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Beyond Tiki, Bilge, and Test / Bilge

The Official Tiki Central's 'Hijack This Thread" Thread.

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Hey guys, I'm new here, but I've been lurking around here for awhile.

I've been into tikis ever since Goofy molested me behind the tikis in Adventureland. I really look forward to all the help you guys can give me, as I have been trying to recreate that magic evening ever since.

hey, that guy never posted on my thread, why should I post on his?
maybe he just got busy, he could be a nice guy.
SCREW him, he's an egocentric little twit.
come on lighten up, how can ALL teh carvers commit on every single other carver's threads?
Benzart does.
Benzart is different.
Hey where did my drink go?
You shouldn't be carving while drinking.
Shut the fuck up!

W

Also there is no evidence in brochures or ads from the period of pink being a primary color for the original inlays prior to the 1967 relaunch.

The pink inlay examples that were made during the original period are all from northern California and were not actually part of the original product line. They were custom fitted by Karikson's son-in-law, J. Polkner, who had a small metal fabrication and electroplating business, PolKner LTD. Karikson-Co sold Polkner LTD pieces that were 90% completed and Polkner LTD did inlays as ordered by their generally more upscale clients.

Most of Polkner's colors were similar to Karikson's original colors but the names were different. This wasn't an issue of copyright, just creative preferences. Karikson-Co's names had various inspirations, PolKner LTD usually went with a nautical/beach theme. Some examples :

Karikson-Co..............................Polkner LTD

Blaze••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••Sundown
Peacock•••••••••••••••••••••••••••Aqua Wave
Lemon Mist••••••••••••••••••••••••Chiffon Sail
Forest•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••Green Seas
Cloud••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••Beach Sand
Limelight•••••••••••••••••••••••••••Key Lime
Cinamon•••••••••••••••••••••••••••Port Light

The main color differences were Karikson-Co's black, brown, and, gray ("Night","Coffee", and "Silver"), and Polkner LTD's pink, terra cotta, blue, and light blue ("Flamingo","Puerto","Mediteranean", and "Polynesian").


woofmutt

[ Edited by: woofmutt 2008-07-05 21:44 ]

The Mysterious TikiCleen seen golfing just outside Vegas. Musta got a new job.

It's summer, yet I miss the tan ones.

That's your sister? She must have a wonderful personality.

T

I think the 'bubble & squeak' she was talking about was the British culinary delight, but it still reminded me of this -

W

I see yer BEAT OFF and raise yuh a BONER...

W

Even my vague rant felt too pointed. Yet here I am saying something nonetheless. Yes, I am an asshole. But I've known that since 1986.

K
KuKu posted on Sun, Mar 8, 2009 9:48 AM

Dig down deep, wallop the polyp, then look me in the eye...

It's itchy, scratchy and it's spreading. Is that bad?

W

"It's itchy, scratchy and it's spreading. Is that bad?"

The itch and scratch could mean you're allergic to wool. The spreading means your wife (God rest her shark ravaged soul in the briny deep) probably didn't use the right hooks when crocheting the sweater. A controlled wash in hot water might stop the spreading by causing some shrinking in the yarn. It's worked for me with sweaters that kept spreading. But if you do it wrong you could end up with a thick felt pot holder.

[ But if you do it wrong you could end up with a thick felt pot holder.

I remember the horror that was the classroom that day..... all of us weaving our little pot holders on those tiny plastic looms. It was all giggles and smiles until the rain set in.

W

Which reminds me of my first trip to San Francisco one spring break. Of course we went to "the Haight" as the old folks who though they were kids called it. I dunno why we hadda go see the place. I never liked the Grateful Dead nor was I intrigued by all the tie dye wearing pot holders weaving along the sidewalk or asking for spare change.

Here's my idea of a good pot holder:

Here's my idea of a good pot holder:

After watching the road-side signs for what seemed like the last forever the freeway exit sign looms large in the windshield. Wanton anticipation finally breaks into visible excitement as the twists and turns in the road keep the neon sign just out of sight, just around the next corner. Not only do I really have to pee, but I finally get to see the Home of the Cup Flipper!

Speaking of pot holders, you know what I really hate? You find a store you've never seen before, and it's selling everything you've dreamed of for amazing prices. You buy everything you want and can't believe your good fortune. You return the next day to buy more, only to find the store is gone and an empty lot in it's place. In the middle of the lot is an Indian warrior sitting on a pure white Stallion, he looks at you and speaks "you are the chosen one to lead the people to freedom and safety, wear this talisman and you'll be protected from all Evil" to which I reply "shut up you friggin idiot, what the hell happened to the store?"

i know a few good pot-holders....
and they're holding!
:)

W

I was going past a vacant lot today and saw this Indian warrior with a single tear trickling down his cheek. I felt kinda bad and wondered if he'd seen me dumping a fridge, four old tires, and last year's Xmas tree in the lot. But now I know it was Tiki-Thunderbird who made him cry. Jeez. What a jerk.

The Indian warrior was crying because he was hungry, so I went back to my tent and filled my flashlight with beans and took it to him. Woofmutt almost let a Indian warrior starve to death. Just because Custer was your great great great uncle is no excuse.

K
KuKu posted on Tue, Mar 10, 2009 4:31 PM

I like pie, can woofmutt get us free custard pie...?

Is this love is this love is this love is this love that I'm feeling?

From the Myspace in box:

Hello Am tammy by name am from germany berlin single ,never married and dont have kids also,am here to seek for my soulemate lover,that understanding man ,well i am sorry that i dont have pics on my profile,but i tryed to upload my pics and it did not laod up,so if u care to get to know more about me and we can share pics and get to know ourselfs,you can email me on (...) or (...) we talk more,well no one knows how True love comes and No one knows when it comes,why not give it a try and never loose Hope.
Thanks Am online Now.
Tammy.

To those of you who would dismiss this with a reference to a salty canned meat product I'd like to remind you of Tammy By Name's words... "...No one knows how True love comes and No one knows when it comes,why not give it a try and never loose Hope."

On 2009-03-11 23:17, woofmutt wrote:
Is this love is this love is this love is this love that I'm feeling?

From the Myspace in box:

Hello Am tammy by name am from germany berlin single ,never married and dont have kids also,am here to seek for my soulemate lover,that understanding man ,well i am sorry that i dont have pics on my profile,but i tryed to upload my pics and it did not laod up,so if u care to get to know more about me and we can share pics and get to know ourselfs,you can email me on (...) or (...) we talk more,well no one knows how True love comes and No one knows when it comes,why not give it a try and never loose Hope.
Thanks Am online Now.
Tammy.

To those of you who would dismiss this with a reference to a salty canned meat product I'd like to remind you of Tammy By Name's words... "...No one knows how True love comes and No one knows when it comes,why not give it a try and never loose Hope."

I emailed her and she sent me pics.. WOW! She is beautiful, I think we're soulemate lovers..this is my
reward for never loose hope:)

I had loose hope once, the doctor prescribed charcoal biscuits. Worked brilliantly. My hope was right back to normal in a matter of days.

I got jipped!
My doctor told me to use them at my next backyard barbecue.

K
KuKu posted on Fri, Mar 13, 2009 3:16 AM

Last time I BBQ'ed my backyard I got sent to the DR. who says there is no hope for me but to try & just hang loose...

The nice Doctor lady, the one who puts the sparks in my head, she said there was no hope for me. She keeps saying I have completely lost my mind and the best she can do is make me comfortable. Well..... the jokes on her! I never had a mind to loose in the first place!

W

A mind too loose can lead to some interesting times.

Yep, them was interesting times.......

I can remember back in '82, you weren't even a gleam in your fathers eye then were you? Yeah, back in '82, we had to use the phone and manually dial into the network, only we didn't call it the 'net back then we called them bulletin boards. But that name never really made much sense because I never could get the tacks to stick worth a damn into that hard plastic Ma-Bell made the phones out of.

And.... Happy Birthday to the Net! Well, to HTTP at least.

http://news.cnet.com/8301-10787_3-10195512-60.html?tag=nl.e432

20 Years!

Picture proof that mankind is devolving.

Crack kills

What might this be picture proof of I wonder.

or this one

WTF?

HUH? "Oscar Mayer Weinermobile Crashes into Wisconsin Home"?????
Punchline please.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090718/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_weinermobile_wreck

I give up, link not working.

[ Edited by: Jungle Trader 2009-07-17 23:07 ]

Dammit Yahoo, that's not how you spell it, It's Oscar Meyer. I grew up with this and I know. The Weinermobile was cool when I was a kid.

W

Some cautionary images images from the 101 Strings album The "Exotic" Sounds of Love posted by Jeff Central in the Tiki Music thread Challenge for the Les Baxter 101 Strings Experts

See? You really can put someones eye out with that thing.

So, if an older woman stalks younger prey and she's called a cougar, what would a man be called that stalks younger women?,.........a man?,....manther? peacock?

MN

HAAAHHHH!!!!! Gene is judging a drag queen beauty contest.

They are a lot better looking than "Rachel" at the Ultramar.

W

I seriously doubt that I'm the only one who ever thought lil decorative soaps looked like something good to eat...

But can I really be the only person who ever tried eating one? I mean, as an adult.

T

On 2006-06-06 09:30, lone tiki? wrote:
I haven't got Tourettes Syndrome you stupid witch! :x

Which is what he meant by "fnorkle". And who could forget that (or those) elephant(s)?
I believe it was from '78...

Once you've gotten all of the feathers off just throw it in a pot with your vegetables, put the lid on real tight and throw it in the oven on gas tick 2 for 2 hours.

While that's cooking you can go ahead and get everything else ready. You'll need at least three quarts of rum, some lemons and limes, and two sugar loafs.

W

Hello Tiki Central Friends!
well, plenty of you have bugged,bothered and prodded me for some t-shirts
so...whilst working on some coffee mug designs with Brian at Tikitees
we worked out a deal and i got
the below four designs printed on
XL 100% white cotton tees
with a VERY soft hand
in a very LIMITED RUN
of only 9 apiece of EACH design..
This will be a litmus test to see if people actually will wear and enjoy these designs...
So, if we never print em again-you just got a low-run item from a semi-retarded artist
and that's gotta be worth something!
This will be a litmus test to see if people actually will wear and enjoy these designs...

SIMPLY shoot me a PM and we'll go from there...
The cost is $15 apiece (plus shipping)

If you order all four they will be only $13 apiece (plus shipping)
I imagine shipping will be somewhere between 2-5 bucks....

THIS SALE WILL BE EXCLUSIVELY TIKI CENTRAL for awhile
1 maybe 2 weeks
SO ACT NOW!
DON'T DELAY!

and then I'm gonna throw the remainders up on the website/myspace/facebook etc....

but for now....
These are Limited to only 9 apiece so First Come/First Serve
AND THEY MAY NOT EVER EVER BE OFFERED AGAIN!
i may find some other designs that amuse me.....

Please indicate WHICH shirt/shirts you want by title....
If you want me to title and sign the shirt
please indicate WHERE on the garment in your PM
and REMEMBER... these are ALL XL
So if you;re too small....GROW!
If you're too big....SHRINK!
and if you don't have any other complaints.....SHUSH!
:)
easy-peasy!

and Yes! We do take paypal!
Here are all the shirts laying about on my uncomfortable couch in the studio....

First Shirt... "Four Faces" (Hawaiian)

Second Shirt... "the Nervous Guest" (PNG)

Third Shirt... "the Gossips" (Rapa Nui)

Third Shirt... "the Friend Collector" (Maori)
the pic of the tee shirt got all whited out from the flash... didn't turn out....sorry!

Thanks again!

Have you ever had a conversation with someone, standing directly in front of you, and they never look you in the eye? Always looking about a foot away from your face? As if there is somebody else there? Weird people.

Have you ever looked the mirror? :D

Did you hear that smell?






Have you ever had a conversation with someone, standing directly in front of you, and they never look you in the eye? Always looking about a foot away from your face? As if there is somebody else there?* -Jungle Trader-

In that case it's usually some eye thingmajig that makes it look as if they aren't looking at you when in fact they are. Or it's me trying to bug you.

The humorous interaction that has happened to me more than a few times is I'm talking with someone at a show or party and he/she/they keep glancing over my shoulder then suddenly says or "Hold on a sec..." and walk off. For the rest of the night.

I admit that there are far more interesting, cooler, and definitely sexier people to talk to than myself, so I can understand someone leaping at a chance to stand by another person who is not me. It's the pretending to be interested or that they'll be popping back over that I find annoying.

Much better was the couple who just turned their backs on me mid-sentence and walked off. While others might have considered such behavior rude to me it plainly said "You're boring and we don't want to talk to you."

Online interaction is the best. Online you either read someone's words or you don't. No pretending, no autograph signing, and no wondering "Did he catch me rolling my eyes when he started talking about the t-shirts he has for sale?"

W

Oh hell, I already made a similar bitch and moan rant. Well, I'm an idiot. Avoid me at parties.

But here's a fun conversation gag I learned from an old college chum: If you're a guy talking to another guy every other minute or so just flick your eyes to the other guy's crotch.

This probably only works best with casual acquaintances as a good friend will usually ask why the hell your glancing at his crotch and a stranger will either get dangerously irritated or particularly interested. But if you pick the right mark you can really confuse or unnerve him. Or get set up on a blind date with his wife's cousin David.

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