there are those of us out there who'd gladly trade places with those of you with families. Grass is always greener, right?

[ Edited by: Formikahini on 2004-08-23 16:04 ]

CHONGO does not = Chongolio!

Hey Sam, You gotta know that is not me talkin' jive. Good luck with career choices/changes.Do what you love and the rest is suppose to work out.

Jungle Trader, You crazy mutha. I'll see you at the bike racks after school.

On 2004-08-23 08:23, Formikahini wrote:
Grass is always greener, right?

My point exactly. No matter what our individual circumstances are, no one else is in our shoes but us. And different things make different people happy. Another person might see one person's job as a dream, but only they know what it's like for their own perception each day. In other words, don't judge another until you've walked a mile in their shoes, as the old adage goes.

And Formika, thankfully it was my mom that mostly raised me so I don't think she would've let me out of the hosue with my bra strap in such a fashion (yes, I've seen the movie too, hilarious in a somewhat painful way.) Instead I would wear a too-small-for-me 60s miniskirt (from the Goodwill) with a leotard and knee-high socks to school in 1979. (No I wasn't a punk rocker (too young) and yes, my mom did warn me on that ensemble choice.)

Chongolio, I thought everybody was all over your ass.
That Chongo cat....dude, come down here and I'll sock you right in the chops.

Wao Nahele Kalepa Kumula'au Hale

[ Edited by: Jungle Trader on 2004-08-23 17:56 ]

Suicide_Sam, I think I know exactly how you feel. I could have written your post, just different coasts. Wish I had the answers.

I think for many people, including me, hoping for a career that will provide meaning to life just sets you up for disappointment. Even though I'm pretty happy with my work and it's even meaningful sometimes, I think the other parts of life outside the job are really what it's all about. But that's why it's even more important to maintain a balance and not do work that eats into your personal life. With a balance, work is just work.

For those who are fortunate enough to get fulfillment both in and out of work, it's a true blessing. But one of two ain't bad!

-Randy

Hey Suicide_Sam
There is an old saying that "young men think about women they have made love with, and old men think about the one's they didn't".

I belive when considering life changing choices, it's best to think not only of how it may end up in 20 years...but if you will go to your grave unhappy wondering "what if"

I have found myself feeling similar to what I think you are feeling at several times in my megre life. I think if one never did, they would be a fool.

What I found as a usefull tool for me is a visit to a very strange place alone. Especially a 3rd world country.

The lack of things familiar, makes familiar things somehow clearer....and in time my roll in them, or not in them becomes more defined to me.

Best of all, you can be wrong a bunch of times, and you learn as you go.

Hope that helps.

[ Edited by: Gigantalope on 2004-08-24 00:32 ]

Or you could head out to the wilderness for 3 or 4 days and listen to your thoughts, without all the distractions. Go backpacking, camp out, fish. Listen to the wind as it blows through the trees, and the ambling stream as it gently tumbles past cobblestone and moss rocks. Go out and listen to Mother Nature.

No, I'm not a tree hugger. But make sure you wear mosquito repellant, West Nile virus is here in Cali.

On 2004-08-23 18:35, aquarj wrote:
I think for many people, including me, hoping for a career that will provide meaning to life just sets you up for disappointment. Even though I'm pretty happy with my work and it's even meaningful sometimes, I think the other parts of life outside the job are really what it's all about. But that's why it's even more important to maintain a balance and not do work that eats into your personal life. With a balance, work is just work.

For those who are fortunate enough to get fulfillment both in and out of work, it's a true blessing. But one of two ain't bad!

-Randy

Well said and true Randy.

Finding fullfilment in a 'JOB' is not guaranteed. Look for your 'passion' in life, doesn't matter where you find it...at work, or in your personal life...just don't settle for mediocrity! Be great at something! People with passion are like magnets...they just attract positive elements. People without passion are also like magnets...they attract the negative elements.