How many things can you find wrong with this TIKI BAR ?

It seems I'm going to a "tiki bar" tonight that my wife's friends are all excited about. They had me check out the link...

I see at least 5 major things that are incorrect, can you name them?

http://www.tinfishresort.com/tikibar.htm

-Z

for extra credit, find the "tiki" drink...

http://www.tinfishresort.com/drink_menu.htm

No thatch
No bamboo
Not dark
Steel drum music
No Tikis!

how'd I do?

1. No tikis
2. Neon lighting
3. Chocolate Kiss Martini
4. "Are you a sports fan?? Then come check out the Tigers, Pistons, and Red Wings on one of our five brand new flat screens."
5. Plastic beer cups
6. $10 Mojito
7. Besides no tikis, what do they think makes this a tiki bar? Not even thatch,bamboo or anything.

Hmmm even thou I do not want a choclate martini and most nights I would rather not have the TV on in the background looks ok to me. A not so good tiki bar is better than a red onion any day. Good company can make up for a lot of the down falls. I say go and make the best of it.

On 2007-05-26 10:40, Feelin' Zombified wrote:

for extra credit, find the "tiki" drink...

http://www.tinfishresort.com/drink_menu.htm

It's a trick question. There is no tiki drink.

Its raining in Wisconsin right now... more than likely it will rain by you tonight...

there's your out. :wink:

On 2007-05-26 10:40, Feelin' Zombified wrote:

for extra credit, find the "tiki" drink...

http://www.tinfishresort.com/drink_menu.htm

"Tin Fish Tiki Tini - Vodka, Southern Comfort, Amarito [sic], Pineapple and OJ with Grenadine"

Sounds gross.

Ahh... I was looking for it in the picture. Silly me.

Hey FZ!
Just don't think of it as a tiki bar, since obviously the only thing tiki about it is four letters that they put next to "Bar" on the sign.

Think of it instead as a pretty view of a harbor with a nice outside bar with drinks that you can't afford to buy.

No - wait.

Scratch that last part and get your wife's friends to buy all of your drinks. There actually are some yummy cocktails on the menu if you overlook their names....and get them free. :wink:

But avoid this one: "Tin Fish Tiki Tini - Vodka, Southern Comfort, Amarito, Pineapple and OJ with Grenadine." That's the vomit-maker.
(I'm hoping "Amarito" is a typo rather than Amaretto flavored something.)
F

Ok, wait -

I just read the food menu:
$2 per oyster.
$1 per buffalo wing
$7 for chips and salsa.

$7.00 FOR CHIPS AND SALSA!!!????
I've been appalled at seeing $2 for that combo (they're free on most menus in Texas), but $7.00?!?!

OK, like I said: your wife's friends are picking up the bill. 'Nuff said.
F

Ooops. Dup.

[ Edited by: PremEx 2007-05-26 13:22 ]

On 2007-05-26 12:30, Formikahini wrote:
Just don't think of it as a tiki bar...[snip]...

Think of it instead as a pretty view of a harbor with a nice outside bar with drinks that you can't afford to buy.

That's about the only way I can stomach the new "Trader Vic's Lounge" in Beverly Hills. By forcing myself to consider it only as a very nice hotel pool bar.

But at least Trader Vics Lounge serves good quality tropical tiki drinks. Even though they are also not affordable ($14 Mai Tai and up, up, up!) to many.

This place...looks like your standard lightly decorated hotel marina or wharf bar.

:)

On 2007-05-26 12:36, Formikahini wrote:

OK, like I said: your wife's friends are picking up the bill. 'Nuff said.
F

F

If only they were. Based on a long history of the bill being split "evenly" :roll: , tonight I'm asking for separate checks! Perhaps the chips & salsa were flown in this morning from a Texas border town?

But I do agree with your mug 1/2 full view of the situation, everything is better next to the water.

-Z

How many things can you find wrong with this TIKI BAR ?

They open at 12 noon?

any bar worth their salt opens at 6am

even with the word "tiki" omitted from the name, I'd stear clear of that place.

What tiki bar? That looks like an old bait shack I used to buy minnows on at the pier.

Tiki and sports television?

Sorry to hear you have to go!

Psycho Tiki D (I know I am and not enough)!

Oh, wait a minute; if you put a sign up that says "Tiki Bar" then I guess it is a tiki bar...

My bad, have fun!

PTD

I bet they play only Jimmy Buffet songs too...

I was just going to say that!!! The word IMITATION should be on that sign.

Ok FZ, waitin' for a full report!!

F

I didn't see anything in the pictures that would 'exclude' it from being a Tiki Bar. I didn't see anything that would include it either so I will have to wait for the full report.

I DID see, however, what looks like a margarita-slurpy machine in the picture and that scares me more than antying else on the menu. And even if it is nothing more than a shaved-ice machine it is still frightening in its implications to the bar.

"So come join us this tiki season."
Boy, do I feel silly... I thought it was a year 'round kind of thing!
Aloha,
:tiki:

You only want 5 listed?!?!?!!?!?!?

There are only 5 very clear problems here:

The letters:
T
I
K
I

and the space between those letters and the word "BAR".

Remove those problems and it's all good...

Hmmm!

According to the manager, tikis come to visit his bar. That must be why he calls it a tiki bar. His guests are frequently tikis.

"Hi, my name is Nick Salkovski and I'm the Promotions/Tiki Bar manager at the Tin Fish Resort. This will be my third year working here and we have much in store for our tiki guests this summer."

Here's an aerial view. Looks pretty cold—not a place I would expect tikis to hang out.

Let's see. In their picture gallery they have one of a tiki bar party.

Nope. Don't see any tikis there.

Oh, wait!

Sports on the flat screen TVs!

Maybe Tiki Bar is just short for Tiki Barber.

It's Fair Haven, MI. baby .....

Oh my. I need a drink.

ok, here is the report... (insert exasperated sigh smiley here) I'm really not in the mood for composing a narrative, so I'll just list some highlights.

-not one rum drink on the "specialty" drink menu

-wife ordered a Gibson, they tried to give her a Gimlet (with Roses Lime, no less)- $10

-far too many complaints about the food (and high prices) to go into detail.

-the interior of the place is as generic as reataurants come, nothing to report.

-the outdoor bar wasn't open yet, but I did walk around out there. In all fairness, there is a nice view and they have a huge fire-pit table, but that's it.

-I took a pic of the one and only "tiki"... it's the pole behind the dragon.

you can tell it's a tiki because it says so.

oh, and there was a 2nd dragon elsewhere on the grounds. There is a second neon tiki bar sign on the other side of the bar incase you forgot what the theme is. As we were leaving, my wife's friends said what I was hoping I'd never hear: "We have to come back here in the summer when the bar is open!" it was at the point I looked down into the water and saw a dead possum floating at the edge of the breakwall. That pretty much summed up the evening.

on the bright side of things, my torch heads arrived from Hawaii today. :)

-Z

Not a lot of "not-white" people in that picture

I only count one thing wrong… That it's called a tiki bar.

I am glad you posted about this joint, I had heard about it and wondered if it was worth driving out to some evening, but clearly, it isn't. (Unless waterlogged possum corpses somehow relate to tiki in some fashion of which I'm unaware!)

[ Edited by: trasenstine 2007-06-01 21:34 ]

The Virus is spreading...

a dozen or 2 miles south of Tin Fish is a local restaurant that's been around for years. I've just been informed that they've added a Tiki Bar to their patio. :roll: Now, to be honest, the link below says nothing about a tiki bar, but their newspaper announcement went on and on about tiki this and tiki that, and what a great place it is to enjoy a beer. :x It's very close to my house, so I'll have to take some sad, sad pictures to arouse everyone's ire.

Luna Kai

-Z

When are "tiki bar" owners finally going to get the picture? You should see how bad it is in west central Florida!
Ok, here are my answers:

1. no palm thatching
2. no bamboo
3. neon signs?????
4. NO TIKIS!
5. higher prices than Trader Vic's

Now, for extra credit:

I would bet ANYONE $100.00, if we had sound with that picture, there is no Martin Denny playing in the Background. Maybe some Bob Marley if your lucky.

Tiki Bill.

Can I find anything wrong with it?

Heck yeah, it's not on fire or atleast a smuldering pile.