Club Woofmutt

Finally another way to spend all that money yer tired of lugging around in your wallet...Become a Club Woofmutt member!

With your Club Woofmutt membership you get:

*** A hand drawn Woofmutt Club member card

• A box of Pop Tarts

• Some other things Woofmutt has laying around

• A personal "I can't believe you went for this!" letter from Woofmutt**

But wait, there's more!

Club Woofmutt members in good standing will always be referred to by Woofmutt as "My Friend [your name here]" in public and in writing!

And L@@K at the world of pleasure your Club Woofmutt will open:

With your Club Woofmutt membership card, you will get the opportunity for Woofmutt to purchase you a beer at any bar where Woofmutt happens to be drinking and it’s Happy Hour and they have $1 beers!

Here's how it works: On your hand drawn Club Woofmutt card are 3 Xs. If you are one of the first 3 Club Woofmutt members at the bar to approach Woofmutt for a free beer, he’ll punch out your card & purchase you a beer of his choosing. Limit of 1 beer per bar per person and a limit of $1 per beer. However… If you’re the 4th person to approach Woofmutt to purchase a beer instead of punching your card he’ll punch your face. Then you'll buy him dinner.

With Club Woofmutt membership you'll also get...

1. The limited edition Club Woofmutt exclusive glass vase shown below!

There are only 11 memberships available and only 11 of these vases were emptied by Woofmutt himself!

2. An annual fully hosted bash at Woofmutt's West Howl INN where the beer and tequila will flow freely from the Perro Torero bar and you can stuff yourself on a helluva lotta Taco Bell burritos!

3. Club Woofmutt member you'll have FIRST DIBS on buying exclusive Woofmutt Stuff & Junk Like That merchandise when and if Woofmutt ever gets around to making any.

4. Awesomeness!

The cost for all of this? Only $1000!!! A little higher than some clubs, but did we mention the party will all you can eat Taco Bell burritos???

Stay tuned for details on where to send the money.

UPDATE! Club Woofmutt now proudly announces the Club Woofmutt Muy Especial GROG Club Level membership. For an additional $378.92 you get all the Club Woofmutt coolness PLUS:

• A special roped off area to stand behind at all Club Woofmutt get togethers.

• A Club Woofmutt muy especial Grog "club"! (The GROG club is a pencil that has been gnawed on by GROG.)

• A heightened sense of awesomeness that the regular Club Woofmutt just can't quite get you.

[ Edited by: woofmutt 2010-10-07 08:09. This message was a spoof of some odd club some company was actually promoting on Tiki Central. Woof mutt can't recall what it was all about which is a lie cuz woodfmutt can recall all sorts of stuff particularly stuff other people have forgotten. Speaking of which, other people are wondering why woofmutt came back and edited this post in January of 2012. But woofmutt has no answers to that. Not yet anyway. We'll see. Maybe it's something special. It's not, but wouldn't it be cool if it was? ]

[ Edited by: woofmutt 2012-01-10 21:09 ]

On 2009-05-12 10:22, woofmutt wrote:

Stay tuned for details on where to send the money.

Here's the link so you can paypal the money to join:

[email protected]

Woof said he's kind of busy right now, so if you don't hear from him right away after sending the money, don't worry, your membership kit is on the way.

Buzzy Out!

He's also got a great affiliate program going --

http://www.cafepress.com/yoyoisland

-- So hurry on in for all your Official Club Woofmutt collectibles!

Be sure to enter the secret code, "Sprinkles", for your special club discount!

S :D K

Well, my box of pop tarts came in the mail today.
I LOVE YOU CLUB WOOFMUT!!

My friend Unga Bunga was part of a limited membership beta test of Club Woofmutt. As you can see he is already reaping the rewards.

He also got this muy especial surprise with his Club Woofmutt beta test membership:

Nice, huh?

Who knows what cool crap will come your way when you become a Club Woofmutt member!

(For the sake of full disclosure: You won't be getting a box of paper clips. I only had one.)

GROG sent $950 to Woofy' link that Buzzy post, so GROG $50 short. Can GROG just pay the rest when GROG see you?

Sorry man, to busy trying to sweep up all the sprinklez, er um, sprinkles to hop on to any new woofwhatever endeavor...

Am I too late to join? I can turn in my recyclables and I'll only be 995.00 short?

dammit! you were here for dinner and you didnt chat me up and sell me a Club Woofmutt membership??!! what, my money isn't good enough for the Mighty Woof?

fine, i can trade desserts and fluffy white dogs for a chance to be in your very exclusive club.

is there like a scholarship or grant program to help us afford the membership?

I really want that vase!

llt: maybe we can get pool our resources and time-share one membership!

but that would require math.

woofmutt what an ass.

On 2009-05-12 11:08, Son-of-Kelbo wrote:
He's also got a great affiliate program going --

http://www.cafepress.com/yoyoisland

-- So hurry on in for all your Official Club Woofmutt collectibles!

Be sure to enter the secret code, "Sprinkles", for your special club discount!

S :D K

Could you just send Sprinkles over? Tell her I want the Cincinnati Bowtie; she'll know what I mean...

Yes indeed.

I've been getting tons of PMS, emails, and a couple pairs of panties thrown at me so here are some questions answered:

1. No.
2. No.
3. Yes, but I've never been to Kentucky.
4. No.
5. Seriously, NO so stop gawdammed asking me!
6. Yes.
7. Yes.
8. Yes.
9. Oh gawd, yes!
10. That's a clever way to look at it but no.
11. Thanks, but for you it'll be $5 thousand. Sorry, it's not me it's you.
12. Yes, it is a lot of money. Perhaps you'd be happier in a less exclusive club.

what would you be willing to trade for a membership. Ive got a whole truck load of rotted deck wood. will that get me in?

I heard club Woofmutt was the new cool trendy thing, so I decided I had to join, even if it
would cut back on my American Idol viewing time.

Yesterday I received my Club Woofmutt kit, boy was I excited. Inside I was thrilled to find a
special Woofmutt Tiki decoder ring. Following the instructions, I found a secret coded message
written on the side of an empty KFC eight piece bucket left inside a doghouse behind Woofmutt's trailer.
I raced home as fast as I could to decode this top secret message. I spent four hours working furiously to decode my personal message from President Woofmutt. Finally, near total exhaustion, I completed it to
discover it read: "Drink your Ovaltine" WTF?!?!?!!?!?!?!?

I don't know Woofmutt, but if I meet him, and he's not bigger than me, and I have a bat, I will beat him unitl I get my money back!!

Will there be an instantly recognizable hat that shows those sneeches with no star (losers) who the real shit is?

BUY a CLUB WOOFMUTT membership
for your loved ones this Holiday Season!

free TikiJoe's Ocean Christmas CD
wih every membership!
:lol:

Stops Copies Me!

Thanks for the bump, Liloti. We still have the full amount of limited numbered memberships available.

BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE!

Until December 24th ONLY for an extra $30 you can buy the exclusive PLAIN WHITE LEVEL Club Woofmutt Membership which will not only entitle you to buy Woofmutt a White Russian if you see him at a bar but Woofmutt will also loudly proclaim to all in the bar "Hey! Everyone! MY good friend [Your Name Here] just bought me a White Russian! This guy/gal is the awsomenest!"

Sounds amazing, huh? **Well sit down on your big fat lazy ass for this...**With your PLAIN WHITE LEVEL Club Woofmutt membership you'll also have your choice of the ultra exclusive soon to be never spoke of again limited edition Little Lost Tiki T-Shirts!!!

"What's a Little Lost Tiki t-shirt?" you ask because your head is up your ass. Well let me sing this little song I made up about them...

Four designs printed on XL 100% white cotton tees with a VERY soft hand in a very LIMITED RUN of only 9 apiece of EACH design. These are Limited to only 9 apiece so First Come/First Serve AND THEY MAY NOT EVER EVER BE OFFERED AGAIN!

First Shirt... "Four Faces" (Hawaiian)

Second Shirt... "the Nervous Guest" (PNG)

Third Shirt... "the Gossips" (Rapa Nui)

Third Shirt... "the Friend Collector" (Maori)
the pic of the tee shirt got all whited out from the flash... didn't turn out....sorry!

An Extra $30 will get you a $15 t-shirt and the chance to buy Woofmutt a drink. Yes, Virginny, there is a Santa Claus!

what a Deal!
What about the Free TikiJoe's Ocean Christmas CD?
Is there a membership for that?

I have dreamed of this membership since inception. Now with even more improved crap in the kit I just can't pass it up. But secretly...I am lusting after that Wolfmutt decoder ring. I am so over my diamonds and precious stones...I need something really plastic and hoaky.

Woffy...is it possible to throw in one of those fabulous ass pictures (signed of course) cause I would certainly hang that in a prime spot on the wall of the VampTiki Lounge. That would just scream "Tiki."

I want to point out that Club Woofmutt doesn't have any fewer members than the "Club Tiki", that may (I'm just saying) have been the inspiration (or, rather, provocation) for Club Woofmutt.
Some time has gone by, since the inception of Club Woofmutt. Since it just got bumped, I thought newcomers to this thread should know about Club Tiki (still coming soon!), in order to fully appreciate the brilliance that is Club Woofmutt.

"The rum's the thing..."

[ Edited by: Limbo Lizard 2009-12-03 14:26 ]