Welcome to the Tiki Central 2.0 Beta. Read the announcement
Tiki Central logo
Celebrating classic and modern Polynesian Pop

Beyond Tiki, Bilge, and Test / Beyond Tiki

Alright ladies time to get healthy

Pages: 1 14 replies

S
suicide_sam posted on 11/09/2003

I'm just passing along the news, so don't make a jerk out of me.

http://www.qfl.8k.com/z1023032.html

D
DawnTiki posted on 11/09/2003

I find the article hard to swallow. But nice try :wink: http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/hoaxes/fellatio.asp

[ Edited by: DawnTiki on 2003-11-09 17:34 ]

T
tikifish posted on 11/09/2003

You almost had me until I got to this line..

"Only with regular occurance will your chances be reduced, so I encourage all women out there to make fellatio an important part of their daily routine," said Dr. Helena Shifteer, one of the researchers at the University. "Since the emergence of the research, I try to fellate at least once every other night to reduce my chances."

BS
Bike Shack posted on 11/09/2003

Wow Thanks for the alert suicide_sam, I will
do my best to pass important information along.

S
SugarCaddyDaddy posted on 11/09/2003

HA! This is too funny! So pleading and begging isn't the key....SCARE TACTICS are! Yeah, why didn't I think of that!?

The parts of the article that had me rolling were:

~ "..new research being performed at North Carolina State University.."
Are we talking about a new exposed level of professor/student relations?

~ "Only with regular occurance will your chances be reduced, so I encourage all women out there to make fellatio an important part of their daily routine," said Dr. Helena Shifteer...The study is reported in Friday's Journal of Medical Research..."
How many of your wives/girlfriends/significant-other actually reads this publication? Will this be a record sell-out month? A new surge in subscriptions?

~ Dr. Len Lictepeen, deputy chief medical officer for the American Cancer Society, said..."This will hopefully change women's practice and patterns, resulting in a severe drop in the future number of cases,"
Of course he'll say that! He's a guy! Ha!

~ "There's definitely fertile ground for more research. Many have stepped forward to volunteer for related research now in the planning stages,"
Yeah, and call Guiness too, since this will go on the books as the World's Longest Male Waiting Line NOT Waiting To Buy Sports Tickets!

You know, what they will probably really find out is that actually just doing bobbing head-neck exercises (without actually performing fellatio) will somehow miraculously reduce the risk of cancer.

Keep on the lookout for females walking like pigeons.

[ Edited by: SugarCaddyDaddy on 2003-11-09 10:40 ]

BK
Basement Kahuna posted on 11/10/2003

I have been preaching this doctrine to the ladies all along. I'm just glad it's legit now! :)

F
FLOUNDERart posted on 11/10/2003

Yea Haw! What about us guys and our testies?


Mahalo
Original Art by Flounder

http://www.flounderart.com

[ Edited by: FLOUNDERart on 2003-11-09 19:10 ]

S
suicide_sam posted on 11/10/2003

On 2003-11-09 00:20, DawnTiki wrote:
I find the article hard to swallow. But nice try :wink: http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/hoaxes/fellatio.asp

[ Edited by: DawnTiki on 2003-11-09 17:34 ]

I still choose to believe the story, just like I choose to believe that wrestling is real, that alcohol really does make me more charming, and that size doesn't matter.

Oops I think I said to much.

FG
Futura Girl posted on 11/12/2003

hahaha you totally got me on this one...
ok, who's gonna make up the prevent testicular cancer web page for the gurrls? huh?

T
tikifish posted on 11/12/2003

HOUSECLEANING HELPS PREVENT TESTICULAR CANCER!

The constant whirr of a vaccuum cleaner or dishwasher helps stop the formation if unhealthy cells in the scrotum, doctors at the University of Toronto say. "The more frequent, the better" says Dr. Yvonna Humpalot, cheif of oncology. "Hoover, Electrolux, GE - it really doesn't matter what breand of appliance they use, they all have positive benefits for the ol' ball sack'. The study was conducted on a control group of 200 men, who at first scoffed at the idea. But after seeing the irrefutable finsings, they were Swiffing up a storm...

FG
Futura Girl posted on 11/12/2003

i was thinking of something of a more parallel nature - not housekeeping...

F
FLOUNDERart posted on 11/12/2003

I like the way Futura Girl thinks. Futura Girl, tell them vacuuming can be done alone, however...

T
thejab posted on 11/12/2003

On 2003-11-12 06:09, Futura Girl wrote:
i was thinking of something of a more parallel nature - not housekeeping...

A recent study found that frequent masturbation by men lowered their risk of prostate cancer. Sorry girls! Perhaps you could watch?

http://therabbithole.icarusindie.com/dearjesus/Documents/Yahoo!%20News%20-%20Masturbating%20Lowers%20Prostate%20Cancer%20Risk%20-Study.htm

F
FLOUNDERart posted on 11/12/2003

This is actually true. I have a superhuman prostate.

BS
Bike Shack posted on 11/12/2003

And oddly enough the word "jerk" was used in suicide_sam'S original post.

Pages: 1 14 replies