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Beyond Tiki, Bilge, and Test / Bilge

Send me your Cool Tiki Stuff....

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Hey Everyone, I know if you are like me, you are asking yourself, Self, I have collected all this cool Tiki Stuff, Now What?
Well I know! Send it to me, Do it now! I will even let you pay for shipping.
Don't that sound just swell!!!! Why collect all that stuff that just takes up room on that great BambooBen shelf on your wall,

when you can just send it to me, so "I" can clutter up my home & save you all that dusting, I will even take a picture of your
sent items, so you can enjoy them anytime you wish.

:tiki: Do it Now :tiki:


Now Punk & Tiki mix well, like a Mai Tai with attitude.
But what do I know? I am just a punk with a Mai Tai.

[ Edited by: Atomic Tiki Punk 2009-09-16 23:20 ]

[ Edited by: Atomic Tiki Punk 2009-09-16 23:20 ]

OK, so your asking who the what? Can this guy really dust? so here is a picture of me....
I am on my way to Sunday Haka.

Here is my house, please note the classic security system, its original 1950s, still the best security system you can get.

"Got Gort?"

[ Edited by: Atomic Tiki Punk 2009-09-17 01:23 ]

[ Edited by: Atomic Tiki Punk 2009-09-17 01:24 ]

Meet the wife....

Well, you could at least provide your address.

i suspect this is all a clever
photoshopped manipulation scam....
to get our stuff...

and WE pay the shipping?
dude!
That's what ,in my neighborhood,we refer to as "mooching"!
:)
Why not trade non-tiki stuff for tiki stuff
or at least pay shipping....

Whaddya say?
hmmmm....?

put the effort in to hunt down and create your own collection like everyone else did.

you can't blame the kid for trying....

Kenny,Kenny....manipulation?, I think the intention is quite clear, no subterfuge at all, no sneaky scams, like..
"you send me your Tiki Stuff, bring two forms of ID to our office in Fashion Island, you get a free trip to Orange County,Calif.
or what ever city you happen to live in, already. Oh, sit threw this 3 hour sales pitch for Time sharing on our New Condo project on the Moon.
which we neglected to tell you about in the first place, Kinda thing........

I am doing you a favor, plus you will feel good that you paid for shipping, because you are helping the economy!
And freeing up space to put more things on that Great BambooBen shelf on your wall.

Economic emergency solved!
Now don't you feel better, now......

Sophista-tiki, Sophista-tiki, Sophista-tiki

I have input your post into my "Marvac 1000" Super Computer and it confirms you are lacking the Levity Gene!
I am sorry to bring you this dire news & there is no known cure.

Further inquiry's has brought to light the fact, That you! are the "Pillager of Rapa Nui" and we would like our Moais Back ASAP!

Also you have been chosen to host in your front yard this year the largest gathering of Maori Warriors in the world
where they will perform the Worlds largest "Haka" just for you, You will get no nose rub.....

See,See what your lack of Levity has brought you...

mama told me not to suffer fools...

this isn't economic recovery
but
simply economic distribution...
Just cleared up about 20x10 feet of wall space via sales this month...
maybe some of you could help ME by sending some stuff to fill MY walls!

You won't regret it!
it'll look great with all the other Tiki stuff
I've hunted for and EARNED
over the years....

Wouldn't it feel better if ALL the beautiful Tiki things
adorning your hut
were ones that you actually had to work for?
:)

Kenny, I will be sending you my 20x10 limited edition signed print Called "Big Trouble in little Tiki Town"
I just did not have anyplace to hang it.

That 20x10 size is a bitch...

Send me your wife.

You two are very persuasive.

But I love my Party City tikis and Corona beer parrots so much I don't think I could part with them.

Sabu

Unga Bunga,
You forgot to say please, so...no I will not send you my wife
But Thanks for Playing, you do get a years supply of Mac-N-Cheese, enjoy!

R

this post is a waste.. only good for atp to get more posts credited to his name....oh and to start bickering on tc..

Sabu,
Your Passion has moved me, I to, love my Party City parrots and Corona beer tikis.
Thanks for playing, you get a lovely "Chinet" Kitchen assortment, enjoy...

ron-tiki,

I also have input your post into my "Marvac 1000" Super Computer and it confirms you are lacking the Levity Gene!

there's no such thing as a Levity gene...
i looked it up....

the condition of levity involves
relaxing the sphincter muscle...
a muscle,not a gene...

maybe you should invest in a Humor gene..
:lol:

There is to, Kenny, I mapped it on my "Marvac 1000" Super Computer using Microsoft Gene Map 2005 software, Don't diss Super Science!

Okay!
i won't diss Super Science
but i will diss Microsoft!

MACs know ALL ABOUT this gene scam you've been perpetratin!
:)

Wow, This thread got bounced out of topics twice now, plus I got some nasty PMs, "not from you Kenny"
Let me just say, this was just my way of bringing some Levity to TC, I am not really asking you to send me stuff, I repeat, this is just a joke!!!! Thought I could give some of you a laugh, you bunch of "Kanye West's"!

Lighten the F**K up! I do collect my own Tiki & have for years, I do make my own Tiki shelves etc. I am a working stiff, so I don't have
large amounts of cash to recreate my favorite Tiki Bar in my home, but I do my best & I do it myself...with my own hands.

Some of you morons might have missed the fact that I did not post an address to send Tiki Stuff, a small clue as to the validity of the post in the first place.

Man I sure would not want to share a Mai Tai with some you guy's out there.
Get a sense of humor already or go home, the world does not need you!

On 2009-09-17 13:54, little lost tiki wrote:
there's no such thing as a Levity gene...
i looked it up....

the condition of levity involves
relaxing the sphincter muscle...
a muscle,not a gene...

maybe you should invest in a Humor gene..
:lol:

The Levity Gene allows for the ability to relax the sphincter muscle, those missing the gene, can not relax the sphincter muscle.
a condition know as Assholeitis, Taken from the World Medical Journal July 1959

This Gene pool is dire need of a pool cleaner.....

OK calming down now, just wanted to say the angry monkey posts were a reply to those of you who PMed me
who just did not get the joke here.

sorry for the innocents who got some blood on them, I have been tested & there is nothing to worry about.
nothing more to see here, please move on....

you should practice in the Bilge area..
That's where all the fun happens...
Where else could one make a topic called 'Post pictures of yourself WHEN you were thin and good looking" and get away with it?
Bilge is a great place to practice
AND accumulate posting "points"!
:)

Oh....
i see you've discovered Bilge...

Just for the record..ATP (Lance) is an AWESOME person, with a great sense of humor, and a big, big heart full of Aloha. Sometimes that word gets bandied around here (along with 'ohana) without it really having much meaning. The unfortunate thing about this kind of medium is that sometimes things get lost in translation. It WAS just a joke...the irony being that Lance doesn't really NEED to solicit "donations" to his collection. He and his wife have an AMAZING collection, much of which he has created himself..he's that talented. He has offered help where help is needed, AND opened his home, home bar and backyard paradise to tired and weary tiki shop slaves. He's a nice guy who, unfortunately, got flamed for an attempt at humor. Let's relax, shall we?

Hi Pua!
:)
i think this thread will make a wonderful addition to Bilge....
with all us other kooks!
:)

Hi Kinny:

Hugs to you! :)

K

Greetings,

I am the executor of the will for the owner of the worlds largest antique Tiki collection. This collection includes items collected from around the globe and is currently the best collection anywhere. What most people don't know is that Mr Johnson collected multiple copies of each item and stored them in various locations around the globe with each location housing nearly $1,000,000 worth of artifacts.

Several of these locations require someone from the US to claim them.

If you would be willing to process the claims, I would split the items in those locations with you 50/50.

All I require from you is a good faith payment of $10,000 that you can send to me via ScamUnion. Once received I will give you the information to make the first claim.

Please respond promptly as some of the locations are at risk of demolition and if we are not able to get these artifacts out in time they will be lost forever.

Please Reply to: [email protected]

Wow! That sounds great, as soon as I get my money from the British Lottery & a Nigerian Prince
I am sending that cash right to you,

Thanks Pua! Your the greatest & the keeper of true Aloha!

I'm very interested in sending you all of my Shag originals, prints, mugs and books. I've had them so long I feel I don't look at them enough anymore. So, my only requirement is that you look at each and every piece every day, without blinking, for a minimum of 1 hour each. In addition I will send you my wife for no extra charge. enjoy!

[ Edited by: tiki-riviera 2009-09-18 13:37 ]

tiki-riviera,
Your offer is da Kind, I asked my wife, she would like to know if your wife does windows?
Also, who is this Shag, you speak of, does he have a talking Dog, drives a Van?

After enough Mai Tai's I will look at anything as long as you like!

On 2009-09-18 11:06, KeithH wrote:
Greetings,

I am the executor of the will for the owner of the worlds largest antique Tiki collection. This collection includes items collected from around the globe and is currently the best collection anywhere. What most people don't know is that Mr Johnson collected multiple copies of each item and stored them in various locations around the globe with each location housing nearly $1,000,000 worth of artifacts.

Several of these locations require someone from the US to claim them.

If you would be willing to process the claims, I would split the items in those locations with you 50/50.

All I require from you is a good faith payment of $10,000 that you can send to me via ScamUnion. Once received I will give you the information to make the first claim.

Please respond promptly as some of the locations are at risk of demolition and if we are not able to get these artifacts out in time they will be lost forever.

Please Reply to: [email protected]

now THAT was funny

Hey Dawn has shown up in Bilge, Slumming are we?

Or,are you here to pass more judgement on us....

Hey its kinda like the old Vegas Strip here in Bilge, the stuffed shirts are uptown, but we got Frankie's & the Double Down
Thanks Mr. Moss, yes .....oh...look out for that drug addict there......

speak for yourself!
This is the SOPHISTIMICATED section!
Fancy pants and all that!

Ahhhhhhhhh....Hillbilly's

Ahhhhhhhhh....Hillbilly's*

Hillbilly's what?

apparently stuffed shirt hillbilly elitists.

W

Yet we're always there with a helpin hand to kindly point out a misplaced comma.

ATP certainly did misplace that thar comma thang!
It's looking some high-falootin Possessive with the
HillBilly's...
That thar boy needs some grammarin
and English Schoolin!
No wonder nobody's sending the poor critter any goods....

I was startled at the site of Hillbillies, you see my family was slaughtered by deformed inbread hillbillies, on a camping trip
many years ago, in the old Nevada nuclear test range area......The Horror! The Horror!

[ Edited by: Atomic Tiki Punk 2009-09-21 14:17 ]

W

Oh yeah, I read about that in the Weekly World News...How the hillbillies took you in and raised you as one of their own piglets out in the sty with that big blue ribbon sow they had. Then one morning for no good reason at all you just up and went crazy and using the pistol you got for Christmas you killed your sow mama...

And now whenever you're eating bacon and happen to catch the scent of gunpowder on the wind...You cry.

Pages: 1 2 64 replies